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"Tis strange, and yet true, That you and I meet here together!
Together! That you and I meet here together!"
Said the goose, (with a stare,)
“Mr. Fox, are you there? And to see you, indeed, is a pleasure !
In truth, I must say,
That your visit to-day
" 'Yond measure!”' &c.
And like friends so dear talk, And never was seen finer weather.”
Says the goose, “ gander Grange
Has forbade me to range,
Said the fox, “ let him be,
Take an airing with me; And hear both the goldfinch and linnet! · On the love of a friend
You can, goosy, depend, And”-snapt off her head in a minute!
A minute! “And”-snapt off her head in a minute!
CHAPTER ON NAILS.
Will you list a minute,
There's something comic in it.
A subject which I now have pat
Just at my fingers' ends, sirs.
And some are very queer ones,
And some are very dear ones.
Some little, great, and small, sir,
He rusts for want of use, sir, The misers, they're no nails at all,
They're all a pack of screws, sir, An enemy will get some clouts
If here they chance to roam, sir, For Yankee boys, like hammers, will,
Be sure to drive them home, sir.
Which often proves a sore nail,
To be nailing his employer;
And the devil nails the lawyer. Dame Fortune is a brad-awl,
And often does contrive it To make each nail go easily
Where'er she please to drive it. Then, if I gain your kind applause
For what I've sung or said, sir, Then you'll admit that I have hit
The right nail on the head, sir.
OLD MR. AND YOUNG MRS. TRIM.
Tol lol, &c.
Tol lol, &c. They then got to blows, and made quick an uproar, Which disturbed a gent living upon the first floor, Who up stairs did run, and first did begin With words, but soon after knocked down Mr. Trim.
Tol lol, &c. When Mrs. Trim saw her old husband used so, With the fat leg of mutton she hit Brown a blow, Saying, “ what's that to you, if Tim quarrels with I?” Then she hit him another hard thump on the eye.
Tol lol, &c. Says Brown, I'll be hanged if I meddle again, For I get nought but grease and a great deal of pain; So husbands and wives they may fight if they will, All I'll say will be that they may fight away still.
Tol lol, &c.
LAWYER FLAM, HIS WIFE, AND FLAM'S
OLD Flam was a lawyer so grim,
He married his maid, people say;
But scarce was the honey moon dim
When the devil cried, Flam, come away.
But poor Mrs. Flam could not weep;
Oh oh, &c. · She thought of her love as she lay,
When the ghost of the late Mr. Flam,
Oh! oh, &c.
I wo'n't lie alone in the dark,
Oh! oh, &c.
BACHELOR'S FARE. Funny and free are a bachelor's revelries,
Cherrily, merrily, passes his life; Nothing knows he of connubial deviltries,
Troublesome children and clamorous wife. Free from satiety, care, and anxiety
Charms in variety fall to his share;
This, boys, this, is the bachelor's fare.
Tied to a dog for his torment and dread,
Hurries and worries him till he is dead;
Eld ones are two devils haunted with blue devils,
Young ones are new devils raising despair: Doctors and nurses combining their curses,
Adieu to full purses and bachelor's fare. Through such folly days, once sweet holidays
Soon are embitter'd by wrangling and strife: Wives turn jolly days to melancholy days,
All perplexing and vexing one's life; Children are riotous, maid-servants fly at us,
Mammy to quiet us, growls like a bear; Polly is squalling, and Molly is bawling,
While dad is recalling his bachelor's fare. When they are older grown, then they are bolder
grown, Turning your temper, and spurning your rule: Girls, through foolishness, passion, or mulishness,
Parry your wishes and marry a fool. Boys will anticipate, lavish and dissipate,
All that your busy pate hoarded with care; Then tell me what jollity, fun, and frivolity,
Equals in quality bachelor's fare.
JACK, VAT ARE YOU ARTER? 'Twas summer-time when Nan and I
(And Nan was born to charm me) Once met beside the grunters' sty,
And cried, “ now, Jack, don't harm me?"
But heart for heart we'll barter,”
But Jack, vat are you arter?”
When we agreed to wed, love!
The sweetest things you said, love!