Sir Luke. Was it my fault? what could I do? put yourself in my place; I must have been more, or lefs, than man to refift. Serj. Your fault, Sir Luke, no, no-you did but your duty-but as to my wife Sir Luke. She's a diabolical fiend, I fhall hate her as long as I live. Serj. And I too. эт Sir Luke. Only think of her forcing me, as it were with a fword at my breast, to play, fuch a trick; you, my dear Serjeant, the beft, trueft friend I have in the world. [Weeps.] Serj. [Weeping] Dry your tears, dear Sir Luke; I fhall ever gratefully acknowledge your confidence in trufting me with the fecret-[taking him forward.] But I think it might be as well kept from the reft of the world. Sir Luke. My dear foul, do you think I would tell it to any mortal but you? No, no, not to my brother himfelf-You are the only man upon earth I wou'd truft Serj. Ten thoufand thanks, my dear friend! fure there is no comfort, no balfam in life like a friend-but I fhall make Madam Circuit remember Sir Luke. We neither of us ought to forgive, her were l you, I'd get a divorce..i 1 Serj. So I will-provided you will promife not to marry her after. Sir Luke. Me! I'll fooner be torn to pieces by wild horfes-no, my dear friend, we will retire to my house in the country together, and there, in innocence and fimplicity, feeding our pigs and pigeons, like Pyramus and Thibe, we will live the paragons of the age. Serj. Agreed; we will be the whole earth to each other; for, as Mr. Shakespur fays, "The friend thou haft and his adoption try'd Clafp to thy foul, and quit the world befide." Sir Luke. Zouns, here comes Madam Serjeant herfelf. Enter Enter Mrs. Circuit. Mrs Cir. So, Gentleinen! a fweet tête-a-tête you have been holding-but I know it all, not a fyllable you have faid has been loft. Sir Luke. Then, I hope you have been well enter tained Mrs. Circuit ? Mrs. Cir. And you, you mean fpirited, daftardly wretch, to lend a patient ear to his infamous, improbable tales, equally fhameful both to you and me. Serj. How Madain! have you the affurance Mrs, Cir. Yes, Sir, the affurance that innocence gives; there is not a foul, I thank heaven, that can lay the leaft foil, the leaft fpot, on my virtue; nor is there a man on earth but yourself would have fat and filently liften'd to the fictions and fables of this intemperate fot. Serj. Why to be fure the Knight is overtaken a little ; very near drunk. Sir Luke. I hope he believes it is a lie. [Afide.] Mrs. Cir. Do me inftant juftice on this defamer, this lyar, or never more expect to fee me in your houfe. Serj. I begin to find out the fraud, this is all a flam of the Knight's. Mrs. Cir. I'll drive this inftant to a friend of mine in the Commons, and fee if no fatisfaction can be had, for blafting the reputation of a woman like me-and hark you Sir, what inducement, what devil could prompt ? Serj. Ay; what devil could prompt Sir Luke. Heyday! Mrs. Cir. But I guess at your motive; you flatter'd yourself, that by marrying Charlot, and difcarding of me you should engrofs all his affections and Serj. True, true-ftop, my life, let me come at him, a little hark you, Mr. Knight, I begin to difcover that you are a very fad dog. Sir Luke. Et tu Brute! Serj. Brute !-you'll find I am not the brute you would have made me believe-I have confider'd both fides of the question. F 4 dir Sir Luke. Both fides of the question? Serj. Both if your ftory is true, you are a fcoundrel to debauch the wife of your friend; and if it is falfe, you are an infamous lyar. Sir Luke. Well argued. Serj. So in both cafes, get out of my house. Serj. Troop I tell you, and never again enter these walls you have libelled my wife, and I will fee you no more. Sir Luke. Was there ever fuch a-- Serj. March! and as to my daughter, I would as foon marry her to a forma pauperis client. (Exit Sir Luke. Mrs. Cir. Do you confider, Mr. Circuit, where you are puthing the fellow ?-That chamber is Charlot's. Enter Sir Luke, Woodford, Charlot, and Jack. Sir Luke. Heyday! who the deuce have we here?