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forts of matrimony, and not be troubled with its Sharp. Oh, pray, sir, have supper first; or inconveniences— iV hat say you, Kitty?
I'm sure I shan't live till the dance is finished. Kitty. Do you hear, Sharp? before you
talk Guy. Behold, Melissa, as sincere a convert of the comforts of matrimony, taste the com- as ever truth and beauty made. The wild impeforts of a good dinner, and recover your flesh a tuous sallies of my youth are now blown over, little ; do, puppy.
and a most pleasing calm of perfect happiness Sharp. The devil backs her, that's certain ! succeeds. and I ain no match for her at any weapon.
Mel. And now, Mr. Gayless, to show I have Thus Ætna's fames the verdant earth connot provided for you by halves, let the music sume, prepare themselves, and, with the approbation But milder heat makes drooping nature bloom; of the company, we'll have a dance.
Su virtuous love affords us springing joy, All, By all means a dance !
Whilst vicious passions, as they burn, destroy. Gut. By all means a dance-after supper,
[Ereunt omnes. though,
SCENE I.-& sireet.
her aunt were removed to town, and lived some
where near this part of it. Enter Captain Lovers and PUFF, Puff. And now we are got to the place of
action, propose your plan of operation. Capt. This
is the place we were directed to; Capt. My father lives in the next street, so and now, Puff, if I can get no intelligence of I must decamp immediately, for fear of disher, what will become of me?
coveries : you are not known to be my servant; Puff. And me 100, sir?-You must consider go, make what inquiries you can in the veighI am a married man, and can't bear fatigue as I bourhood, and I shall wait at the ion for your have done. But, pray, sir, why did you leave intelligence. the arıny so abruptly, and not give me time to Puff. I'll patrol hereabouts, and examine fill my knapsack with common necessaries ! all that pass; but I have forgot the word, sirHalf a dozen shirts, and your regimentals, are Miss Biddymy whole cargo.
Capt. BellairCapt. I was wild to get away; and as soon Puff. A young lady of wit, beauty, and fifas I obtained my leave of absence, I thought teen thousand pounds fortune-But, sirevery moment an age till I returned to the Capt. What do you say, Puff? place where I first saw this young, charming, in- Puff: If your honour pleases to consider, nocent, bewitching creature. I did so; but we that I had a wife in town whom I left somefouud the house was shut up; and all the in- what abruptly balf-a-year ago, you'll think it, formation, you know, that we could get from I believe, but decent to make some inquiry the neighbouring cottage was, that iniss and after her first: to be sure it would be some
small consolation to me to know whether the Jas. Not absolutely; the girl, I believe, depoor woman is living, or has made away with tests him; but her aunt, a very good, prudent herseli, or
old lady, has given her consent, if he can get her Cant. Pr'ythee don't distract me; a mo- niece's: how it will end, I can't tell—but I'ın hot ment's delay is of the utmost consequence; upon't myself. I must insist upon an immediate compliance Puff. The devil! not marriage, I hope? with my commands,
(Erit CAPTAIN. Jas. That is not yet determined. Putt The devil's in these fiery young lel- Puff. Who is the lady, pray? lows ! they think of nobody's wants but their Jas. A maid in the sanje family; a woman own. He does not consider that I am flesh of honour, I assure you. She has one husband and blood as well as himself. However, I inay already, a scoundrel sort of a fellow, that has killewo birds at once: for I shan't be surprised run away from her, and listed for a soldier; so, if I meet my lady walking the streets-But, towards the end of the campaign, she hopes to who have we here? Sure I should know that have a certificate he's knocked o' the head : face.
if not, I suppose, we shall settle matters anEnter JASPER from a house.
