Vhen der oldt lady vishes to run dot masheen, Vhy, I shust let her run id, you see.

Und vhen dot shly Yawcob vas cutting some dricks

(A block off der oldt chip he vas, yaw!)

Ef she goes for dot chap like some dousand off bricks,

Dot's all righdt! She's mine moder-in-law.

Veek oudt und veek in, id vas alvays der same, Dot vomen vos boss off der house;

Budt, dhen, neffer mindt! I vos glad dot she came,

She vas kind to mine young Yawcob Strauss. Und ven dhere vas vater to get vrom der spring Und firevood to shplit oup und saw

She vas velcome to do it. Dhere's not anyding Dot's too good for mine moder-in-law.

CHARLES FOLLEN ADAMS

Dot Long-handled Dipper.

DE
ER boet may sing off "Der Oldt Oaken Bookit,"
Und in schveetest langvitch its virtues may tell;
Und how, vhen a poy, he mit eggsdasy dook it,
Vhen dripping mit coolness it rose vrom der vell.
I don'd take some schtock in dot manner off trinking!
It vas too mooch like horses und cattle, I dink.
Dhere vas more sadisfactions, in my vay off dinking,
Mit dot long-handled dipper, dot hangs py der sink.

"How schveet vrom der green mossy brim to receive it "

Dot vould soundt pooty goot eef it only vas true
Der vater schbills ofer, you petter pelieve it!
Und runs down your schleeve, und schlops indo your
shoe.

Dhen down on your nose comes dot oldt iron handle,
Und makes your eyes vater so gvick as a vink.
I dells you dot bookit it don'd hold a candle
To dot long-handled dipper, dot hangs py der sink.

How nice it musd been in der rough vinter veddher, Vhen it settles righdt down to a coldt, freezing rain,

To haf dot rope coom oup so light as a feddher,
Und findt dot der bookit vas proke off der chain,
Dhen down in der vell mit a pole you go fishing,
Vhile indo your back cooms an oldt-fashioned kink;
I pet you mine life all der time you vas vishing
For dot long-handled dipper, dot hangs py der
sink.

How handy it vas schust to turn on der faucet, Vhere der vater flows down vrom der schpring on der hill!

I schust vas der schap dot vill alvays indorse it

Oxsbecially nighdts vhen der veddher vas chill. Vhen Pfeiffer's oldt vell mit der schnow was all cofered,

Und he vades droo der schnow-drifts to get him a trink,

I schlips vrom der hearth, vhere der schiltren vas hofered,

To dot long-handled dipper, dot hangs py der sink.

Dhen gife oup der bookits und pails to der horses; Off mikerobes und tadpoles schust gife dhem dheir fill!

Gife me dot pure vater dot all der time courses Droo dhose pipes dot run down vrom der schpring on der hill.

Und eef der goot dings off dis vorld I gets rich in,
Und frendts all aroundt me dheir glasses schall clink,
I schtill vill rememper dot oldt coundtry kitchen,
Und dot long-handled dipper, dot hangs py der sink.
CHARLES FOLLEN ADAMS.

Fair Exchange.

Judge.

HIS heart a maiden robbed him of;

So he, in sorest grief,

Brought action in the Court of Love
To prosecute the thief.

And Angels twelve, nor less nor more,
Were summoned, heavenly dears,
For she was to be tried before
A Jury of her peers.

The case was called, and it was proved,
Ere many words were said,

When she the Plaintiff's heart removed

She left her own instead.

"Not guilty!" thus the verdict stands,
"A fair exchange he got."

Judge Love, agreeing, joined their hands
And wed them on the spot.

GEORGE BIRDSEYE.