his own. By that time he has spent an hour at Will's, or the Chocolate-House, 'tis almost time for the Play; and having put himself in Order, adjusted his Cravat and Wig, and daub'd his Face with Snuff, he very soberly enters the House; first in one side Box, then in t'other; next in the Pit, and sometimes in the Galleries, that the Vulgar sort may as well behold and admire the Magnificence of his Apparel, as those of Quality: Before the Play's half done, whip he's at t'other House, and being in the Pit, between every Act leaps upon the Benches, to show his Shape, his Leg, his Scarlet Stockings, his Meen and Air; then out comes a Snuff-Box, as big as an Alderman's Tobacco-Box, lin'd with a bawdy Picture, and the Hand's very gracefully lifted to the Nose, to shew the length of its Fingers, its whiteness, its delicacy, and the Diamond Ring; and having play'd a few Monkey Tricks, the Musick ceases, and the Gentleman descends, bowing this way, that way, and t'other way, that the Ladies in the Boxes may take notice of him, and think him a Person of Quality, known and respected by every body: Then, while the Play's Acting, he turns his Back to the Stage, as disregarding such Nonsense; and crying, Damme, here's a dam'd Play; then speaking to a Masque Madam, says he, How can your Ladyship sit it? Why, Sir, says she? Methinks 'tis very tolerable; O ged Madam! no, the Devil take me if I cou'dn't write a more tolerable one ex Tempore: But if she still persists to commend it, and will needs confute him, as O dear Sir! I'm sure you wrong your Judgment now, this Scene is very pretty, and witty; then the Fop complies a little, and, with a simple

A NICE, AFFECTED BEAU

339

Grimace, He! He! Why faith, Madam, this is indifferent, though if such a thing had been out or in, 'twou'd ha' been much better; still criticising, and pretending to amend what he does not understand: When an Hour or two's spent there, he goes to the Park, and, creeping to a Lady, O Madam, I'm almost suffocated; stop my Vitals! the Smoak of London is unsufferable: How does your Ladyship find it? yet, not permitting her to Answer; O Madam, renounce me, if I am not ready to expire; your Ladyship's most humble Servant: Then the same Stuff to another, always endeavouring to speak Fine, and Unintelligibly; and, not being Master of his own Language, intermixes it with Bombast Latine, and scraps of French, that the Ladies may take him for a Man of Parts, and a true Linguist: When he has pretty well wearied himself with that Diversion, he walks to some Lady's Lodgings in Pell-Mell, or St. James's-Square; where he spends three or four Hours at Ombre, or Ticktack, and so Home again.

A LADY

An Essay in Defence of the Female Sex.

inserted the Characters of

In which are

In a Letter to a Lady. Written by a Lady. . . . London,... 1696.

9 characters.

8°.

This book has an interest beyond itself. It belongs to a large group of books and pamphlets which formed part of the reaction against the Restoration attitude to women. This movement began in France, and many of the English works were translations. No French source has been discovered for the present essay,1 whose authorship is uncertain.

Whoever the writer may be, she can express her satirical attitude brightly, and with a thoughtful wit. She uses the characters to amplify points in her argument. The 'Pedant' and the Country Squire,' for instance, are given to shew that Men may and do often Baffle and Frustrate the Effects of a liberal Education, as well by Industry as Negligence.' And she proceeds to discuss this matter with much good sense.

A Country Squire

THESE are generally sent to School in their Minority, and were they kept there till they came to Years of Discretion, might most of 'em stay, till they cou'd tuck their Beards into their Girdles before they left carrying a Satchel. In conformity to Custom, and the Fashion, they are sent early to serve an Apprenticeship to Letters, and for eight or nine years are whipt up and down through two 1A. H. Upham, Journal of English and Germanic Philology, vol. 12, pp. 262-76. 1913.

A COUNTRY SQUIRE

341 or three Counties from School to School; when being arriv'd at Sixteen, or Seventeen Years of Age, and having made the usual Tour of Latin and Greek Authors, they are call'd Home to be made Gentlemen. As soon as the young Squire has got out of the House of Bondage, shaken off the awe of Birch, and begins to feel himself at Liberty, he considers that he is now Learned enough, (and 'tis ten to one but his Friends are wise enough to be of his Opinion) and thinks it high time to shake off the barbarous Acquaintance he contracted, with those crabbed, vexatious, obscure Fellows, that gave him so much trouble and smart at School, Companions by no means fit for a Gentleman, that writ only to torment and perplex poor Boys, and exercise the tyranny of Pedants and School-masters. These prudent resolutions taken, his Conversation for some years succeeding is wholly taken up by his Horses, Dogs and Hawks (especially if his Residence be in the Country) and the more sensless Animals that tend 'em. His Groom, his Huntsman, and his Falconer are his Tutors, and his walk is from the Stable to the Dogkennel, and the reverse of it. His diversion is drudgery, and he is in highest satisfaction when he is most tir'd. He wearies you in the Morning with his Sport, in the Afternoon with the noisie Repetition and Drink, and the whole Day with Fatigue and Confusion. His Entertainment is stale Beer, and the History of his Dogs and Horses, in which he gives you the Pedigree of every one with all the exactness of a Herald; and you be very much in his good Graces, 'tis odds, but he makes you the Compliment of a Puppy of

if

one of his favourite Bitches, which you must take with abundance of Acknowledgments of his Civillity, or else he takes you for a stupid, as well as an ill bred Fellow. He is very constant at all Clubs and Meetings of the Country Gentlemen, where he will suffer nothing to be talk'd or hear'd of but his Jades, his Curs, and his Kites. Upon these he rings perpetual Changes, and trespasses as much upon the patience of the Company in the Tavern, as upon their Enclosures in the Field, and is least impertinent, when most drunk. His grand Business is to make an Assignation for a Horse Race, or a Hunting Match, and nothing_discomposes him so much as a Disappointment. Thus accomplish'd, and finish'd for a Gentleman, he enters the Civil Lists, and holds the Scale of Justice with as much Blindness as she is said to do. From hence forward his Worship becomes as formidable to the Ale-Houses, as he was before Familiar; he sizes an Ale Pot, and takes the dimensions of Bread with great Dexterity and Sagacity. He is the terrour of all the Deer, and Poultry Stealers in the Neighbourhood, and is so implacable a Persecutor of Poachers, that he keeps a Register of all the Dogs and Guns in the Hundred, and is the Scare-Beggar of the Parish. Short-Pots, and unjustifiable Dogs and Nets, furnish him with sufficient matter for Presentments, to carry him once a Quarter to the Sessions; where he says little, Eats and Drinks much, and after Dinner, Hunts over the last chace, and so rides Worshipfully Drunk home again. At home he Exercises his Authority in granting his Letters Pattents to Petitioners for erecting Shovel Board, Tables and Ginger Bread Stalls. If he