Let. Truly, madam, you must send this by another messenger: but, pray, what has my master done to deserve it should be sent at all?

Mrs High. He has done nothing yet, I believe, I thank Heaven and my own prudence; but I know what he would do.

Let. He would do nothing but what becomes a gentleman, I am confident...

Mrs High. Oh! I dare swear, madam. Seducing a young lady is acting like a very fine gentleman; but I shall keep my niece out of the hands of such fine gentlemen.

Let. You wrong my master, madam, cruelly; I know his designs on your niece are honourable.

Mrs High. Hussy, I have another match for her she shall marry Mr Oldcastle.

Let. Oh! then, I find it is you that have a dishonourable design on your niece?

Mrs High. How, sauciness!

Let. Yes, madam; marrying a young lady, who is in love with a young fellow, to an old one, whom she hates, is the surest way to bring about I know what, that can possibly be taken.

Mrs High. I can bear this no longer. I would advise you, madam, and your master both, to keep from my house, or I shall take measures you won't like.

[Exit.

But

Let. I defy you! We have the strongest party; and I warrant we'll get the better of you. here comes the young lady herself.

Enter CHARLotte.

Char. So, Mrs Lettice!

Let. Tis pity you had not come a little sooner, madam your good aunt is but just gone, and has left positive orders, that you should make more frequent visits at our house.

Char. Indeed!

Let. Yes, ma'am; for she has forbid my master ever visiting at yours, and I know it will be impossible for you to live without seeing

him.

Char. I assure you! Do you think me so fond, then?

Let. Do I! I know you are: you love nothing else, think of nothing else all day; and, if you will confess the truth, I dare lay a wager, that you dream of nothing else all night.

Char. Then to shew you, madam, how well you know me, the deuce take me if you are not in the right!

Let. Ah! madam, to a woman practised in love, like me, there is no occasion for confession. For my part, I don't want words to assure me of what the eyes tell me. Oh! if the lovers would but consult the eyes of their mistresses, we should not have such sighing, languishing, and despairing, as we have.

Let. It's very lucky that you do meet her here! for her house is forbidden ground-you have seen your last of that, Mrs Highnan swears.

Val. Ha! not go where my dear Charlotte is? What danger could deter me?

Char. Nay, the danger is to be mine-I am to be turned out of doors, if ever you are seen in them again.

Val The apprehensions of your danger would, indeed, put it to the severest proof: but why will my dearest Charlotte continue in the house of one who threatens to turn her out of it? Why will she not know another home; one where she would find a protector from every kind of danger?

Char. How can you pretend to love me, Valentine, and ask me that in our present desperate circumstances?

Let. Nay, nay, don't accuse him wrongfully: I won't, indeed, insist that he gives you any great instance of his prudence by it; but, I'll swear it is a very strong one of his love, and such an instance, as, when a man has once shewn, no woman of any honesty, or honour, or gratitude, can refuse him any longer. For my part, if I had ever found a lover who had not wicked, mercenary views upon my fortune, I should have married him, whatever he had been.

Char. Thy fortune!

Let. My fortune!—Yes, madam, my fortune. I was worth fifty-six pounds before I put into

the lottery; what it will be now I can't tell; but you know somebody must get the great prize, and why not I?

Val. Ob, Charlotte! would you had the same sentiments with me! for, by Heavens! I apprebend no danger but that of losing you; and, believe me, love will sufficiently reward us for all the hazards we run on his account.il

Let list, hist! get you both about your bu siness; Oldcastle is just turned the corner, and if he should see you together, you are undone. [Exeunt VALENTINE and CHARLOTTE.] Now will I banter this old coxcomb severely; for, I think it is a most impertinent thing in these old fellows to interpose in young people's sport.

Enter OLDCASTLE.

Old. Hem, hem! I profess it is a very severe easterly wind, and if it was not to see a sweetheart, I believe I should scarce have stirred abroad all day.. thod

Let. Mr Oldcastle, your very humble servant. Old. Your very humble servant, madam: I ask your pardon; but I profess I have not the honour of knowing you.

Let. Men of your figure, sir, are known by more than they are themselves able to remember; I am a poor handmaid of a young lady of your acquaintance, Miss Charlotte Highman.

Old. Oh! your very humble servant, madam. I hope your lady is well?

Let. Hum! so, so she sent me, sir, of a small message to you.

Old. I am the happiest man in the world! Let. To desire a particular favour of you.! Old, she honours me with her commands. Let. She begs, if you have the least affection for her, that she may never see your face again. Old. What! what?

Let. She is a very well-bred, civil, good-natured lady, and does not care to send a rude message; therefore, only bids ine tell you, she hates you, scorns you, detests you more than any creature upon the earth; that, if you are resolved to marry, she would recommend you to a certain excellent dry nurse; and lastly, she bids me tell you, in this cold weather, never to go to bed without a good warm treacle-posset; and by no means lie without, at least, a pair of flannel waistcoats, and a double flannel night-cap.

