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you kuow.

Jul. In good truth, not I, sir!

Madam Tyth'em, believing her husband was Squib. No! then so much the better! I war- dead, directly sent the sexon for I.. rant little Pozy does. Well, adieu, my brave Devil. An affectionate wife! boys! for I have not an instant to lose. Nou Lust. Yes ; they are a main happy couple.understand me, hey! Apozem, you do, you Sure as a gun, master, when I comed, his face rogue? What senna, rhubarb, or—hey, can was as black as his cassock: but howsomdever, scour these Sc-Egad, I had like to have I took out my lancelot, and forthwith opened a gone too far! Well, bye, bye! [Erit SQUIB. large artifice here in one of the juglers. The

Jul. Why the poor man seems out of his doctor bled like a pig. senses !

Devil. I dare say. Apo. When be talked of throwing physic to Lust. But it did the business howsomdever; the dogs, I confess I began to suspect him. But I compassed the job. we shall be late ; we must attend our summons, Devil. What, he recovered ?

Last. Recovered! Lord help you! wby, but Jul. Throw physic to the dogs! I can tell last Sunday was se'ennight-to be sure, the docthee, A pozem, if he does not gescured of these tor is given to weeze a little, because why, he is fancies and freaks, he is inore likely to go to the main opulent, and apt to be tisicky-but he kennel by half. Throw physic to the dogs! an composed as sweet a discourse—I slept from impertinent ignorant puppy! [Ereunt. beginning to eud.

Devil. That was composing indeed! Enter Devil, Invoice, and Harriet.

Last. Ay, warn't it, master, for a man that is strucken in


Devil. Oh, a wonderful effort ! Dedil. Well, I think chance has thrown a pretty good sample into your way. Now, if all this I have been telling you, I have a pretty

Lust. Well, like your worship, and besides I could but get one to conduct you—But stay, tight hand at a tooth. who have we here?

Devil. Indeed!

Last. Ay; and I'll say a bold word, that, in Enter Last, with a pair of shoes. drawing a thousand I never stumpt a man in

iny life : now, let your Rusperni's and all your Last. Pray, good gentlemen, can you tell a foreign mounseers, with their fine dainty freechbody which is the ready road to find Warwick-es, say the like if they can. lane ?

Devil. I defy them. Devil. Warwick-lane, friend ! and, pr’ythee, Last. So you may. Then, about a dozen what can be thy errand there?

years ago, before these here Suttons made such Last. I am going there, to take out a licence a noise, I had some thoughts of occupying for to make me a doctor, an like your worship.

the small-pox. Devil. Where do you live?

Devil. Ay; that would have wound up your Last. A little way off in the country, bottom at once. And why did not you ?

Devil. Your name, honest friend, and your Lust. Why, I don't know, master; the neighbusiness?

bours were frightful, and wonld not consent ; Lust. My name, master, is Last; by trade, 1 otherwise, by this time, 'tis my belief, men, woam a doctor, and, by profession, a maker of shoes: men, and children, I might have occupied ewenI was born to the one, and bred up to the other. ty thousand at last.

Devil. Born ! I don't understand you ! Deril. Upon my word ! But, you say a dozen Last. Why, I am a seventh son, and so were years, Master Last? As you have practised phy

sic without permission so long, what makes you Devil. Oh, a very clear title ! and pray, now think of getting a licence ? now in which branch does your skill chiefly lie ? Last. Why, it is all along with one Lotion, a

Last. By casting a water, I cure the jaun- pottercarrier, that lives in a little town hard by darse; I taps folks for a tenpenny; and bave a we; he is grown old and lascivivus, I think, and choice charm for the agar; and over and above threaiens to present nue at size, if so be I practbat, master I bleeds.

tise avy longer. Devil. Bleeds ! and are your neighbours so

Devil. What, I suppose you run away with bold as to trust you ?

the business? Last. Trust me! ay, master, that they will, Last. Right, master ! you have guessed the sooner than narra a man in the country. May- matter at once. So, I was telling my tale to bap, you may know Dr. Tyth'em, our rector, at Sawney M'Gregor, who comes now and then home?

to our town, with his pack; God, he advised me Devil. I can't say that I do.

to get made a doctor at once, and send for a diLast. He's the flower of a man in the pulpit. plunsmy from Scotland. Why, t'other day, you must know, taking a turn Devil. Why, that was the right road, Master in his garden, and thinking of nothing at all, Last. down fulls the doctor-flat in a fit of perplexity : Last. True! But, my master Tych'em tells me,

my father.

that I can get it done for pretty near the same Mac. I canna say that, sir, nor that I am inprice here in London; so I had rather, d’ye see, teerely dastitute neither, but I shall be unco glad lay out my money at home, than transport it to to get a mair solid establishment. foreign parts, as we say; because why, master, Devil. Have you been long in this town? I thinks there has too inuch already gone that Mac. Aboot a month awa, sir: I launded fra road.

