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the practice of 'nis elder brothers, who had made a buncle nose likewise bore an exeessive rate; but for human heart their butt in all countries and ages. your ordinary short turned-up noses, of which there To break him of this roguish trick, his parents pat was the greatest consumption, they cost little or bim to school to Mercury, who did all he could to nothing; at least the purchasers thought so, who hinder him from demolishing the uoses of mankind; would have been content to have paid much dearer but, in spite of education, the boy continued very for them rather than to have gone without them. unlucky; and, though his malice was a little softened The sympathy betwixt the nose and its parent vas by good instructions, he would very frequently let fly very extraordinary. Hadibras has told us, that an envenomed arrow, and wound his votaries oftener when the porter died, the nose dropped of course, in in the nose than in the heart. Thus far the fable. which case it was always usual to return the nose, ia

I need not tell my learned reader, that Correggio order to have it interred with its first owner. The has drawn a Cupid taking his lesson from Mercury nose was likewise affected by the pain, as well as conformable to this poem; nor that the poem itself death, of the original proprietor. An eminent inwas designed as a burlesque upon Fracastorius. stance of this nature happened to three Spaniards,

It was a little after this fatal siege of Naples, that whose noses were all made out of the same piece of Taliacotius began to practise in a town of Germany. brawn. They found them one day shoot and swell He was the first love-doctor that I meet with in his extremely; upon which they sent to know bow the tory, and a greater man in his age than our cele- porter died; and heard, upon inquiry, that the pubrated doctor Wall. He saw his species extremely rent of the noses had been severely kicked the day mutilated and disfigured by this new distemper that before, and that the porter kept his bed or account was crept into it; and therefore, in pursuance of a of the bruises which he had received. This was very seasonable invention, set up a manufacture of highly resented by the Spaniards, who found out noses : having first got a patent that none should the person who had used the porter so unmercifully, presume to make noses besides himself. His first and treated him in the same manner as if the indig. patient was a great man of Portugal, who had done nity had been done to their own noses. In this and good services to his country, but in the midst of them several other cases it might be said, that the porters unfortunately lost his nose. Taliacotius grafted a led the gentlemen by the nose. new one on the remaining part of the gristle or car- On the other hand, if any thing went amiss with tilaginous substance, which would sneeze, smell, the nose, the porter felt the effects of it; insomuch, take snuff, pronounce the letters M or N; and in that it was generally articled with the patient, that short, do all the functions of a genuine and natural he should not only abstain from all his old courses, nose. There was, however, one misfortune in this but should, on no pretence whatsoever, smell pepper, experiment: the Portuguese's complexion was a or eat mustard; on which occasion, the part where little upon the subfuse, with very black eyes and the incision had been made, was seized with uedark eye-brows; and the nose being taken from a speakable twinges and prickings, porter that had a white German skin, and cut out of The Englishman I before mentioned was so very those parts that are not exposed to the sun, it was irregular, and relapsed so frequently into the disvery visible that the features of his face were not temper which at first brought him to the learned Ta. fellows. In a word, the Comdè resembled one of liacotins, that in the space of two years he wore out those maimed antique statues that has often a mo- five poses; and by that means so tormented the dern nose of fresh marble glued to a face of such a porters, that if he would have given five hundred yellow, ivory complexion, as nothing can give but pounds for a nose, there was not one of them that age. To remedy this particular for the future, the would accommodate him. This young gentleman doctor got together a great collection of porters, inen was born of honest parents, and passed his first of all complexions, black, fair, brown, dark, sallow, years in fox-hunting ; but accidentally quitting the pale, and ruddy; so that it was impossible for a pa. woods, and coming up to London, he was so charmed tient of the most out-of-the-way colour not to find a with the beauties of the playhouse, that he had Dot nose to match it.