Old. Hold your impertinent, saucy tongue! Let. Nay, sir, don't be angry with me, I only deliver my message; and that, too, in as civil and concise a manner as possible.

Old. Your mistress is a pert young hussy; and I shall tell her mother of her.

Let. That will never do; 'tis I am your friend, and if we can get over three little obstacles, I don't despair of marrying you to her, yet. Old. What are those obstacles?

Let. Why, sir, there is, in the first place, your great age; you are at least seventy-five!

it.

Old. It is a lie! I want several months of

Let. If you did not, I think we may get over this: one half of your fortune makes a very sufficient amends for your age.

Old. We shall not fall out about that.

Let. Well, sir; then there is, in the second place, your terrible, ungenteel air; this is a grand obstacle with her, who is doatingly fond of every thing that is fine and foppish; and, yet, I think, we may get over this, too, by the other half of your fortune. And now, there remains but one, which, if you can find any thing to set aside, I believe I may promise you, you shall have her; and that is, sir, that horrible face of yours, which it is impossible for any one to see without being frightened.

:

Old. Ye impudent baggage! I'll tell your mistress!-I'll have you turned off!

Let. That will be well repaying me, indeed, for all the services I have done you. Old. Services!

Let. Services! Yes, sir, services; and to let you see I think you fit for a husband, I'll have you myself! Who can be more proper for a husband, than a man of your age? for, I think you could not have the conscience, nay, the impudence, to live above a year, or a year and half, at most and a good plentiful jointure would make amends for one's enduring you as long as that, provided we live in separate parts of the house, and one had a good handsome groom of the chamber to attend one; though, really, in my opinion, you'd much better remain single, both for your character and constitution. [Exit LET.

Old. Get along, you damned saucy baggage! I thought this cursed easterly wind would blow me no good. I'm resolved I won't stir out again till it changes. [Exit.

SCENE II-A room in VALENTINE's house.

Enter JOHN, meeting VALENTINE. John. Sir, a gentleman desires to see you. Vul. Shew him in. [Exit JOHN.

Enter SLAP.

Val. Your most obedient servant, sir; I have not the honour of knowing you, sir.

Slap. I believe you do not, Sir; I ask pardon, but I have a small writ against you.

Val. A writ against me!

Slup. Don't be uneasy, sir; it is only for a trifle, sir; about 2001.

Val. What must I do, sir?

Slap. Oh, sir! whatever you please! only pay the money, or give bail; which you please.

Val. I can do neither of them this instant, and I expect company every moment. I suppose, sir, you'll take my word till to-morrow morning?

Slap. Oh, yes, sir, with all my heart. If y you will be so good as to step to my house hard by,`

Enter RAKEIT and LETTICE. Rake. You perceive, Mrs Lettice, the strength of my passion, by my frequent visits to you. I saw Oldcastle part from you just now; pray, what has he been entertaining you with?

Let. With his passion for your young mistress, or rather her passion for him. I have been bantering him till he is in such a rage, that I actually doubt whether he will not beat her or no.

Rake. Will you never leave off your frolics, since we must pay for them? You have put him out of humour; now will he go and put my lady out of humour; and, then, we may be all beaten for aught I know.

Let. Well, sirrah! and do you think I had not rather twenty such as you should be beaten to death, than my master should be robbed of his mistress?

Rake. Your humble servant, madam; you need not take any great pains to convince me of your fondness for your master. I believe he has more mistresses than what are in our house; but, hang it, I am too polite to be jealous; and if he has done me the favour with you, why, perhaps, I may return it one day with some body else. I am not the first gentleman of the party-coloured regiment, who has been even with his master.

Let. Why, indeed, masters and their men are often, both in dress and behaviour, so very like, that a woman may be innocently false, and mistake the one for the other. Nay, I don't know whether such a change as you mention may not be sometimes for the better.

Let. She hath, indeed, no fortune of her own; but her aunt Highman is very rich. And then, you know, we've hopes enow! There is hopes of my young master's growing better, for I am sure there is no possibility of his growing worse; hopes of my old master's staying abroad; hopes of his being drowned, if he attempts coming home; hopes of the stars falling

Rake. Dear Mrs Lettice, do not jest with such serious things as hunger and thirst. Do you really think that all your master's entertainments are at an end?

Let. So far from it, that he is this day to give a grand entertainment to your mistress, and about a dozen more gentlemen and ladies.

Rake. My chops begin to water. I find your master is a very honest fellow; and, it is possible, may hold out two or three weeks longer.