Leith, in the guide ship the Traquair, Davy DoDevil . Spoke like an Englishman !

naldson, maister, and am lodged with Sawney Last. I have a pair of shoes here, to carry Sinclair, at the sign o'the city of Glascow, not far home to farmer Fallow's son, tbat lives with Ma- fra the Monument. ster Grogram, the mercer, hard by here, iu Cheap- Devil. But you are in employment? side; so I thought I might as well do both busi- Mac. Ay, for some part of the day. Desses under one.

Devil. "And to what may your profits an, Devil. True! Your way, Master Last, lies be- mount? fore you; the second street you must turn to Muc. Ah, for the matter of that, it is a pratty the left; then, enter the first great gate that smart little income. you see,

Devil. Is it a secret how much? Last. And who must I ask for?

Mac. Not at aw; I get three-pence an hour Devil. Oh, pull out your purse; you will find for larping Latin to a physician in the ceety. that hiot sufficient: It is a part of the world Devil. The very man that we want. Latin ! where a fee is never refused.

and, what, are you capable ? Lust. Thank you, master! You are main Mac. Cappable! Hut awa, mon ! Ken ye, kind; very civil, indeed! (Going, returns.] Ithat I was heed of the humanity-class for mair wish, master, you had now either the agar or than a twalvemonth? and was offered the chair jaundarse; I would set you right in a trice. of the grammatical professorship in the colledge,

Devil. Thank you, Master Last! but I am as which amunts to a matter of sax pounds Britisha well as I am.

a year. Last. Or, if so be you likes to open a vein, or Devil. That's more than I knew. Can you would have a tooth or two knocked out of your guess, sir, where your scholar is now? head, I'll do it for nothing.

Mac. It is na long, sir, that I laft him conning Devil. Not at present, I thank you! when I his As in præsenti ; after which, he talked of want, I'll call at your house in the country.[Erit. ganging to meet some friends o' the faculty, aboot Last.] Well, my young couple, and what say a sort of a squabblc, that he says is sprang up, you now?

amang them; he wanted me to gang alang wi Inv. Say, sir! that I am more afraid of being him, as I had gi'n mysel to study madicine a litsick, than ever I was in my life.

tle before I quitted the north. Devil. Pho! you know nothing as yet. But Devil. Do you know the public-house where my tiine draws nigh for possessing the president; they meet? If I could but get some intelligent person, to Mac. Yes, yes; unco weel, sir; it is at the ta-. conduct you to the place where the licentiates vern the south side of Paul's Kirk. assemble-There seems a sober, sedate-looking Devil. Will you take the trouble to conduct lad; perhaps, be may answer our purpose.- this young couple thither they will amply reHark ye, young man?

ward you. You and your partner will follow

this lad. Fear nothing! by my art, you are inEnter Joury MACPHERSON.

visible to all but those that you desire should see

you. -At the college we shall rejoin one Mac. What's your wul, sir? would you spear Other :- --for thither the licentiates will lead aught wi' me?

you. Devil. Though I think I can give a good Ino. But how shall we be able to distinguish guess, pray, from what part of the world may you from the rest of the fellows ? you come?

Devil. By my large wig, aud superior importMac. My name is Jobney Macpherson, and Iance; in a word, you inust look for me in the came out of the north.

PRESIDENT. Devil. Are you in business at present?

Ino. Adieu !




SCENE I-A Street,

hair? I don't recollect to have seen his features

before. FINGERFEE, Sligo, OSASAFRAS, BROADBRIN, Osas. Nor I, to my knowledge. other Doctors, und MACPHERSON, discovered.