Puff. Well, speed the plough !—But hark ye?
consummate without the certificate if you canWho's that? my old acquaintance Jasper ! keep your neck out of the collar-do-I have Jas. What, Puff! are you here?
wore it these two years, and damnably galled Putf. My dear friend! Well, and now, Jas- I am. per, still easy and happy ? Toujours le même ! Jas. I'll take your advice ; but I must run What intrigues now? What girls have you away to my master, who will be impatient for ruined, and what cuckolds made, since you an answer to his message, which I have just and I used to beat up together, eh?
delivered to the young lady: so, dear Mr. Puff, Jas. Faith, business has been very brisk I am your most obedient humble servant. during the war; men are scarce, you know : Puff. And I must to our agents for my not that I can say I ever wanted amusement arrears : if you have an hour to spare, you'll in the worst of times—But hark ye, Puff- hear of me at George's, or the Tilt-yard - Au
Puff. Not a word aloud; I am incognito. revoir, as we say abroad. (Erit Jasper.] Thus,
Jas. Why, faith, I should not have known we are as civil and as false as our betters : you, it you had not spoke first; you seem to be Jasper and I were always the beau monde exa litle dishabille too, as well as incognito. actly; we ever hated one another heartily, yet Whom do you honour with your service now? I always kiss and shake hands---But now to my Are you froin the wars?
master, with a lead full of news, and a heart full Putt: Piping hot, I assure you; fire and smoke of joy!
(Going, starts. will taroish: a man that will go into such service as I have been in, will find his clothes the Angels and ministers of grace defend me! worse for the wear, take my word for it. But It can't be! By Heavens, it is, that fretful porhow is it with you, friend Jasper! What, you cupine, my wife! I can't stand it? what shall still serve, I see you live at that house, 1 I do?-lil try to avoid her. Suppose? Jas. I don't absolutely live, but I am most
Enter Tag. of my tiine there. I have, within these two Tay. It must be he! I'll swear to the rogue at mouths, entered into the service of an old gen- a mile's distance : he either has not seen me, man, who hired a reputable servant, and dressed or won't know me. If I can keep my temper, im as you see, because he has taken it into his I'll try him farther. lead to fall in love.
Puff. I sweat !-I tremble !-She comes Puff: False appetite, and second childhood ! upon me ! Bat, pr’ythee, what's the object of his passion? Tag, Pray, good sir, if I may be so bold Jas. No less than a virgin of sixteen I can Puff. I have nothing for you, good woman;
don't trouble me. Puff. Oh, the toothless old dotard !
Tag. If your honour pleases to look this Jas. And he mumbles and plays with her till waybis inoutb waters; then he chuckles till he crics, Putt. The kingdom is overrun with beggars. and calls her his Bid and his Bidsy; and is so I suppose the last I gave to has sent this : but I foolishly fond
have no more loose silver about me: so, pr’ythee, Putf Bidsy! what's that?
wornan, don't disturb me. Jas. Her name is Biddy.
Tug. I can hold no longer. Oh, you villaio, Puf Biddy! What, Miss Biddy Bellair? you? where have you been, scoundrel? Do Jas. The same
you know me now, varlet?
(Seizes him. Puff. I bave no luck, to be sure. [Aside.)- Putf. Here, watch, watch! Zounds, I shall Oh, I have heard of her; sbe's of a pretty good have my pockets picked! family, and has some fortune, I koow. But are Tag. Own me this minute lang-dog, and conthugs settled? Is the marriage fixedd?
fess every thing, or, by the rage of an injured
woman, I'll raise the neighbourhood, throttle lady, and the old gentleman may go to the you, and send you to Newgate!
devil. Pufi: Amazement! what, my own dear Tay! Tag. Heyday! what's all this? Come to iny arms, and let me press you to my Puff. Say no more; the dice are thrown heart, that pants for thee, and only thee, my doublets for us : away to your young mistress, true and lawful wife ! Now my stars have while I run to my master. 'Tell ber Rhodophil, overpaid me for the fatigue and dangers of Rhodophil will be with her immediately; then, the field. I wandered about, like Achilles, if her blood does not mount to her face, like in search of faithful Penelope: and the gods quicksilver, in a weather-glass, and point to have brought me to this happy spot.
