Зображення сторінки
PDF
ePub

dies, who had rather still be deluded, and will | voice, if I am not more sincere in my affection hate your friendship for breaking the charm? for this little finger, than for all the sex besides. Ara. My dear cousin, though you are satisfied,

[The ladies seem astonished. these ladies are not; and, if they have their par- Tuke. Except the widow Damply. ticular reasons for their infidelity, pray, let them Daf. She ! Do you know her, madam? enjoy it

, 'till they have other proofs than your Tuke. I have not that honour. prejudices.

Daf. I thought so–Did you never see her, Šop. Ay, Bell, we have all our prejudices. madam, nodling and gogling in her old-fashioned

Tuke. What signifies reasoning, when we are heavy chariot, drawn by a pair of lean hackney going upon the experiment? Dispose of yourselves horses, with a fat blackamoor footman behind, behind those trees, and I will repair to the place in a scanty livery, red greasy stockings, and a of appointment, and draw him hither; but you dirty turban? [The widow seems disordered. promise to contain yourselves, let what will hap- Tuke. All which may be only a foil to her pen. Hear, and see; but be silent

beauty.

[Sighs [Erit Tukely. Daf. Beauty! don't sigh, madam; she is past Sop. A severe injunction, indeed, ladies—But forty, wears a wig, and has lost two of her fore I must to my post.

[Exit Sop. teeth.

- And, then, she has so long a beard Mirs Damp. If he's a villain, I can never hold! upon her upper lip, and takes so much Spanish Lady Pew. I shall tear his eyes out!

snuff, that she looks, for all the world, like the Mrs Dot. For ny part, if I was unmarried, I Great Mogul in petticoats; ha, hashould not think him worth my anger.

Mrs Damp. What falsehood and ingratitude! Ara. But as you are, madam

[Aside. Mirs Dot. I understand your insinuations, Miss Tuke. Could I descend to the slander of the Bell; but my character and conduct need no jus- town, there is a married ladytification.

Daf. Poor Mrs Dotterel, you mean? Ara. I beg pardon, madam; I intended no Mrs Dot. Wby, am I to be mentioned ! offence.—But baste to your posts, ladies; the I have nothing to doenemy's at hand. [They retire behind the trees. Mrs Damp. Nay, nay; you must have your Enter TUKELY and DAFFODIL.

share of the panegyric.

Tuke. She is young, and has wit. Tuke. (In a woman's voice.] For Heaven's Daf. She's an idiot, madam ; and as fools are sake, let us be cautious !- I am sure I heard a generally loving, she has forgot all her obligationis noise.

to old Mr Dotterel, who married her without a Daf. 'Twas nothing but your fear, my angel ! petticoat; and now seizes upon every young fel

-don't be alarmed- -There can be no dan- low she can lay her hands upon--she has spoiled ger, while we have love and darkness to befriend me three suits of clothes, with tearing the Baps

and sleeves. Ha, ha, ha! Tuke. Bless me, how my heart beats !

Mrs Dot. Monster of iniquity! Daf. Poor soul! what a fright it is in !- Daf. She has even stormed me in my own You must not give way to these alarmsWere house; but, with all my faults, madam, you'll you as well convinced of my honour, as I am of never find me over-fond of age, or ignorance. your charms, you would have nothing to fear- Mrs Damp. I could tear him to pieces !

(Squeezes her hand. Mrs Dot. I will tear him to pieces ! Ara. Upon my word!

Aside. Ara. Be quiet, and we'll all tear him to pieces. Mrs Damp. So, so, so !

Aside. Tuke. He has swallowed the book, and can't Tuke. Hold, sir; you must take no liberties, escape.

Aside. But, if you have the least feeling for an unhappy Daf. What do you say, madam? woman, urged by her passion to this imprudent Tuke. I am only sighing, sir. step, assist me-forgive memlet me go.

Baf. Fond creature ! (Aside.] I know there Daf. Cau you doubt my honour? Can you are a thousand stories about me : You have doubt my love? What assurances can I give you heard, too, of Lady Fanny Pewit, I suppose ? to abate your fears?

Don't be alarmed. Mrs Dot. Very slender ones, I can assure her. Tuke. I can't help it, sir. She is a fine woman,

(Aside, and a woman of quality. Tuke. I deserve to suffer all I feel-For Daf. A fine woman, perhaps, for a woman of what, but the most blinded passion, could induce quality—but she is an absolute old maid, madam, me to declare myself to one, whose amours and almost as thick as she is long-middle-aged, infidelities are the common topic of conversa- homely, and wanton! That's her character. tion !

