The world of wit and humour, ed. by G.M. FennGeorge Manville Fenn Cassell, Petter, & Galpin, 1899 - 480 стор. |
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Сторінка 5
... asked , " Do sermons that are delivered and not read edify you the most ? " He excited the risibility of the court by replying , " I consider that if ministers cannot remember their own sermons , it is perfectly unreasonable to expect ...
... asked , " Do sermons that are delivered and not read edify you the most ? " He excited the risibility of the court by replying , " I consider that if ministers cannot remember their own sermons , it is perfectly unreasonable to expect ...
Сторінка 13
... asked him what business he had to touch him with his stick . " Why , " replied Erskine , " my stick is my own ; mayn't I use it as I please ? " Being counsel for a person who , whilst travelling in a stage - coach which started from the ...
... asked him what business he had to touch him with his stick . " Why , " replied Erskine , " my stick is my own ; mayn't I use it as I please ? " Being counsel for a person who , whilst travelling in a stage - coach which started from the ...
Сторінка 27
... asked one of the committee - men , a Dutch farmer . " I guess I do , " replied Slick , again rounding the end of the stick with the knife . " Well , let's hear some of your Latin , " said the chairman . " Quambo hic squashium et ...
... asked one of the committee - men , a Dutch farmer . " I guess I do , " replied Slick , again rounding the end of the stick with the knife . " Well , let's hear some of your Latin , " said the chairman . " Quambo hic squashium et ...
Сторінка 28
... asked for a donation to the Society for the Conversion of the Jews , he replied that he had no money to give away ; but if they sent him a Jew , he would try and convert him . This was not quite what the society required , and Hook ...
... asked for a donation to the Society for the Conversion of the Jews , he replied that he had no money to give away ; but if they sent him a Jew , he would try and convert him . This was not quite what the society required , and Hook ...
Сторінка 30
... asked " if you cannot get them inserted in Punch ? " Being confidentially asked , " if it is true you drink much ? " Being asked most seriously by a young lady , " if the incident you described of being locked up in a sponging - house ...
... asked " if you cannot get them inserted in Punch ? " Being confidentially asked , " if it is true you drink much ? " Being asked most seriously by a young lady , " if the incident you described of being locked up in a sponging - house ...
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agin ain't answered Arrah asked Barny bill BRET HARTE called captain captain's gig cried custard dear dinner doctor door DRAGOMAN Dublin enny exclaimed eyes father fellow gentleman give goin hair hand head hear heard horse hoss Irish Irishman joke JOSH BILLINGS keep king lady landlord laugh live look Lord Mashallah mind Miss morning never nigger night nose once pacha Paddy Partington poor pounds pretty remarked replied round Sambo SAMUEL LOVER says shilling side smile Sol Davis soon sure tail talk tell Theodore Hook there's thing thought Titmouse told took traveller Turgesius turned twas walk What's wife wish witness woman word Yankee yer honour young
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Сторінка 366 - So the Deacon inquired of the village folk Where he could find the strongest oak, That could n't be split nor bent nor broke, — That was for spokes and floor and sills; He sent for lancewood to make the thills; The crossbars were ash, from the straightest trees, The panels of white-wood, that cuts like cheese, But lasts like iron for things like these; The hubs of logs from the "Settler's ellum...
Сторінка 133 - Take care of the pence and the pounds will take care of themselves is as true of personal habits as of money.
Сторінка 40 - The school-boy whips his taxed top ; the beardless youth manages his taxed horse with a taxed bridle, on a taxed road ; and the dying Englishman, pouring his medicine, which has paid...
Сторінка 366 - Hahnsum kerridge" they called it then. Eighteen hundred and twenty came; — Running as usual ; much the same. Thirty and forty at last arrive, And then came fifty, and FIFTY-FIVE. Little of all we value here Wakes on the morn of its hundredth year Without both feeling and looking queer. In fact, there's nothing that keeps its youth, So far as I know, but a tree and truth. (This is a moral that runs at large; Take it.
Сторінка 40 - ... everything that comes from abroad, or is grown at home; taxes on the raw material; taxes on every fresh value that is added to it by the industry of man...
Сторінка 366 - n' all the kentry raoun'; It should be so built that it couldn' break daown: "Fur," said the Deacon, '"t's mighty plain Thut the weakes' place mus' stan' the strain; 'N' the way t' fix it, uz I maintain, Is only jest T' make that place uz strong uz the rest.
Сторінка 40 - His whole property is then immediately taxed from 2 to 10 per cent. Besides the probate, large fees are demanded for burying him in the chancel; his virtues are handed down to posterity on taxed marble; and he is then gathered to his fathers, — to be taxed no more.
Сторінка 367 - ... Fifty-five! This morning the parson takes a drive. Now, small boys, get out of the way! Here comes the wonderful one-hoss shay, Drawn by a rat-tailed, ewe-necked bay. "Huddup!" said the parson. — Off went they. The parson was working his Sunday's text, — Had got to fifthly, and stopped perplexed At what the — Moses — was coming next. All at once the horse stood still, Close by the meet'n '-house on the hill.
Сторінка 105 - THE BALLAD OF THE OYSTERMAN. IT was a tall young oysterman lived by the river-side, His shop was just upon the bank, his boat was on the tide; The daughter of a fisherman, that was so straight and slim, Lived over on the other bank, right opposite to him. It was the pensive oysterman that saw a lovely maid, Upon a moonlight evening, a sitting in the shade ; He saw her wave her handkerchief, as much as if to say, "I'm wide awake, young oysterman, and all the folks away.
Сторінка 366 - Now in building of chaises, I tell you what, There is always somewhere a weakest spot, — In hub, tire, felloe, in spring or thill, In panel, or crossbar, or floor, or sill, In screw, bolt, thoroughbrace, — lurking still, Find it somewhere you must and will, — Above or below, or within or without, — And that's the reason, beyond a doubt, A chaise breaks down, but doesn't wear out. But the Deacon swore (as Deacons do, With an "I dew vum...