Sli. Perhaps, he may be able to tell me, if I Fin. No; I can't help thinking this was by ask him himself. I am proud to see, you, doca much the best method. If, indeed, they refuse tor, on this occasion; because why, it becomes us an amicable entrance, we are then justified every jontleman that is of the faculty—that is, in the use of of corrosives.

that is not of their faculty, you understand me! Sligo. I tell you, Dr. Fingerfee-I am sorry, to look about him and stir. d'ye see, to differ from so old a practitioner- Mac. Oh, by my troth, you are right, sir! but I don't like your prescription at all, at all; The leemiting of physic aw to ae hoose, caw it For, what signifies a palliative regimen, with a college, or by what denomination you wul, it such a rotten constitution ! May I never fingera is at best but establishing a sort of monopoly. pulse as long as I live, if you get their voluntary Sli. 'Pon my conscience, that is a fine obser. consent to go in, unless, indeed, it be by com- vation. By the twist of your tongue, doctor, (no pulsion.

offence) I should be apt to guess that you might Osas. I entirely coincide with my very capable be a foreigner born. countryman, Dr. Sligo, d'ye sce; and do give Mac. Sirr ! my advice, in this consultation, for putting the Sli. From Russia, perhaps, or Muscovy? whole college under a course of steel without Mac. Hut awa, mon! not at aw! Zounds, I further delay.

am a Breeton ! Sli. I am much obligated to you for your kind Sli. Then, I should suppose, doctor, pretty compliment, doctor. But, pray, what may your far to the northward. name be?

Mac. Ay; you are right, sir. Osas. Dr. Osasafras, at your humble service. Sli. And pray, doctor, what particular branch

Sli. I am your very obadient, alsho! I have of our business may have taken up the most of heard tell of your name. But what did you your time? mane by my countryman? Pray, doctor, of what Mac. Botany. pation are you?

Sli. Botany! in what college?
Osas. Sir, I have the honour to be a native of Mac. The university of St. Andrews.
Ireland ?

Osas. Pray, doctor, is not botany a very dry Sli. Osasafas ? that's a name of no note; he sort of a study? is not a Melisian, I am sure. The family, I sup- Sli. Most damnably so in those parts, my dear pose, came over i'other day with Strongbow, not doctor; for all the knowledge they have, they above seven or eight hundred years ago; or, must get from dried herbs, because the devil of perhaps, a descendant from one of Oliver's any green that will grow there. drummers—’Pon my conscience, doctor, I should Mac. Sir, your information is wrang. hardly belave you were Irish!

Sli. Come, my dear doctor, hold your palaver

, Osas. What, sir, d'ye doubt my veracity? and don't be after puffing on us; because wby,

Sli. Not at all, my dear doctor! it is not for you know in your conscience that in your part that: but, between me, and yourself, you have of the world you get no cabbage but thistles; and lived a long time in this town.

those you are obliged to raise upon hotbeds. Osas. Like enough.

Mac. Thistles ! zounds, sir, d'ye mean to asSli. Ay! and was here a great while before front me? ever I saw it.

Sli. That, doctor, is as you plaases to take it. Osas. What of that?

Mac. God's life, sir, I would ha' you to ken; Sli. Very well, my dear doctor! Then, putting that there is narra a mon wi' bis heed upon his that and t'other together, my notion of the up- shoulders that daresbot is, that if so be you are a native of Ireland, Fin. Peace, peace, gentlemen ! let us have upon my conscience, you must have been born no civil discord. Doctor Sligo is a lover of pleaThere very young.

santry; but, I am sure, had no design to affront Osas. Young? ay, to be sure! Why, my soul, you : A joke, nothing else. I was christened there.

Mac. A joke! ah; I like a joke weel enough; Sli. Ay!

but I did na understand the doctor's gibing and Osas. Ay was I, in the county of Meath. jeering : Perhaps my wut may not be aw to

Sli. Oh, that alters the property! that makes gether as sharp as the doctor's, but I have a it as clear as Fleet-Ditch. I should be glad, sword, sircountryman, of your nearer acquaintance. But Sli. A sword, sir ! what little slim doctor is that, in his own head of| Fin. A sword ! ay, ay; there is no doubt you

bave both very good ones; but reserve them for Sli. Come, Dr. Habakkuk, will you march in -Oh! here comes our ambassador.

the front or rear?

Hab. Pardon me, doctor! I cannot attend you. Enter Drachylon.

Sli. What, d'ye draw back when it comes to

the push ? Well, Dr. Dyachylon, what news from the col- Hab. Not at all; I would gladly join in putlege? will they allow us free ingress and egress? ting these Philistines to fight; for I abhor them

Dyac. I could not get them to swallow a single worse than hog's puddings, in which the unclean demand.

beast and the blood are all jumbled together. All. No?