Lady Pew. Then, there is no sincerity in man. Daf. Flattering creature ! [Aside.)-May I

(Going: never know your dear naine, see your charming Ara. Positively, you shan't stir. face, touch your soft hand, or hear your sweet Daf. Upon my soul, I pity the poor creature!

us.

on,

- She is now upon her last legs. If she does Daf. For your sake, madam, I'll make the not run away with some foolish gentleman this best of my way home

(Going. winter, she'll return into the country, and marry Tuke. What! would you leave me to the fury her footman, ha, ha, ha!

of an enraged husband Is that

your

affection! Lady Pew. My footuan shall break his bones,

[Holds him. I can tell him that.

Sop. If I could but catch her-Ha! what's Daf. Hush, madam! I protest, I thought I that? I saw something move in the dark—the heard a voice-I wonder they don't come. point of my sword shall tickle it out, whatever it

[Aside. is.

[Draws, and goes towards them. Tuke. 'Twas only I, Mr Daffodil — I was mur- Tuke. For Heaven's sake draw, and fight him, muring to you.

(Sighs. while I make my escape ! Daf. Pretty murmurer !-—'Egad, if they don't Daf. Fight hiin! 'twould be cowardly to fight come soon, the lady will grow fond. Aside. in the dark, and with a drunken man—I'll call

Tuke. But among your conquests, Mr Daffo- the sentry. dil, you forget Miss Sophy Sprightly.

Tuke. And exp' se us to the world? Daf. And her cousin Arabella.—I was coming Daf. I would to Heaven we were ! [Aside. to them; poor, silly, good-natured, loving fools ! He comes forward.] Let me go, madam; you pinch I made my addresses to one through pique, and me to the hone. the other for pity; that was all.

Tuke. He won't know us—I have my mask Tuke. O, that I could believe you !

Daf. Don't be uneasy ! I'll tell you how it was, Ladies. Ha, ha, ha! madam-You must know, there is a silly, self- Sop. What, is the devil and his imps playing at sufficient fellow, one Tukely

blind man's buff? Ay, ay; here he is, indeed; SaTuke. So, so.—[ Aside.]—I know him a little. tan himself, dressed like a fine gentleman--Come,

Daf. I am sorry for it-The less you know of Mr Devil, out with your pitchfork, and let us him, the better ; the fellow pretended to look take a thrust or two. fierce at me, for which I resolved to have his Daf. You mistake me, sir, I am not the permistress : So I threw in my line, and without son; indeed, I am not; I know nothing of your much trouble, hooked her. Her poor cousin, wife, sir George; and if you know how little I too, nibbled at the bait, and was caught. So I care for the whole sex, you would not be so fuhave had my revenge upon Tukely, and now I rious with an innocent man. shall willingly resign poor Sophy, and throw him Sop. Who are you, then? And what are you in her cousin, for a make-weight, ha, ha, ha! doing with that blackamoor lady there-dan

Lady Pew. This is some comfort, at least. cing a saraband with a pair of castanets ? Speak, Ara. Your ladyship is better than you was. sir !

[Noise without. Daf. Pray forbear, sir; here's company coming Tuke. I vow, I hear a noise. What shall we that will satisfy you in every thing-Hallo, hallodo? It comes this way.

Here, here, here! [Hallo's faintly.] my lord, my Daf. They can't see us, my dear.— I wish my lord !-- Spinner-Dizzy_Hallo! friends would come. (Aside.) Don't whisper, or breathe.

Enter Lopp Racket, Sir TANTIVY, SPINNER, Enter Sopkia, in a surtout, and slouched hat.

und Dizzy, with torches. Sop. If I could but catch her at her pranks~ Lord Rac. What's the matter here ?-Who she certainly must be this way—for the chair is calls for help? waiting at the end of Rosamond's pond—I have Duf. [Running to them with his sword drawn.] thrown one of her chairmen into it-and, if I O, my friends, I have been wishing for you

this could but catch her

half hour! I have been set upon by a dozen felTuke. O, sir! my passion has undone me-Ilows, They have all made their escape, but this am discovered; it is my husband, sir George, -My arm is quite dead-I have been at cart and he is looking for me!

and tierce with them all, for near a quarter of an Daf. The devil it is! Why, then, madam, the hour. best way will be for you to go to him—and let Sop. In buckram, my lord !-He was got with me sneak off the other way.

my property here, and I would have chastised Tuke. Go to bim, sir! What can I say to him? him for it, if your coming had not prevented it.

