Glendowery, prime minister to king Malcolm the first.

I. Fun. And are all the parties agreed?

Z. Fun. I can't fay quite all; for the right honourable peer that is to be my papa, (who by the bye) is as proud as the devil, has flatly renounced the alliance, calls me here in his letter Plebeian, and fays if we have any children, they will turn out very little better than pye balls.

I. Fun. And what does the gentlewoman fay? Z. Fun. The gentlewoman! Oh, the gentlewoman, who (between ourselves) is pretty near as high as her father; but, however, my perfon has proved too hard for her pride, and I take the affair to be as good as concluded.

I. Fun. It is refolved?

Z. Fun. Fixed.

I. Fun. I am forry for it.

Z. Fun. Why fo? come, come, brother Ifaac, don't be uneafy, I have a fhrewd guess at your grievance; but though you may not be fuffered to fee lady Sachariffa at firft, yet who knows before long I may have intereft enough with her to bring it about; and in the mean time you may dine when you will with the fteward.

I. Fun. You are exceedingly kind.

Z. Fun. Mrs. Mechlin, you don't think my lady will gainsay it?

Mrs. Mech. By no means; it is wonderful confidering her rank, how mild and condefcending fhe is why, but yesterday, fays her ladyship to me, Though, Mrs. Mechlin, it can't be fuppofed that I fhould admit any of the Fungus family into my prefence

Z. Fun. No, no, to be fure; not at first, as I faid.

Mrs.

Mrs. Mech. Yet his brother or any other relation, may dine with the fervants every day.

Z. Fun. Do you hear, Ifaac, there's your true, inherent nobility, fo humble and affable; but people of real rank never have any pride; that is only for upstarts.

İ. Fun. Wonderfully gracious; but here, brother Zac. you mistake me, it is not for myself I am forry.

Z. Fun. Whom then?

1. Fun. For you. Don't you think that, your wife will defpife you?

Z. Fun. No.

I. Fun. Can you fuppofe that you will live to gether a month?

Z. Fun. Yes.

I. Fun. Why, can you bear to walk about your own houfe like a paltry dependant?

Z. Fun. No.

I. Fun. To have yourself and your orders contemned by your fervants?

Z. Fun. No.

I. Fun. To fee your property devoured by your lady's beggarly coufins, who, notwithstanding, won't vouchfafe you a nod ?

Z. Fun. No.

1. Fun. Can you be blind at her bidding, run at her fending, come at her calling, dine by yourfelf when she has bettermoft company, and fleep fix nights a week in the garret ?

Z. Fun. No.

I. Fun. Why, will you dare to disobey, have the impudence to difpute the fovereign will and pleasure of a lady like her?

Z. Fun. Ay, marry will I.

I. Fun. And don't you expect a whole clan of
C

Andrew

Andrew Ferraros, with their naked points at your throat?

Z. Fun. No.

I. Fun. Then you don't know half have to go through.

you will Z. Fun. Look you, brother, I know what you would be at; you don't mean I should marry at all.

I. Fun. Indeed, brother Zachary, you wrong me; I fhould with pleasure fee you equally matched, that is, to one of your own rank and condition.

Z. Fun. You would? I don't doubt it, but that is a pleasure you never will have. Look you, Ifaac, I have made up my mind; it is a lady I like, and a lady I will have; and if you fay any more, I'll not be contented with that, for damme, I'll marry a duchefs.

Enter LA FLEUR.

La Fleur. Le Maitre pour donner d'eloquence. : Z. Fun. What does the puppy fay, Mrs. Mechlin? for you know I can't parler vous.

Mrs. Mech. The gentleman from the city, that is to make you a fpeaker.

Z. Fun. Odzooks! a fpecial fine fellow, let's

have him.

Mrs. Mech. Faites l'entrer.

[Exit La Fleur. I. Fun. Brother, as you are busy, I will take

another

Z. Fun. No, no, this is the finest fellow of all, it is he that is to make me a man; and hark ye, brother, if I fhould chance to rife in the ftate, no more words, your bufinefs is done.

I. Fun. What, I reckon fome member of liament.

par

Z. Fun.

Z. Fun. A member! Lord help you, brother Ifaac, this man is a whole fenate himself. Why it is the famous orationer that has published the book.

I. Fun. What, Mr. Gruel.

Z. Fun. The fame.

I. Fun. Yes, I have feen his name in the News.

Z. Fun. His knowledge is wonderful; he has told me fuch fecrets: why do you know, Ifaac, by what means 'tis we speak?

I. Fun. Speak! why we speak with our mouths.
Z. Fun. No, we don't.

I.. Fun. No!

Z. Fun. No. He fays we fpeak by means of the tongue, the teeth, and the throat; and without them we only fhould bellow.

I. Fun. But furely the mouth

Z. Fun. The mouth, I tell you, is little or nothing, only just a cavity for the air to pass through.

I. Fun. Indeed!

Z. Fun. That's all; and when the cavity's fmall, little founds will come out,; when large, the great ones proceed; obferve now in whistling and bawling.-whifles and bawls. Do you fee. Oh

he is a miraculous man.

I. Fun. But of what ufe is all this?

Z. Fun. But it's knowledge, a'n't it; and of what fignification is that, you fool! and then as to ufe, why he can make me speak in any manner he pleases; as a lawyer, a merchant, a country gentleman; whatever the subject requires.-But here he is.

"

Enter Mr. GRUEL.

Mr. Gruel, your fervant; I have been holding forth in your praise.

Gruel. I make no doubt, Mr. Fungus, but to your declamation, or recitation, (as Quintilian more properly terms it) I fhall be indebted for much future praife, in as much as the reputation of the scholar does (as I may fay) confer or rather as it were reflect, à marvellous kind of luftre on the fame of the master himself.

Z. Fun. There, Ifaac! didft ever hear the like? he talks juft as if it were all out of a book; what would you give to be able to utter fuch words?

I. Fun. And what fhould I do with them? them holiday terms would not pafs in my shop; there's no buying and felling with them.

Gruel. Your obfervation is pithy and pertinent; different ftations different idioms demand, polished periods accord ill with the mouths of mechanics; but as that tribe is permitted to circulate a bafer kind of coin, for the ease and convenience of inferior traffic, fo it is indulged with a vernacular or vicious vulgar phrafeology, to carry on their interlocutory commerce; but I doubt, fir, I foar above the region of your comprehenfion?

1. Fun. Why if you would come down a step or two, I can't fay but I fhould understand you the better.

Z. Fun. And I too.

Gruel. Then to the familiar I fall: if the gentleman has any ambition to fhine at a veftry, a common-hall, or even a convivial club, I can fupply him with ample materials.

I. Fun.