been in town two days before he got the misfortune The doctor's house was now very much enlarged, which carried off this part of his face. He used to and became a kind of college, or rather hospital, for be called in Germany the Englishman of five noses' the fashionable cripples of both sexes, that resorted and the gentleman that had thrice as many poses to him from all parts of Europe. Over his door was as he had ears.' Such was the raillery of those fastened a large golden snout, not unlike that which times. is placed over the great gates at Brazen-dose college I shall close this paper with an admonition to the in Oxford; and, as it is usual for the learned in to young men of this town—which I think the more reign universities to distinguish their houses by a necessary, because I see several new fresh-coloured Latin sentence, the doctor writ underneath this faces that have made their appearance in it this great golden proboscis two verses out of Ovid: winter. I must therefore assure them, that the art Militat omnis amans, habet et sua castra Cupido;

of making noses is entirely lost ; and, in the next Pontice, crede mihi, militat omnis amans.

place, beg them not to follow the example of ou Ovid. Amor. El. ix. 1. liacotius to be met with at the corner of every street

ordinary town rakes, who live as if there was a litThe toils of love require a warrior's art;

Whatever young men may think, the nose is a very And every lover plays the soldier's part.

becoming part of the face; and a man makes but a It is reported that Taliacotius had at one time in very silly figure without it. But it is the nature of his house, twelve German counts, nineteen French youth not to know the value of any thing until they marquisses, and a hundred Spanish cavaliers, besides have lost it. The general precept therefore, I shall one solitary English esquire, of whom more hereaf- leave with them is, to regard every town-woman as ter. Though the doctor had the monopoly of noses a particular kind of syren, that has a desiga upop in his own hands, he is said not to have been unrea- their noses; and that, amidst her flatteries and als sonable. Indeed, if a man had occasion for a high lurements, they will fancy she speaks to them in Roman nose, he must go to the price of it. A car. Ithat bumourous phrase of old Plautus. Ego tibi, ja

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etem denusabo mordicús. “Keep your face out of my As I was going on in tne consideration of this gour way, or I will bite off your nose.

office which Mr. Clement proposés to do his country, I received the following letter, which seems to be

dictated by a like modest and public spirit, that makes No. 261.) SATURDAY, DECEMBER 9, 1710.

use of me also in its design of obliging mankind: From my own Apartment, December 8.

MR. BICKERSTAFF, It is the duty of all who make philosophy the en- In the royal lottery for a million and a half, I tertainment of their lives, to turn their thoughts to had the good fortune of obtaining a prize. From bepractical schemes for the good of society, and not pass fore the drawing I had devoted a fifth of whatever away their time in fruitless searches which tend rather should arise to me for charitable uses. Accordingly, to the ostentation of kuowledge, than the service of I lately troubled you with my request and commislife. For this reason I cannot forbear reading even sion for placing half-a-dozen youths with Mr. More, the common bills that are daily put into people's writing.master, in Castle-street, to whom, it is said, hands as they pass the streets, which give us notice we owe all the fine devices, flourishes, and the com. of the present residence, the past travels, and infal- posure of all the plates, for the drawing and paying lible medicines of doctors useful in their generation, the tickets. Be pleased, therefore, good sir, to find though much below the character of the renowned or make leisure for complying therewith, for I would Taliacotius. But, upon a nice calculation of the not appear concerned in this small matter. successes of such adepts, I find their labours tend

"I am very much, mostly to the enriching only one sort of men, that

• Your humble servant, &c.' is to say, the society of upholders. From this ob

It is no small pleasure to observe that, in the midst servation, and many others which occur to me when of a very degenerate age, there are still spirits which I am numbering the good people of Great Britain, 1 retain their natural dignity, and pursue the good of cannot but favour any proposal which tends to re- their fellow-creatures : some in making themselves pairing the losses we sustain by eminent cures. The useful by professed service, some by secret generosity; best I have met with in this kind, has been offered Were Y at liberty to discover even all the good'I to my consideration, and recommended, in a letter know of many men living at this time, there would subscribed Thomas Clement. The title to his printed want nothing but a suitable historian, to make them articles rups thus : 'By the profitable society at the Wheat-sheaf, over against Tom's coffee-house, in appear

as illustrious as any of the noblest of the an

cient Greeks or Romans. The cunning some have Rassel-street, Covent-Garden, new proposals for pro- used to do handsome and worthy actions, the address moting a contribution towards raising two hundred

to do men services, and escape their notice, has proand fifty pounds, to be made on the baptizing of any duced so many surprising incidents, which have been infant born in wedlock. The plan is laid with such laid before me during my censorship, as, in the opiproper regulations, as serve, to such as fall in with it nion of posterity, would absolve this age of all its for the sake of their posterity, all the uses, without crimes and follics. I know no way to deal with such any of the inconveniencies of settlements. By this delicate minds as these, but by assuring them that, means, such whose fortunes depend upon their own industry or personal qualifications, need not be de- When they cease to do good, I shall tell all the good terred, by fear of poverty, from that state which na- factor to the youths above-mentioned continue such

they have done already. Let, therefore, the beneture and reason prescribe to us, as the fountain of the bounties