Sli. Pretty food, for all that. Sli. Tben let us drive there, and drench them. Hab. But this is Saturday; and I dare not Dyac. I was heard with disdain, and refused draw my sword on the Sabbath. with an air of defiance.

Sli. Then stay with your brother MelchiseSli. There, gentlemen! I foretold you what dech; for, though of different religions, you are would happen at first.

both of a kidney. Come, doctors; out with your All. He did, he did !

swords ! Huzza! and now for the lane! Huzza! Sli. Then we have nothing for it but to force

[Ereunt. our passage at once.

Broad. Friend Habakkuk, thou seest how All. By all means; let us march!

headstrong and wilful these men are; but let us Broad. Friend Fingerfee, would our brethren use discretion, however. Wilt thou step to the but incline their ears to me for a minute inn that taketh its name from the city of Lincoln?

Fin. Gentlemen, Dr. Broadbrim desires to be enquire there for a man, with a red rag at his heard.

back, a small black cap on his pate, and a bushel All. Hear him, hear bim !

of hair on his breast ? I think they call him a Sli. Paw, honey, what signifies hearing? I long serjeant. to be doing, my jewel!

Hab. They do. Fin. But hear Dr. Melchisedech Broadbrim,

Broad. Then, without let or delay, bring him however.

hither I


thee. All. Ay, ay; hear Dr. Broadbrim.

Hab. I will about it this instant. Broad. Fellow-labourers in the same vineyard! Broad. His admonition, perhaps, may prevail. ye know well how much I stand inclined to our Use dispatch, I beseech thee, friend Habakkuk. cause; forasmuch as not one of my brethren can Hab. As much as if I was posting to the Treabe more zealous than I

sury, to obtain a large subscription in a new All. True, true.

loan, or a lottery. Broad. But ye wot also that I hold it not meet Broad. Nay, then, friend, I have no reason or wholesome to use carnal weapon, even for to fear thee.

[Exeunt, the defence of myself; much more unseemly, then, must I deem it, to draw the sword for the

SCENE II.- The College. offending of others.

Sli. Paw! brother doctors; don't let him Devil, (as HELLEBORE, the President.] Como bother us with his yea and nay nonsense!

PHIRE, Calomel, Secretary, and Pupils, disBroad. Friend Sligo, do not be choleric; and

covered. know that I am as free to draw my purse, in Sec. The Licentiates, sir, will soon be at band: this cause, as thou art thy sword; And thou Hel. Let them ! pill find, at the length, notwithstanding thy Cal. We will do our duty however; and, like swaggering, that the last will do us best service. the patricians of old, receive with silence these Sli. Well, but

Visigoths in the senate. All. Hear him, hear him!

Hel. I am not, Dr. Calomel, of so pacific a Broad. It is my motion, then, brethren, that turn. Let us keep the evil out of doors, if we we do forthwith send for a sinful man in the can: if not, vim vi, repel force by force-Barriflesh, called an attorney.

cado the gates! Sli. An attorney!

Sec. It is done. Broad. Ay, an attorney; and that we do direct Hel. Are the buckets and fire-engine fetched him to take out a parchinent instrument, with a from St. Dunstan's ? seal fixed thereto.

Sec. They have been here, sir, this half-hour. Sli. Paw, pox! what good can that do? Hel. Let twelve apothecaries be placed at the

Broad. Don't be too hasty, friend Sligo. And pump, and their apprentices supply them with therewith, I say, let himn possess the outward ta- water. bernacle of the vain man, who delighteth to call Sec. Yes, sir. himself president, and carry him before the men Hel. But let the engine be played by old Jolclothed in lambskin, who, ‘at Westminster, are lup, from James-street. Not one of the trade Dow sitting in judgment.

has a better hand at directing a pipe. Sli. Paw! å law-suit! that won't end with Sec. Mighty well, sir. our lives. Let us march!

Hel. In the time of siege, every citizen ought All. Ay, ay.

in duty to serve. Having thus, brotliers, provid

ed a proper defence, let us coolly proceed to our called in to a patient with a pain in his bowels, business. Is there any body here, to demand a what then is your method of practice? licence to-day?

Last. I claps a trencher hot to the part. Sec. A practitioner, Mr. President out of the Hel. Embrocation; very well! But if this country.

application should fail, what is the next step that Hel. Are the customary fees all discharged? you take? Sec. All, sir.