— Pray walk in, my good folks-your fervant Miss Charlot; your fervant Mr. What-d'ye-call-um-Mr. Serjeant, you need not trouble yourself to cater for Mifs; your family you fee can provide for themselves. Serj. Heyday! What the deuce is all this! Who are you Sir, and how came you here? (To Woodford.) Jack It was I, father, that brought him. Serj. How, firrah! Sir Luke. Well faid my young limb of the law. Jack. Come, let us have none o'your tho' I brought Mr. Woodford, you could not perfuade me to do the fame office for you-father, never ftir if he did not make me the proffer, if I would let him into the houfe the night you was at Kingston, of a new pair of filk ftockings, and to learn me a minuet. Sir Luke. Me! I fhould never have got you to turn out your toes. Jack. Ay, and moreover you made me push out my cheft, and do fo with my fingers, as if I was taking two pinches of fnuff. Sir Sir Luke. You fee, Mr. Serjeant, what a fondnefs, I have for every twig of your family. Serj 1 fhall thank you hereafter-but from you, Charlot, I expected other guess Cbar. When, Sir, you hear this whole matter explain'd, you will acquit I'am fùre. Wood. Indeed, Sir, I am wholly to blame; my being. here was as much a furprize upon Mifs Charlot as Serj. But now you are here, pray what's nefs? 1 your buf Jack. O father, I can acquaint you with thathe wanted me to bring a love letter to Charlot, fo I told him he might bring it himself, for that I would. not do any fuch thing for never fo much, for fear of offending you. །། ་ Serj. You mended the matter indeed-but after all, who, and what are you' u? Jack. It's the young gentleman that lives over our heads, to whom Mr. Fairplay is guardian. A Serj. Who, Woodford Jack. The fame.. Serj. And are you, young man in a fituation to think of a wife?d Wood. I am flattered, Sir, that as juftice is with me, I fhall one day have no contemptible fortune to throw at her feet. Serj. Juftice is! What fignifies juftice ?Is the lar with you, you fool? Erose i Wood. With your help, Sir, I fhould hope for their union, upon this occafion at leaft: -Serj Well, Sir, I fhall re-confider your papers, and if there are probable grounds, I may be induc'd to hear. your propofals. £ Wood. Nay then, Sir, the recovering my paternal poffeffions makes me anxious indeed.-Could I hope that the young lady's good wish would attend me ? Char. I have a father, and can have no will of my own. Sir Luke. So then it feems poor Pil Garlick here is difcarded at once. THE LAME LOVER. Serj. Why, could you have the impudence, after what has happen'd, to hope that Mrs. Cir. He has given wonderful proofs of his modefty. Sir Luke. Be quiet, Mrs. Circuit.Cone, good folks, I will fet all matters to right in a minute; and firft, Mr. Serjeant, it becomes me to tell you, that I never intended to marry your daughter. Serj. How never! Sir Luke. Never. She is a fine girl I allow; but would it now Mr. Serjeant, have been honeft in me, to have robb'd the whole fex of my perfon, and confin'd my favours to her ? Serj. How! Sir Luke. No! I was ftruck with the immorality of the thing; and therefore to make it impoffible that you fhould ever give me your daughter, I invented the story I told you concerning Mrs. Circuit and me. Serj. How! Sir Luke. Truth, upon my honour.-Your wife there will tell you the whole was a lye. Serj. Nay, then indeed. But with what face can I look up to my dear? I have injur'd her beyond the hopes of forgivenefs.-Wou'd you, lovee, but pafs an act of oblivion A Sir Luke. See me here proftrate to implore your clemency in behalf of my friend, Mrs. Cir. Of that I can't determine directly-But, as you feem to have fome fense of your guilt, I fhall grant you a reprieve for the prefent; which contrition and amendment may, perhaps, in time fwell into a par don. But if again offending you are caught, Serj Then let me fuffer, dearee, as I ought. FINI S. |