, upon pain of being publicly praised. But greatest happiness in human life. The Censors of there is no probability of his running into that haRome had power vested in them to lay taxes on the zard; for a strong habit of virtue can make men unmarried; and I think I cannot show my impartiality suspend the receiving the acknowledgments due to better, than in inquiring into the extravagant pri- their merit, until they are out of a capacity of receivvileges my brother bachelors enjoy, and fining them ing them. I am so very much charmed with acciaccordingly. I shall not allow a single life in one dents of this kind, that I have made a collection of sex to be reproached, and held in esteein in the other. all the memorable handsome things done by private It would not, methinks, be amiss, if an old bachelor, men in my time. As a specimen of my manner of who lives in contempt of matrimony, were obliged to noting such actions, take the following fragment, out give a portion to an old maid who is willing to enter of much more, which is written in my year-book, on into it. At the same time I must allow, that those the remarkable will of a gentleman, whom I shall who can plead courtship, and were unjustly rejected, bere call Celam.co. shall not be liable to the pains and penalties of celi

* This day died that plain and excellent man, my bacy. But such as pretend an aversion to the whole much-honoured friend, Celamico, who bequeathed his sex, because they were ill-treated by a particular fe- whole estate to a gentleman no way related to him, male, and cover their sense of disappointment in and to whom he had given no such expectation in his women under a contempt of their favour, shall be pro-life-time." ceeded against as bachelors convict. I am not with

He was a person of a very enlarged soul, and . out hopes, that from this slight warning, all the unmarried men of fortune, taste, and refinement, will, thought the nearest relation among men to be the re

semblance of their minds and sentiments. He was without further delay, become lovers and humble not mistaken in the worth of his successor, who reservants to such of their acquaintance as are most ceived the news of his unexpected good fortune with agreeable to them, under pain of my censures

: and it an air that showed him less moved with the benefit is to be hoped the rest of the world, who remain single than the loss of the benefactor. for fear of the encumbrances of wedlock, will become subscribers to Mr. Clement's proposal. By these means we shall have a much more numerous account Notice is hereby given, that on Monday, the of births in the year 1711, than any ever before eleventh instant, the case of the visit comes od, bes known in Great Britain, where merely to be born is tween the hours of ten and eleven, at the Court of a distinction of providence greater than being born Honour; where both persons are to attend, the mgeet to a fortune in another place.

ing there not being to be understood as a visit, and

ADVERTISEMENT.

the right of the next visit being then to be wholly to search the criminal, who, after some time spent settled, according to the prayer of the plaintiff. therein, acquitted her of the bodice, but found her

guilty of the rump: upon which she received sesNo. 262.) TUESDAY, DECEMBER 12, 1710. tence as is usual in such cases.

William Trippet, esquire, of the Middle Temple, Verba togæ sequeris, juncturâ callidus acri, brought his action against the lady Elizabeth Ore teres modico, pallentes radere mores Prudely, for having refused him her hand as he of Doctus, et ingenuo culpam defigere ludo. fered to lead her to her coach from the opera. The

Pers. Sat. v. 14. plaintiff set forth, that he had entered himself into Soft elocution does thy style renown,

the list of those volunteers, who officiate every night And the sweet accents of the peaceful gown;

behind the boxes as gentlemen-ushers of the playGentle or sharp, according to thy choice,

house: that he had been at considerable charge is To laugh at follies, or to lash at vice. Dryden. white gloves, periwigs, and snuff-boxes, in order to

qualify himself for that employment, and in hopes of JOURNAL OF THE COURT OF HONOUR, &c.

