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G U ARDI A N.

IN TWO ACTS.

Br DAVID GARRICK, Ese,

DRAMATIS PERSONE.

ME N.

Drury Lane. Edinburgis. Mr Heartly, the Guardian, Mr Garrick. Mr Woods. Sir Charles Clackil,

Mr Yates. Mr Hollingsworth. Mr Clackit, his Nephew, Mr Obrien.

Mr Knight.
Servant.

TV O MEN.
Miss Harriet, an Heiress, Miss Pritchard. Miss Kirby.
Lucy, the Maid.

Mrs Clive. Mrs Kniveron.

ACT I.

PLE

SCENE, A Hall in Mr Heartly's House.
Enter Sir Charles Clackit, his Nephew, and Servant.

SERVANT.
LEASE to walk this way, Şir.

Sir Cha. Where is your master, friend?
Ser. In his dressing-room, Sir.
7. Cla. Let him know then

Sir Cha. Prithee be quiet, Jack; when I am in com pany, let me direct. 'Tis propers and decent.

ř. Cla. I am dumb, Sir.

Sir Cha. Tell Mr Heartly, his friend and neighbour Sir Charles Clackit would say three words to him. Ser. I shall, Sir

[Exit. А

Sir

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Sir Cha. Now nephew, consider once again, before I open the matter to my neighbour Heartly, what I am going to undertake for you. Why don't you speak?

r. Cla. Is it proper and decent, uncle?

Sir Cha. Pshaw ! don't be a fool- but answer me Don't

you

flatter yourself-What assurance have you that this young lady,

, my friend's ward, has a liking to you? The young fellows of this age are all.cox.combs, and I am afraid you are no exception to the general rule.

r. Cla. Thank you, uncle-But may I this instant be struck old and peevish, if I would put you upon a false scent to expose. you, for all the fine women in Christendom.-I assure you again and again, and you may take my word, uncle, that Miss Harriet has no kind of aversion to your nephew and most humble servant. Sir Cha. Ay, ay,

-vanity! -yanity!- but I never take a young fellow's word about women ; they'll lie as fast, and with as little conscience, as the Brusfels Gazette. Produce your proofs.

r. Cla. Can't your eyes fee 'em, uncle, without urging me to the indelicacy of repeating 'em ?

Sir Cha. Why, “I see nothing but a fool's head and a fool's coat, supported by a pair of most unpromising legs.--Have you no better proofs ?

r. Cla. Yes, I have, my good infidel uncle, half a hundred.

Sir Cha. Out with them then.

r. Gla. First then-Whenever I see her, she never looks at me:

That's a sign of love. Whenever I speak to her, she never answers me:-Another sign of love. And whenever I speak to any body else, she seems to be perfectly easy :That's a certain sign of love. Sir Cha. The devil it is!

r. Cla. When I am with her, she's always grave; and the moment I get up to leave her, then the poor thing begins." Why will

you

Mr Clackit? o can't you sacrifice a few moments to my bashfulness? **--Stay, you agreeable runaway, stay, I shall foon

leave me,

* overcome the fears your presence gives me.”. I could say more---But a man of honour, uncle

Sir Cha. What, and has she said all these things to

you?

r. Cla. O yes, and ten times more—with her eyes.

Sir Gba. With her eyes !--Eyes are very equivocal, Jack.-However, if the young lady has any liking to you, Mr Heartly too much a man of the world, and too much my friend, to oppose the match ; fo do you walk into the garden, and I will open the matter to him.

r. Cla. Is there any objection to my staying, uncle? The business will be soon ended.--You will propose the match, he will give his consent; I shall give mine, Miss is sent for, and l' affair eft fait.

[Snapping his finger. Sir Cha. And so you think that a young beautiful Heiress, with forty thousand pounds, is to be had with a scrap of French, and a snap of your finger.-Prithee get away, and don't provoke me.

r. Cla. Nay, but my dear uncle

Sir Cha. Nay, but my impertinent nephew, either retire, or I'll throw

up
the

game. [Putting bim out. r. Cla. Well, well, I am gone, uncle.- When you come to the point, I shall be ready to make my appearance. —Bon voyage !

