Major. And fwears as much as he ufed ? Sir Jac. An alter'd man, Major; not an oath comes out of his mouth. Major. You furprise me; why, when he frequented our town of a market-day, he has taken out a guinea in oaths-and quite chang'd? Sir Jac. Entirely; they fay his wife has made him a Methodift, and that he preaches at Kennington-Common. Major. What a deal of mifchief thofe rafcals do in the country-Why then we have entirely loft him? but I gota brace Sir Jac. In that way; but I of bind-overs from him laft week for a couple of baftards. Major. Well done, mafter Matthew-but pray now, Sir Jacob [Mob without huzza! Sir Jac. What's the matter now, Roger? Rog. The electors defire to know, if your worship has any body to recommend? Sir Jac. By no means; let them be free in their choice: I fhan't interfere. 1 Rog. And if your worship has any objection to Crifpin Heel-Tap the Cobler's being returning officer? Sir Jac. None, provided the rafcal can keep himself fober: Is he there? Rog. Rog. Yes, Sir Jacob: make way there; ftand farther off from the gate: here is Madam Sneak in a chair,alongwith her husband. Major. Gad-fo, you will permit me to convov her in? Exit Major. Sir Jac. Now here is one of the evils of war. This Sturgeon was as pains taking a Billingsgate-broker as any in the bills of mortality. But the fish is got out of his. element; the foldier has quite demolish'd the citizen. Enter Mrs. Sneak handed by the Major. Mrs. Sneak. Dear Major, I demand a million of pardons. I have given you a profufion of trouble; but my husband is fuch a goofe-cap, that I can't get no good out of himathome or abroad-Jerry, Jerry Sneak! -Your bleffing, Sir Jacob. Sir Jac. Daughter, you are welcome to Garratt. Mrs. Sneak. Why, Jerry Sneak! I fay: Enter Sneak, with a band-box, a hoop-petticoat under his arm, and cardinal, &c. &c. &c. &c. Sneak. Here, lovy. Mrs. Sneak. Here, looby: there, lay these things in the hall; and then go and look after the horfe: are you fure you have got all the things out of the chaife? B Sneak: Sneak. Yes, chuck. Mrs. Sneak. Then give me my fan. [Jerry drops the things in fearching, his pocket for the fan. Mrs Sneak. Did ever mortal fee fuch aI declare, I am quite afham'd to be feen with him abroad: go, get you gone out of. my fight. Sneak. I go, lovy: Good-day to my father-in-law. Sir Fac. I am glad to see you, fon Sneak: But where is your brother Bruin and his wife. Sneak. He will be here anon, father Sir Jacob; he did but just step into the Alley to gather how tickets were fold. Sir Jac. Very well, fon Sneak. [Exit Sneak. Mrs Sneak. Son! yes, and a pretty fon you have provided. Sir Fac. I hope all for the beft: why, what terrible work there would have been, had you married fuch a one as your fifter? one houfe could never have contain'd you. -Now, I thought this meek mate Mrs Sneak. Meek! a mushroom! a milkfop! Sir Fac. Lookye, Molly, I have married you to a man; take care you don't make him a monster. [Exit Sir Jac. Mrs Sneak. Monfter! Why, Major, the fellow has no more heart thana moufe: Had my my kind stars indeed allotted me a military man, I should, doubtless, have deported myfelf in a befeemingly manner. Major. Unqueftionably, madam. o: of Mrs Sneak. Nor would the Major have found, had it been my fortune tpintermarry with him, that Molly Jollup would have difhonoured his cloth. Major. Ifhould have been too happy. Mrs. Sneak. Indeed, Sir, I reverente the army; they are all fo brave; fo polite fo every thing a woman can with Major. Oh! madam-2 ag Mrs. Sneak. So elegant; fo genteel; fo obliging: and then the rank, why, who would dare to affront the wife of a Major? Major. No man with impunity; that I take the freedom to fay, madam..? Mrs. Sneak. I know it, good Sir: Oht I am no ftranger to what I have mifs derri Major. Oh, madam!-Let me die, but fhe has infinite merit. I [Afide. Mrs. Sneak, Then to be join'd to afneak ing flovenly cit; a paltry, praying, pitiful pin-makers iw I spit Major. z Melancholy!colofonul ca Mrs. Sneak. To be joftled and cramm'd with the crowd no refpect, no place, no precedence; to be choak'd with the fmoak of the city no country jaunts but to Iflington; no balls but at Pewterers-hall. Major. Intolerable! Mrs. Sneak. I fee, Sir, you have a proper sense of my fufferings. Major. And would shed my best blood to relieve them. Mrs. Sneak. Gallant gentleman! Mjor. Divine Mrs. Sneak! Mrs. Sneak. Obliging commander! Major. Juft to ravisha kifs fromyour hand. Mrs. Sneak. You have a right to all we can grant. Major. Courteous, condescending, complying-Hum-Ha! Enter Sneak. Sneak. Chuck, my brother and fifter Bruin are just turning the corner; the Clapham ftage was quite full, and fo they came by water. Mrs. Sneak. I wish they had all been fous'd in the Thames-A praying, impertinent puppy! Major. Next time I will clap a centinel to fecure the door. Mrs. Sneak. Major Sturgeon, permit me to withdraw for a moment; my dress demands a little repair. Major. Your ladyfhip's most entirely de voted. Mrs. |