making his fortune by it. " The counsel for the deTimothy Treatall, gentleman, was indicted by fendant replied, that the plaintiff had given out that several ladies of his sister's acquaintance for a very he was within a month of wedding their client, and rude affront offered to them at an entertainment, to that she had refused her hand to him in ceremony, which he had invited them on Tuesday, the seventh lest he should interpret it as a promise that she of November last past, between the hours of eight would give it him in marriage. As soon as the and nine in the evening. The indictment set forth, pleadings on both sides were finished, the Censor that the said Mr. Treatall, upon the serving up of ordered the plaintiff to be cashiered from his office the supper, desired the ladies to take their places of gentleman-usher to the playhouse, since it was too according to their different age and seniority; for plaid that he had undertaken it with an ill desiga; that it was the way always at his table to pay respect and at the same time ordered the defendant either to to years.' The indictment added, that this pro- marry the said plaintiff, or to pay him half-a-crow duced an unspeakable confusion in the company; for the new pair of gloves and coach-bire that he was for that the ladies, who before had pressed together at the expense of in her service. for a place at the upper end of the table, immediately The lady Townly brought an action of debt crowded with the same disorder towards the end that against Mrs. Flambeau, for that the said Mrs. Flanwas quite opposite; that Mrs. Frontley had the inso- beau had not been to see the lady Towaly, and wish lence to clap herself down at the very lowest place her joy, since her marriage with sir Ralph, notwithof the table; that the widow Partlet seated herself standing sbe, the said lady Townly, had paid Max on the right hand of Mrs. Frontley, alleging for her Flambeau a visit upon her first coming to town. excuse, that no ceremony was to be used at a round It was urged in behalf of the defendant, that the table; that Mrs. Fidget and Mrs. Fescue disputed plaintiff had never given her any regular notice of above half-an-hour for the same chair, and that the her being in town; that the visit she alleged bad latter would not give up the cause until it was de- been made ou Monday, which she knew was a day cided by the parish register, which happened to be on which Mrs. Flambeau was always abroad, having kept hard by. The indictment further saith, that set aside that only day in the week to mind the afthe rest of the company who sat down did it with a fairs of her family; that the servant, who enquired reserve to their right, which they were at liberty to whether she was at home, did not give the visiting assert on another occasion; and that Mrs. Mary knock: that it was not between the hours of five Pippe, an old maid, was placed by the unanimous and eight in the evening: that there were no candles voice of the whole company at the upper end of the lighted up: that it was not on Mrs. Flambeau's day; table, from whence she had the confusion to behold and, in short, that there was not one of the essential several mothers of families among her inferiors.' points observed that constitute a visit. She further The criminal alleged in his defence, that what he proved by her porter's book, which was produced in had done was to raise mirth, and avoid ceremony; court, that she had paid the lady Townly a visit on and that the ladies did not complain of his rudeness the twenty-fourth day of March, just before her until the next morning, having eaten up what he leaving the town, in the year seventeen bundred and had provided for them with great readiness and ala- nine-ten, for which she was still creditor to the said crity.'. The Censor, frowning upon him, told him, lady Townly. To this the plaintiff only replied, that he ought not to discover so much levity in that she was now under covert, and not bable to any matters of a serious nature;' and, upon the jury's debts contracted when she was a single womaa. bringing him in guilty, sentenced him to treat the Mr Bickerstaff finding the case to be very intricate, whole assembly of ladies over again,' and to take and that several points of honour were likely to arise care that he did it with the decorum which was due in it, he deferred giving judgment upon it until the to persons of their quality.

next session day, at which time he ordered the ladies Rebecca Shapely, spinster, was indicted by Mrs. on his left hand to present to the court a table of all Sarah Smack, for speaking many words relecting the laws relating to visits. upon her reputation, and the heels of her silk slip- Winifred Leer brought her action against Riebpers, which the prisoner had maliciously suggested ard Sly for having broken a marriage-contract, and to be two inches higher than they really were. The wedded another woman, after he had engaged him. prosecutor urged, as an aggravation of ber guilt, self to marry the said Winifred Leer. She alleged, that the prisoner was herself guilty of the same kind that he had ogled her twice at an opera, thrice in St. of forgery which she had laid to the prosecutor's James's church, and once at Powel's puppet-sbox, charge; for that she, the said Rebecca Shapely, did at which time he promised her marriage by a sidealways wear a pair of steel bodice, and a false rump. glance, as her friend could testify that sat by her. The Censor ordered the slippers to be produced in Mr. Bickerstaff finding that the defendant had made open court, where the heels were adjudged to be of no further overture of love or marriage but by looks the statutable size. He then ordered the grand jury and ocular engagement--yet at the same time con