[Exit. Sir Cha. The devil's in these young fellows, I think. -We send 'em abroad td cure their sheepishness, and they get above proof the other way.

(Enter Mr Heartly.) -Good-morrow to you, neighbour.

Hea. And to you, Sir Charles; I am glad to see you so strong and healthy.

Sir Chai I can return you the compliment, my friend :-Without flattery, you don't look more than thirty-five; and between ourselves, you are on the wrong side of forty-But mum for that.

Hed. Ease and tranquillity keep me as you see.

Sir Cha. Why don't you marry, neighbour ? A good wife would do well for you.

Hea. For me? You are pleased to be merry, Sir Charles.

Sim

A 2

Sir Cba. No faith, I am serious; and had I a daughter to recommend to you, you should say me nay more than once, I assure you, neighbour Heartly, before I would quit you.

Hea. I am much obliged to you.

Sir Cha. But indeed you are a little too much of the philosopher, to think of being troubled with women and their concerns.

Hea. I beg your pardon, Sir Charles—Tho' there are many who call themselves philosophers, that live fingle, and perhaps are in the right of it, yet I cannot think that marriage is at all inconsistent with true philosophy.- A wise man will resolve to live like the

reft of the world, with this only difference, that he • is neither a llave to passions nor events.'- It is not because I have a little philosophy, but because I am on the wrong fide of forty, Sir Charles, that I desire to be excused. (smiling.)

Sir Cha. As you please, Sir;-and now to my business.--You have no objection, I suppose, to tie up your ward, Miss Harriet, though you have slipped the collar yourself-Ha! ha! ha!

Hea. Quite the contrary, Sir; I. have taken her fome time from the boarding school, and brought her home, in order to dispose of her worthily, with her owa inclination.

Sir Cha. Her father, I have heard you say, recommended that particular care to you, when she had reached a certain age.

Hea. He did faand I am the more desirous to obey bim fcrupulously in this circumstance, as fhe will be a most valuable acquisition to the perfon who shall gain her-for, not to mention her fortune, which is the least confideration, her sentiments are worthy her birth; she is gentle, modeft, and obliging. In a word, my friend, I never saw youth more amiable or discreet--but perhaps I am a little partial to her.

Sir Cha. No, no, she is a delicious creature, every body says so.-But I believe, neighbour, fomething kas happened that you little think of. Hea. What, pray, Sir Charles ?

Sir Cha. My nephew, Mr Heartly --

Enter Young Clackit. 2. Cla. Here I am, at your service, SirMy uncle. is a little unhappy in his manner; but I'll clear the matter in a moment-Miss Harriet, Sir,-- your ward

Sir Cha. Get away, you puppy!

r. Cla. Miss Harriet, Sir, your ward most accomplish'd young lady, to be sure ---

Sir Cha. Thou art a moft accomplish'd coxcomb, to be sure.

Hea. Pray, Sir Charles, let the young gentleman speak.

r. Gla. You'll excuse me, Mr Heartly-My uncle does not set up for an orator—a little confused, or fa, Sir-You see me what I am- -But I ought to ask pardon for the young lady and myself. We are young, Sir-I must conkss we were wrong to conceal it from you-But my uncle, I fee, is pleased to be angry, and therefore I shall say no more at present.

Sir Cha. If you don't leave the room this moment, and stay in the garden till I call you.

7. Cla. I am sorry I have displeased you I did not think it was mal a-propos ; but you

must have your way, uncle-You command—I submit_Mr Heartly, your's.

[Exit Young Clackit. Sir Cha. Puppy! (aside.) My nephew's a little unthinking, Mr Heartly, as you see ; and therefore I have been a little cautious how I have proceeded in this affair: But indeed he has in a manner persuaded me, that your ward and he are not ill together.

Hea. Indeed! This is the first notice I have had of it, and I cannot conceive why Miss Harriet should conceal it from me; for I have often assured her, that I would never oppose her inclination, though I might endeavour to direct it.

Sir Cha. 'Tis human nature, neighbour.--We are fo ashamed of our first passion, that we would willingly hide it from ourselves--But will

you
mention

my nephew to her?

Hea. I must beg your pardon, Sir Charles.—The pame of the gentleman whom she chooses, must first

A 3

come

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