extreme hot, believe the whole a lie, and your
[Embraces her. husband no politician. Tug. The fellow's crackt for certain : Leave Tag. This is news indeed! I have had the your bombastic stuff, and tell me, rascal, why place but a little while, and have not quite got you left me, and where you have been these into the secrets of the family: but part of your six months, hel?
story is true; and if you bring your master, and Puff. We'll reserve my adrentures for our miss is willing, I warrant we'll be too hard for happy winter evenings-1 shall only tell you the old folks. now, that my heart beat so strong in my coun- Puft. I'll about it straight---But, hold, Tag; try's cause, and being instigates either by ho- I had forgot-Pray how does Mr. Jasper do? nour or the devil (I can't tell which) I set out Tag. Mr. Jasper?-What do you mean? I-for Flanders to gather laurels, and lay them at I-Iihy feet.
Puff. What! out of countenance, child? Tag. You left me to starve, villain, and beg O fie! speak plain, my dear And the certimy bread, you did so.
ticate; when comes that, eh, love? Puff. I left you too hastily, I must confess; Tag. He has sold himself, and turned conand often has iny conscience stung me for it- jurer, or he could never have known it. I am got into an officer's service, have been in
[ Aside. scveral actions, gained some credit by my beha- Putt. Are you not a jade ?-are you not a viour, and am now returned with my master to Jezebel ?-arn't you aindulge the gentler passions.
Tag. O ho! temperance, or I walk off. Tay. Don't think to fob me off with this non- Puff. I know I am not finished yet, and so I sensical talk. What have you brought me home am easy; but more thanks to my fortune than besides?
your virtue, madam. Puff. Honour, and immoderate love. Bid. [Within] Tag, Tag! where are you, Tag. I could tear your eyes out!
Tag? Pujt. Temperance, or I walk off.
Tag. Coming, madam !- My lady, calls Tug. Tenperance, traitor! temperance ! away to your master, and I'll prepare his reWhat can you say for yourself? Leave me to ception within. the wide world!
Puff. Shall I bring the certificate with me? Puff: Well, I have been in the world too, han't I? What would the woman bave?
Tag. Go, you graceless rogue ! you richly Tag. Reduce me to the necessity of going to deserve it.
[Cries. Puff: Why, I'ın in service too, your lord
SCENE II.--A chamber. and master, an't I, you saucy jade, you?Come, where dost live? bere about? Hast got
Enter BIDDY. good vails ? Dost go to market? Come, give me a kiss, darling, and tell me where I shall pay my Bid. How unfortunate a poor girl am I! dare duty to thee.
not tell my secret to any body; and, it I don't, Tag. Why, there I live, at that house. I'm undone-Heigh hó! Sighs.) Pray, Tag,
[Pointing to the house Jasper came is my aunt gone to her lawyer abont melout of.
Ileigh bo! Puff. What! there! that house?
Tag. What's that sigh for, my dear young Tay. Yes, there ; that house.
mistress? Putt: Buzza! we're made for ever, you slut Bid. I did not sigh, not I
(Sighs. you; huzza ! every thing conspires this day to Tag. Nay, never gulp them down; they make me happy! Prepare for an inundation of are the worst things you can swallow. There's joy? My master is in love with your Miss Biddy something in that little heart of yours, that over bead and cars, and she with him. I know swells it, and pufis it, and will burst it at last, she is courted by some old rumbler, and her if you don't give it vent. aunt is not against the match; but now we are Bid. What would you have inc tell you? come, the town will be relieved, and the go
Sighs. vernor brought over: in plain English, our Tag. Come, come, you are afraid I'll hufortune is made; my master inust marry the tray you: but you had as good speak; I
may do you some service you little think Tag. Is that all, my dear? Mighty simple, of,
[Aside. Bid. It is not in your power, Tag, to give Bid. One of them is a fine blustering man, me what I want.
