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had just seen a list of new Peers (English Peers, reader!) among which was a Lord Bradford ; and that he suspected that he was of a branch of their family !--As the old women say, you might have knocked me down with a feather. I did not know which way to look. The blush that warmed my cheek for him then, renews itself as I write. -He did not drop it here. He dunned my ears about it half a dozen times; and even went so far as to request me to make inquiries about it, when I wrote home. - It was on this most ludicrous occasion, that I burst out, “ Ah, d-n you, I see you are all « Aristocrats and Royalists in your hearts yet. “ Your republicanism is nothing but hypocrisy." And I dare say the reader will think I was half right. I wonder what are the armorial signs of Bradford's family. The crest must be a Goose, of course, Instead of scollops and gueules, he may take a couple of printers balls, a keg of lampblack and a jorden. His two great bears of sons (I except William) may serve as supporters, and his motto may be, “ One shilling and seven-pence half-penny
for a pamphlet." All this will form a pretty good republican coat of arms.
Let it be remembered here too, that my calling the Bradfords Aristocrats and hypocrites, does not prove me to be a hypocrite, a needy hireling, or a coward. As to this last term which young Lampblack has conferred on me, it is the blustering noise of a poor timid trembling cock, crowing upon his own dunghill. I hurl bis coward back to his teeth, with the addition of fool and scoundrel. I think that is interest enough for one fortnight. The father has served the silly son, as the monkey served the cat, when he took her paw to rake the chesnuts out of the fire with.
They accuse me of being given to scandal.-If I had published, or made use of, one hundredth part
of the anecdotes they supplied me with, I should have set the whole city together by the ears. The governor's share alone would fill a volume.--I'll just mention one or two, which will prove, that I am not the first old acquaintance that Bradford has betrayed.--He told me of a judge, who, when he presented him an old account, refused to pay it, as it was setting a bad example. “Ah, righteous judge! “A Second Daniel !" He told me, that he went once to breakfast wirh Mr. Dallas, now Secretary of the State of Pennsylvania, and that Dallas said to him: “ By G-d, Tom, we have no sugar, and I “ have not a farthing in the world.”—“ So,” says my Lord Bradford, " I put my hand in my pocket, « and tossed the girl a quarter of a dollar, and she
went out and got some.' -Another time, he said, Mr. Dallas's hair-dresser was going to sue him for a few shillings, when he, like a generous friend, stepped in and put a stop to further proceedings, by buying the debt at a great discount. whether he says he was repaid, or not.
These anecdotes he wanted me to make use of; but these, as well as all the others he furnished me with, appeared to me to be brought forth by private mnalice, and therefore I never made use of any of them. Though, I must confess, that, in one instance in particular, this was a very great act of selfdenial.
From Secretaries of State, Judges and Governors, let us come to Presidents.--Don't start, reader, my bookseller knew nothing against General Washington, or he would have told it.-No; we are now going to see a trait of Bradford's republicanism of another kind.-Marten's Law of Nations, a work that I translated from the French for Bradford, is dedicated, by hin, to the President of the United Srates. The dedication was written by me, notwithstanding the Bradfords were obliged to
amend ny writings. When a proof of it was taken off, old Bradford proposed a fulsome addition to it;
give the old boy a littte more oil,” said he. This greasing I refused to have any hand in, and notwithstanding I did not know how to write, and was a needy hireling, My Lord and Master, Bradford, did not think proper to make any alteration, though I could have no reasonable objection, as it was signed with his name.
While the old man was attempting to wheedle the President and the officers of the Federal Government, the son, Samuel, was wheedling the French Minister : the Bradfords love a double game dearly. He spent whole evenings with him, or at least he told me so. According to his account they were like two brothers. I cannot blame Mr. Adet, who undoubtedly must have a curiosity to know all the secrets of Bradford's press. For my part, as soon as I heard of this intimacy, I looked upon myself as being as well known to the French Minister as I was to Bradford.