Let. You are mistaken, sir; there will be no danger of his giving any more entertainments; for there is a certain gentleman, called an upholsterer, who, the moment that the company is gone, is to make his entrance into the house, and carry every thing out on't.

Rak. A very good way, faith, of furnishing a house to receive a wife in your master has set me a very good pattern against you and I marrying, Mrs Lettice.

Let. Sauce-box! Do you think I'll have you? Rake. Unless I can provide better for myself. Let. Well, that I am fond of thee, I am certain; and what I am fond of, I can't imagine, unless it be thy invincible impudence.

Rake. Why, faith, I think I have the impudence of a gentleman, and there is nothing better to succeed with the ladies.

Let. Yes, yes, and be hanged to you! You know the power you have over us too well; and, though we are thoroughly acquainted with your falschood, yet we are, nine in ten of us, fools enough to be caught.

SCENE I-A square, with VALENTINE's house. Enter GOODALL and servant, with a portmanteau.

LETTICE comes out of the house.

me.

Let. I believe he is half dead already; but now for you, my good master.-[Aside.]-Bless me! What do I see? An apparition!

Good. Lettice!

Let. Is it my dear master, Goodall, returned,

or is it the devil in his shape? Is it you, sir? Is it positively you yourself?

Good. Even so. How do you do, Lettice? Let. Much at your honour's service. I am heartily glad—it really makes me cry-to see your honour in such good health. Why, the air of the Indies hath agreed vastly with you. Indeed, sir, you ought to have staid a little longer there, for the sake of your health-I would to the Lord you had! [Aside. Good. Well; but how does my son do? And how hath he behaved himself in my absence? I hope he hath taken great care of my affairs?

Let. I'll answer for him; he hath put your affairs into a condition that will surprise you.

Good. I warrant you, he is every day in the Alley. Stocks have gone just as I imagined; and if he followed my advice, he must have amassed a vast sum of money.

in.

Let. Not a farthing, sir.
Good. How, how, how!

Let. Sir, he hath paid it out as fast as it came

Good. How!

Let. Put it out, I mean, sir, to interest, to interest. Sir, why, our house hath been a perfect fair ever since you went; people coming for money every hour of the day.

Good. That's very well done; and I long to see my dear boy.-[TO LETTICE.]-Knock at the door..

Let. He is not at home, sir; and if you have such a desire to see him

Enter SECURITY.

Sec. Your servant, Mrs Lettice. Let. Your servant, Mr Security. Here's a rogue of a usurer, who hath found a proper time to ask for his money in! [Aside. Sec. Do you know, Mrs Lettice, that I am weary of following your master, day after day, in this manner, without finding him; and that if he does not pay me to-day, I shall sue out an execution directly. A thousand pounds are a

sum

Good. What, what? what's this I hear? Let. I'll explain it to you by and by, sir? Good. Does my son owe you a thousand pounds?

Sec. Your son, sir!

Good. Yes, sir; this young woman's master, who lives at that house; Mr Valentine Goodall is my son.

Sec. Yes, sir, he does; and I am very glad you are returned to pay it me.

Good. There go two words, though, to that bargain.

Let. I believe, sir, you will do it with a great deal of joy, when you know that his owing this money, is purely an effect of his good conduct.

Good. Good conduct! Owing money good conduct!

Let. Yes, sir; he hath bought a house at the price of two thousand pounds, which every one says is worth more than four; and this he could not have done without borrowing this thousand pound. I am sure, sir, I, and he, and Trusty, ran all over the town to get the money, that he might not lose so good a bargain. He'll pay the money fast enough, now. [Aside.

Good. I am overjoyed at my son's behaviour. Sir, you need give yourself no pain about the money; return to-morrow morning, and you shall receive it.

Sec. Sir, your word is sufficient for a much greater sum; and I am your very humble servant. [Exit SEC. Good. Well, but tell me a little-in what part of the town hath my son bought this house? Let. In what part of the town?

Good. Yes; there are, you know, some quarters better than others-as, for example, this here

Let. But it is not that. Take particular notice of the house opposite to it; a very handsome house, is it not?

Good. Yes; indeed it is.

Let. That is not the house. But you may see one with great gates before it, almost opposite to another that fronts a street; at the end of which stands the house which your son hath bought.

Good. There is no good house in that street, as I remember, but Mrs Highman's. Let. That's the very house.

Good. That is a very good bargain, indeed; but how comes a woman in her circumstances to sell her house?

Let. It is impossible, sir, to account for people's actions; besides, poor dear, she is out of her senses.

Good. Out of her senses !

Let. Yes, sir; her family hath taken out a commission of lunacy against her; and her son, who is a most abandoned prodigal, has sold all she had for half its value.

Good. Son! why she was not married when I went away; she could not have a son.

Let, O yes she could, sir-She's not married, to be sure; but to the great surprise of every