[Sighs. and so called captain Flash; he's always talkTag. Not directly, perhaps ; but I may be the ing of fighting and wars : he thinks he's sure means of helping you to it. As for example-of me; but I shall baulk him : we shall see if you should not like to marry the old man him this afternoon, for he pressed strongly your annt designs for you, one may find a way to come; and I have given him leave, while to break
my aunt is taking her afternoon's nap. Bid. Ilis neck, Tag?
Tag. And who is the other pray? Pag. Or the match; either will do, child. Bid. Quite another sort of a He
Bid. I don't care which, indeed, so I was speaks like a lady for all the world, and never clear of him I don't think I am fit to be swears as Mr. Flash does, but wears nice white married
gloves, and tells me what ribbons become my Tog. To him you mean! You have no objec- complexion, where to stick my patches, who inno marriage, but the man; and I applaud is the best milliner, where they sell the best pou for it. But come, courage, miss; never tea, and which is the best wash for the face, keep it in: out with it ali.
and the best paste for the hands; he is always B :1. If you'll ask me any questions, I'll an- playing with my fan, and shewing his teeth! swer them; but I can't tell you any thing of and whenever I speak, he pats me--so-and mt:cif; I shall blush if do.
crics, “The devil take me, Miss Biddy, but Tug. Well, then; in the first place, pray you'll be my perdition !-ha, ha, ha! teil me, Miss Biddy Bellair, if you don't like Tag Oh, the pretty creature! And what do somebad, better than old sir Simon Loveit ? you call him, pray? Bid. Heivh ho!
Bid. His name is Fribble: you shall see him, Tu G. What's heigh ho, miss ?
too; for, by mistake, I appointed them at the Bid. When I say beígh ho, it means yes. same time: but you must help me out with them.
Tug. Very well: and this somebody is a Tag. And suppose your favourite should young handsome tellow? Bid. Heigh ho !
Bid. I should not care what became of the Tag. And if you were once his, you'd be as others. merry as the best of us?
Tag. What's his name? Bid. Heigl, ho!
Bid. It begins with R--Tum. Si far so good! and since I have got Tag. I'll be hanged if it is not Rhodophil!
to wet your feet, souce over head at once, Bid. I am frightened at you! You're a a'r the rain will be over.
witclı, Tag. Bid. There-then. [11 long sigh.] Now, help Tag. I am so; and I can tell your forthe out, Tag, as fast as you can,
lune, too. Look me in the face. 1. When did you hear from your gallant? tleman you love most in the world, will be Bil. Never since he went to the arıny. at our house this afternoon : be arrived from Ta How so?
the army this morning, and dies till be sees B. I was afraid tlic letters would fall into you. tay aunt's hands, so I would not let him write Bid. Is he come, Tag? Don't joke with losue: but I had a better reason then. Tag. Pray, let's hear that, too.
Bid. Not to keep you longer in suspence, Ps. Wny, I thought if I should write to him, you must know the servant of your Strephon, 2 promise bio to love nobody else, and I by some unaccountable fate or other, is my rould afterwards change my mind, he might lord and masier: he has just been with me, tak I was inconstant, and call me a co- told me of bis master's arrival and impaite.
tience 142. What a simple innocent it is !! Bid. Oh, my dear, dear, Tag, you have put
Isite.)- And have you changed your mind, me out of my wits—I am all over in a flutwie?
I shall leap out of my skin-I don't Bid. No, indeed, Tag; I love him the best know what to do with myself! Is he come, of any of them.
Tag? I am ready to faint--I would give the Tec. Of any of them! Why, have you any world I had put on my pink and silver robings iare?
to-day. Bid. Pray, don't ask me.
Tag. I assure you, iniss, you look charmlag. Nay, miss, if you only trust me by ingly, ***C, you can't expect
Bid. Do I, indecil, though? I'll put a little kid. I will trust you with every thing. When patch under my left eye, and powder my hair 13ted with bim, I grew melancholy'; so, in immediately. t'ler to divert me, I have let two others court Tag. I'cll, go to dinner first, and then I'll los, tall lie return again.