But, there is a tale connected with this, which must be told, because it will give the lie to all that young Lampblack has said about correcting and altering my works. His design is to make people believe that I was obliged to submit to his prunings. We shall see how this was in a moment. In the New Year's Gift, speaking of the French Minister, I make use of the following words : “not " that I doubt his veracity, thangh his not being “ a Christian might be a trifling objection, with some weak minded people.'
The old Goosy wanted me to change the word Christian for Protestant, as he was a good friend, and might be useful to his son. He caine himselt with the proof sheet, to prevail on me to do this : but if the reader looks into the New Year's Gift, he will see that I did not yield.
Bradford never prevailed on me to leave out a single word in his life, except a passage in the Congress Gallery.
“ Remember" (says the son in a triumphant manner) "Remember what was erased “ from the Congress Gallery.”—-I do remember it, thou compost of die-stuff, lampblack and urine, I do remember it well; and since you have not told all about it, I will. -The passage erased con. tained some remarks on the indecent and every way unbecoming expression of Mr. Lewis, on the trial of Randall, when he said, that gentlemen would have served his client right, if they had kicked hina out of the room.
Bradford told me he had a very particular reason for wishing this left out, and as it was not a passage to which I attached much importance, left out it was : but, had I known that his very particular reason was, that he had engaged Mr, Lewis as his counsellor in a suit which he had just then commenced against his deceased brother's widow and his own sisters, the passage should not have been left out, for him nor for Mr. Lewis nei. ther. I fear no lawyers. From this fact we may form a pretty correct idea of the independence of Bradford's press, when left to his own.conducting.*
I think, the further we go the deeper My Lord Bradford gets in the mire. Let us stop the career, then. Let us dismiss him, his sons, his press and
* Bradford pretends to detect me in a lie about my having a press. I have two now at work for me, and the printers are always paid the instant their work is done. Can a Bradford say as much?He tells me something about my being obliged to pay my taxes. To be sure I aw; but did any tax-gatherer ever dare clap his hand on any of my goods or chattels ? No; but the land of Thomas Bradford; back-land which he got out of the old soldiers, who were fighting last war while he was a sort of jailer: this land was sold last year by the Sheriff, and that to pay the taxes 103---You see, My Lord Bradford, that you have refreshed my memory to some purpose.
his shop, with a remark or two on one more passage of his son's letter, “ You” (meaning me) “ can « declaim and scandalize with the greatest hero of
Billingsgate, yet, in sober argument and chastity “ of inanner, you are a mere nincompoop.” The reader must have observed, that Boileau, Roscommon and Pope, in their poetical rules, always convey the precept in an example ; so we see here, that young Lampblack gives us an example of the very manner he decries.-But, a word more about chastity: not quite in the same sense, though not so far from it as to render the transition very abrupt.Chastity from the pen of a Bradford ! Chastity I say, from No. 8, South-Front Street ! Chastity from the bawdy-book shop!- I have no pretension to an overstock of modesty or squeamishness. I have served an apprenticeship in the army; yet have I often been shocked to see what the Bradfords sell. Not, perhaps, so much at the obscenity of the books, as at the conduct of the venders. I do not know a traffic so completely infamous as this. In London it is confined to the very scum of the Jews. It is ten times worse than the trade of a bawd: it is pimping for the eyes : it creates what the punk does but satisfy when created. These literary panders are the purveyors for the bawdyhouse. However, as far as relates to the people in question, the sons are not to blame : “
“ a father's “ wish is a law with them."
I shall conclude with observing, that though Bradford's publication was principally intended to do away the charge of having duped me in the one and seven pence half-penny job, he has left it just as it was. His son, has, indeed, attempted to bewilder the reader by a comparison between the prices of the ensuing pamphlets; but what has this to do with the matter? His father took the Observations, was to publish them, and give me half the profits, Long after, many months after, every copy of the K4