Daf. Any thing, inadam-Say you had the Daf. Let us throw the rascal into Rosamond's vapours, and wanted air.

pond. Tuke. Lord, sir! he is the most passionate Lord Rac. Come sir, can you swim? of mortals; and I am afraid he is in liquor,

(All going up. TUKELY snatches Sotoo; and, then, he is mad!

Para's sword, and she runs behind Sup. If I could but catch her

him. (Looking about. Tuke. I'll deferid you, my dear !-What, would you murder a man, and lie with his wife, too?- Sop. Who bids fairést now for Rosamond's Oh! you are a wicked gentleman, Mr Daffodil. pond?

[Attacks Daffodil. Lord Rac. What, in the name of wonder, is Daf. Why, the devil's in the woman, I think ! all this business? I don't understand it.

(All the ladies advance from behind. Diz. Nor I neither; but 'tis very drole, faith! Ladies. Ha, ha, ha! your humble servant, Mr Tuke. The mystery will clear in a moment. Daffodil-ha, ha, ha!

[Curtsying. Daf. Don't give yourself any trouble, Mr Daf. This is all enchantment!

Tukely; things are pretty clear as they are Lady Pew. No, sir, the enchantment is broke; The night's cool, and my cousin Dizzy, bere, is and the old maid, sir, homely and wanton, before an invalid—If you please, another time, when she retires into the country, has the satisfactiou there is less company.—Ladies laugh.]—The laof knowing that the agreeable Mr Daffodil is a dies are pleased to be merry, and you are pleased much more contemptible mortal, than the foot to be a little angry; and so, for the sake of tranman which his goodness bas been pleased to mar- quillity—I'll go to the opera. ry her to.

(DAFFODIL sneaks out by degrees. Ladies. Ha, ha, ha!

Lord Rac. This is a fine blow-up, indeed Mrs Damp. Would Mr Daffodil please to have Ladies, your humble servant-Hallo! Daffodil. a pinch of Spanish snuff out of the great moguls

[Erit. box? Tis the best thing in the world for low Diz. I'll lay you a hundred, that my cousin spirits.

[Offers her bor. never intrigues again-George! George! Don't Ladies. Ha, ha, ha!

run-hugh, hugh

[Erit. Mrs Dot. If a fool may not be permitted to Tuke. As my satisfaction is complete, I have speak, Mr Daffodil, let her at least he permitted none to ask of Mr Daffodil

. I forgive his bebato laugh at so fine a gentleman-Ha, ha, ha! viour to ine, as it has hastened and confirmed my

Ara. Were you as sensible of shame, as you happiness here. [To Sophia.)—But as a friend are of fear, the sight of me, whom you loved for to you, ladies, I shall insist upon his making you pity, would be revenge sufficient-But I can for-ample satisfaction : However, this benefit will give your baseness to me, much easier than I arise, that you will hereafter equally detest and can myself

, for my behaviour to this happy shun these destroyers of your reputation. couple. Daf. Who the devil are they?

In you coquettry is a loss of fame; Ara. The marquis and marchioness of Maca- But, in our sex, 'tis that detested name, roni, ladies— Ha, ha, ha!

That marks the want of manhood, virtue, sense Sop. Ha! Mio Carrissimo Amico, il signior and shame. Daffodillo ! Daf. How! Tukely and Sophia !- If I don't

[Ereunt omnes. wake soon, I shall wish never to wake again!

[blocks in formation]

SCENE I.-BELMOUR's lodging. master, you can't conceive the good it would do

your health, if you will but keep your temper a Enter Belmour, beating Brisk. little. Brisk. MR Belmour ! Let me die, sir-as I Bel. Mighty well, sir, give your advice ! hope to be saved, sir

Brisk. Why, really, now, this same love hath meBel

. Sirrah! Rogue! Villain !—I'll teach you, tamorphosed us both very strangely, master: for, I will

, you rascal! to speak irreverently of her 1 to be free, here have we been at this work these love!

six weeks, stark-staring mad in love with a couple Brisk. As I am a sinner, sir, I only meant of baggages not worth a groat : and yet, Heaven Bel. Only meant! You could not mean it, help us ! they have as niuch pride as comes to jackanapes--you had no meaning, booby. the share of a lady of quality, before she has been

Brisk. Why, no, sir-that's the very thing, sir caught in the fact with a handsome young fellow, -I had no meaning.

or indeed after she has been caught, for that Bel. Then, sirrah, I'll make you know your mattermeaning for the future.

Bel. You won't have done, rascal ! Brisk. Yes, sir-to be sure, sir-and ver Brisk. In short, my young mistress and her upon my word, if you would be but a little cool, maid have as much pride and poverty as—as sir, you'd find I'm not much to blame. Besides, no matter what; they have the devil and allVOL. III.

