wilt find, at the length, notwithstanding thy fwaggering, that the firft will do us best service. Sligo. Well, but All. Hear him, hear him! Broad. It is my notion, then, brethren, that we do forthwith fend for a finful man in the flesh, called an attorney. Sligo. An attorney! Broad. Ay, an attorney; and that we do direct him to take out a parchment instrument, with a feal fixed thereto. Sligo. Paw, pox what good can that do? Bread. Don't be too hafty, friend Sligo. And therewith, I fay, let him poffefs the outward tabernacle of the vain man, who delighteth to call himself President, and carry him before the men cloathed in lambfkin, who at Westminster are now fitting in judgment. Sligo. Paw! a law-fuit! that won't end with our lives. Let us march! All. Ay, ay. Sligo. Come, Dr. Habakkuk, will you march in the front or the rear? Hab. Pardon me, doctor! I cannot attend you. Sligo. What, d'ye draw back, when it comes to the push? Hab. Not at all; I would gladly join in putting these Philiftines to flight! for I abhor them worse than hogs' puddings, in which the unclean beast and the blood are all jumbled together. Sligo. Pretty food, for all that. Hab. But this is Saturday; and I dare not draw my fword on the Sabbath. Sligo. Then ftay with your brother Melchifedech; for, though of different religions, you are both of a kidney. Come, doctors; out with your fwords! Huzza! and now for the Lane! Huzza! [Exeunt. Manent Broadbrim and Habakkuk. 2 Broad. Friend Habakkuk, thou seeft how headstrong and wilful these men are: but let us ufe difcretion, however. Wilt thou step to the Inn that taketh its name from the city of Lincoln? enquire there for a man, with a red rag at his back, a fmall black cap on his pate, and a bufhel of hair on his breaft? I think they call him a ferjeant. Hab. They do. Broad. Then, without let or delay, bring him hither, I pray thee. Hab. I will about it this inftant. Broad, His admonition, perhaps, may prevail. Use dispatch, I beseech thee, friend Habakkuk, Hab. As much as if I was pofting to the Treafury, to obtain a large fubfcription in a new loan, or a lottery. Broad. Nay, then, friend, I have no reason to fear thee. THE COLLEGE. [Exeunt Devil (as Hellebore, the Prefident) Camphire, Calomel Secretary, and Pupils, difcovered. Sec. The Licentiates, Sir, will foon be at hand. Hel. Let them! Cal. We will do our duty, however; and, like the patricians of old, receive with filence thefe Vifigoths in the fenate. Hel Hel. I am not, Dr. Calomel, of so pacific a turn: Let us keep the evil out of doors, if we can; if not, vim vi, repel force by force.Barricado the gates! Sec. It is done. Hel. Are the buckets and fire-engine fetched from St. Dunstan's? Sec. They have been here, Sir, this half-hour. Hel. Let twelve apothecaries be placed at the pump, and their apprentices fupply 'em with water! Sec. Yes, Sir. Hel. But let the engine be play'd by old Jollup, from James-ftreet! Not one of the trade has a better hand at directing a pipe. Sec. Mighty well, Sir. Hel. In the time of fiege, every citizen ought in duty to serve.-Having thus, brothers, provided a proper defence, let us coolly proceed to our business. Is there any body here, to demand a licence to-day? Sec. A practitioner, Mr. Prefident, out of the country. Hel. Are the customary fees all discharged? * Sec. All, Sir. Hel. Then let our cenfors, Dr. Chriftopher Camphire, and Dr. Cornelius Calomel, introduce the petitioner for examination. [Exeunt Camphire and Calomel, After this duty is dispatch'd, we will then read the College and Students a lecture. Enter Camphire and Calomel, with Laft. Laft. First, let me lay down my fhoes. [They advance, with three bows, to the table. Hel Hel. Let the candidate be placed on a ftool. 'What's the doctor's name? Sec. Emanuel Laft, Mr. Prefident. Hel. Dr. Laft, you have petitioned the College, to obtain a licence for the practice of phyfic; and though we have no doubt of your great skill and abilities, yet our duty compels us previously to afk a few questions: What academy had the honour to form you? Laft. Anan! Hel. We want to know' the name of the place, where you have ftudied the science of phyfic. Laft. Dunftable. Hel. That's fome German univerfity; fo he can never belong to the College. All. Never; oh, no. Hel. Now, Sir, with regard to your phyfiological knowledge. By what means, Dr. Last, do you difcover that a man is not well? Laft. By his complaint that he is ill. Hel. Well replied! no furer prognostic. Hel. Then, as to recovering a subject that is ill-Can you venture to undertake the cure of an ague? Laft. With arra a man in the country. Hel. By what means? Laft. By a charm. Hel. And pray of what materials may that charm be compofed? Laft. I won't tell; 'tis a fecret. Hel. Well replied! the College has no right to pry into fecrets. All. Oh, no; by no means. Hel. But now, Dr. Laft, to proceed in due form; are you qualified to adminifter remedies to fuch diseases as belong to the head? Laft. Laft. I believe I may. Hel. Name fome to the College. Laft. The tooth-ache. Hel. What do you hold the best method to treat it? Laft. I pulls 'em up by the roots. Hel. Well replied, brothers! that, without doubt, is a radical cure. All. Without doubt. Hel. Thus far as to the head: Proceed we next to the middle! When, Dr. Laft, you are called in to a patient with a pain in his bowels, what then is your method of practice? Laft. I claps a trencher hot to the part. Hel. Embrocation; very well! But if this application should fail, what is the next step that you take? Laft. I gi's a vomit and a purge. Hel. Well replied! for it is plain there is a disagreeable gueft in the houfe; he has opened both doors; if he will go out at neither, it is none of his fault. All. Oh, no; by no means. Hel. We have now dispatched the middle and head: Come we finally to the other extremity, the feet! Are you equally fkilful in the diforders incidental to them? Laft. I believe I may. Hel. Name fome. Laft. I have a great vogue all our way for curing of corns. Hel. What are the means that you ufe? Hel. Well replied! extirpation: No better method of curing can be. Well, brethren, I think we may now, after this ftrict and impar |