Last. I gi's a vomit and a purge. Hel. Then let our censors, Dr. Christopher Hel. Well replied ! for it is plain there is a Camphire, and Dr. Cornelius Calomel, introduce disagreeable guest in the bouse; he has opened the practitioner for examination.

both doors; if he will go out at neither, it is [Ereunt CAMPHIRE and CALOME.L. none of his fault. After this duty is dispatched, we will then read All. Oh, no! by no means ! the college and students a lecture.

Hel. We have now dispatched the riddle, and

head: Coine we finally to the other extremity, Enter CamPuigE and CaLomel, with Last.

the feet! Are you equally skilful in the disorders Last. First, let me lay down my shoes. incidental to them?

(They adrance, with three bows, to the table. Last. I believe I may. Hel. Let the candidate be placed on a stool.

Hel. Name some. What's the doctor's name?

Last. I have a great vogue all our way for Sec. Emanuel Last, Mr. President.

curing of corns. Hel. Dr. Last, you have petitioned the college, Hel

. What are the means that you use? to obtain a licence for the practice of physic; Last. I cuts them out. and though we have no doubt of your great skill Hel. Well replied ! extirpation : No better and abilities, yet our duty compels us previously method of curing can be. 'Well, brethren, I to ask a few questions : What academy had the think we may now, after this strict and impartial honour to form you?

inquiry, safely certify, that Dr. Last, from top to Last. Anan?

toe, is an able physician. Hel. We want to know the name of the place All. Very able, very able, indeed! where you have studied the science of physic? Hel. And every way qualified to proceed in Last, Dunstable.

his practice. Hel. That's some German university; so he Àll. Every way qualified. can never belong to the College.

Hel. You may descend, Dr. Last. (Last takes All. Never ; oh, no!

his seut among them.] Secretary, first read, and Hel. Now, sir, with regard to your physiolo- then give the doctor bis licence. gical knowledge. By what means, Dr. Last, do Sec. [Reads.] " To all whom these presents you discover that a man is not well?

may come, greeting. Know ye, that, after Lust. By his complaint that he is ill. most strict und severe inquisition, not only into Hel. Well replicd! no surer prognostic. the great skill and erudition, but the morals of All. None surer.

Dr. Emanuel Last. We are authorised to grant Hel. Then, as to recovering a subject that is unto the said doctor, full power, permission, ill-Can you venture to undertake the cure of and licence, to pill, bolus, lotion, potion, druught, an ague?

dose, drench, purge, bleed, blister, clister, cup, Lust. With arra a man in the country. scarify, syringe, salivate, couch, flur, sweet, Hel. By what means?

diet, dilute, tap, plaster, and poultice, all-perLast. By a charm.

sons, in all diseases, of all ages, conditions, and Hel. And pray, of what materials may that seres. And we do strictly command and enjoin charm be composed ?

all surgeons, apothecaries, with their apprentiLast. I wont tell ; 'tis a secret.

ces, all midwives, male, female, and nurses, at Hel. Well replied ! the college has no right all times, to be aiding and assisting to the said to pry into secrets.

Dr. Emanuel Last. And we do further charge All. Oh, no! by no means !

all mayors, justices, aldermen, sheriffs, bailifs, Hel. But now, Dr. Last, to proceed in due headboroughs, constables, and coroners, not to form; are you qualified to administer remedies molest or intermeddle with the said doctor

, if to such diseases as belong to the head ? any party whom he shall pill, bolus, lotion, po Last. I believe I may.

tion, draught, dose, drench, purge, bleed, blis Hel. Nanie some to the college.

ter, clister, cup, scarify, syringe, salitate, coruch, · Last. The tooth-ache.

Aur, sweat, diet, dilute, tap, plaster, and poulHel. What do you hold the best method to tice, should happen to die, but to deem that treat it?

the said party died a natural death, anything Last. I pulls 'em up by the roots.

appearing, to the contrary notwithstanding. Hel. Well replied, brothers ! that, without Given under our hands, &c.” Hercules Helledoubt, is a radical cure.

bore, Cornelius Calomel, Christopher Camphire. All. Without doubt.

Last. Then, if a patient die, wiey must not Hel. Thus far as to the head: proceed we say that I killed hiin? next to the middle; When, Dr. Last, you are Hel. They say? Why, how should they know,

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