9 F

when, at the same time, every body knows the Brisk. Heaven help us, not much to crack old broken upholsterer, Miss Harriet's father, of. might give us all he has in the world, and not Bel. Not much to crack of, Mr Brazen ! Prieat the worse pudding on a Sunday for it. the, Rovewell, how can you be so ungenerous as Bel. Impious, execrable atheist! What, de

to ask such a question? You know I don't mind tract from Heaven? I'll reform your notions, I fortune ; though, by the way she has an uncle, will, you saucy

[Beats him. who is determined to settle very handsomely upBrisk. Nay, but my dear sir--a little patience on her, and on the strength of that does she give --not so hard

herself innumerable airs.

Rove. Fortune not to be minded! I'll tell Enter ROVEWELL.

you what, Belmour, though you have a good one

already, there's no kind of inconvenience in a Rove. Belmour, your servant---What, at log-little more. I am sure if I had not minded forgerheads with my old friend Brisk ?

tune, I might have been in Jamaica still, not Bel. Confusion !-Mr Rovewell, your servant worth a sugar-cane; but the widow Molosses took ----this is your doing, hang-dug !---Jack Rovewell, a fancy to ine-Heaven, or a worse destiny, has I am glad to see thee

taken a fancy to her; and so, after ten vears exRove. Brisk used to a good servant-he has ile, and being turned a-drift by my father, here not been tampering with any of his master's girls, am I again, a warm planter, and a widower, has be?

most woefully tired of matrimony. But, my Bel. Do you know, Rovewell, that he has had dear Belmour, we were both so overjoyed to the impudence to talk detractingly and profane- meet one another yesterday evening, just as I ly of my mistress?--

arrived in town, that I did not hear a syllable Brisk. For which, sir, I have suffered inhu- from you of your love-fit. How, when, and manly, and most unchristian-like, I assure you, where, did this happen? Bel. Will you leave prating, booby?

Bel. Oh, by the most fortunate accident that Rove. Well, but Belmour, where does she erer was-I'll tell thee, Rovewell—I was going live? I am but just arrived, you know, and I'll one night from the tavern about six weeks agogo and heat up her quarters.

I had been there with a parcel of blades, whose Bel. (Half aside.) Beat up her quarters ! only joy is centered in their bottle; and faith, (Looks at him smilingly, then half aside. till this accident, I was no better myself but

ever since, I am grown quite a new man. Favours to none, to all she smiles extends; Rove. Av, a new man, indeed! Who, in the Oft she rejects, but never once offends. name of wonder, would take thee, sunk as thou

[Stands musing. art, into a musing, moping, melancholy lover,

for the gay Charles Belmour, whom I knew in Rove. Hey! what, fallen into a reverie? Pri- the West Indies ? thee, Brisk, what does all this mean?

Bel. Poh! that is not to be mentioned. You Brisk. Why, sir, you must know-I am over know my father took me against my will from head and ears in love.

the university, and consigned me over to the acaRove. But I mean your master; what ails demic discipline of a man of war; so that, to him ?

prevent a dejection of spirits, I was obliged to Brisk. That's the very thing I am going to tell run into the opposite extreme-as you yourself you, sir–As I said, sir-I am over head and ears were won't to do. in love with a whimsical queer kind of a piece Rove. Why, yes; I had my moments of rehere in the neighbourhood; and so nothing can Aection, and was glad to dissipate them. You serve my master, but he must fall in love with

know I always told you there was something exthe mistress. Look at him now, sir

traordinary in my story; and so there is still. I (BELMOur continues musing and mutter- suppose it must be cleared up in a few days now ing to himselt:)

-I am in no hurry about it, though : I must see the Rove. Ha, ha, ha ! Poor Belmour, I pity thee, town a little this evening, and have my frolic with all my heart

first. But to the point, Belmour-you was ge[Strikes him on the shoulder. ing from the tavern, you sav?

Bel. Yes, sir, about two in the morning; and Ye gods, annihilate both space and time, I perceived an unusual blaze in the air-I was And make two lovers happy.

in a rambling humour, and so resolved to know

what it was. Bel. My dear Rovewell, such a girl! Ten Brisk. I and my master went together, sir. thousand cupids play about her mouth, you Bel. Oh, Rovewell! my better stars ordained rogue !

it to light me on to happiness. By sure attracRove. Ten thousand pounds had better play tion led, I came to the very street where a house about her pocket. What fortune has she? was on fire; water-engines playing, flames as

« НазадПродовжити »