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sidering how very apt such impudent seducers are rises as early as he did formerly; and whether the to lead the ladies" hearts astray, ordered the crimi- cock begins to crow at his usual hour. My friend nal 'to stand upon the stage in the Hay-market, has answered me, that his poultry are as regular as between each act of the next opera, there to be ex-ever, and that all the birds and beasts of his neighposed to public view as a false ogler.'

bourhood keep the same hours that they have obUpon the rising of the court, Mr. Bickerstaff hav- served in the memory of man; and the same which, ing taken one of these counterfeits in the very fact, in all probability, they have kept for these five thouas he was ogling a lady of the grand jury, ordered sand years.' him to be seized, and prosecuted upon the statute of If you will see the innovations that have been ogling. He likewise directed the clerk of the court made among us in this particular, you may only look to draw up an edict against these common cheats, into the hours of colleges, where they still dine at that make women believe they are distracted for eleven, and sup at six, which were doubtless the hours them, by staring them out of countenance, and often of the whole nation at the time when those places blast a lady's reputation, whom they never spoke to, were founded. But at present, the courts of justice by saucy looks and distant familiarities.

are scarce opened in Westminster-hall at the time when William Rufus used to go to dinner in it. All

business is driven forward. The landmarks of our No. 263.) THURSDAY, DECEMBER 14, 1710.

fathers, if I may so call them, are removed, and Minimâ contenos nocte Britannos.

planted further up into the day; insomuch, that I am

Juv. Sat. ii. 161. Jafraid our clergy will be obliged, if they expect full Britons contented with the shortest night. congregations, not to look any more upon ten o'clock From my own Apartment, December 13.

in the morning as a canonical hour. In my own

memory, the dinner has crept by degrees from twelve An old friend of mine being lately come to town, o'clock to three, and where it will fix nobody knows. I went to see him on Tuesday, last about eight I have sometimes thought to draw up a memorial o'clock in the evening, with a design to sit with in the behalf of Supper against Dinner-setting him an hour or two, and talk over old stories; but, forth, that the said Dinner has made several enupon enquiry after him, I found he was gone to bed. croachments upon the said Supper, and entered very The next morning, as soon as I was up and dressed, far upon his frontiers ; that he has banished him out and had despatched a little business, I came again of several families, and in all has driven him from to my friend's house about eleven o'clock, with a his head-quarters, and forced him to make his retreat design to renew my visit; but upon asking for him, into the hours of midnight; and, in short, thai he his servant told me he was just sat down to dinner. I is now in danger of being entirely confounded and In short, I found that my old-fashioned friend reli- lost in a breakfast. Those who have read Lucian, giously adhered to the example of his forefathers, and seen the complaints of the letter T against S, and observed the same hours that had been kept in upon account of many injuries and usurpations of the family ever since the conquest.

the same nature, will not, I believe, think such a It is very plain, that the night was much longer memorial forced and unnatural. If dinner bas formerly in this island than it is at present. By the been thus postponed, or, if you please, kept back night, I mean that portion of time which nature has from time to time, you may be sure that it has been thrown into darkness, and which the wisdom of man- in compliance with the other business of the day, kind had formerly dedicated to rest and silence. and that supper has still observed a proportionable This used to begin at eight o'clock in the evening, distance. There is a venerable proverb, which we and conclude at six in the morning. The curfew, have all of us heard in our infancy, of putting the or eight o'clock bell, was the signal throughout the children to-bed, and laying the goose to the fire.' nation for putting out their candles and going to-bed. This was one of the jocular sayings of our forefa

Our grandmothers, though they were wont to sit thers, but may be properly used in the literal sense up the last in the family, were all of them fast asleep at present. Who would not wonder at this per at the same hours that their daughters are busy at verted relish of those who are reckoned the most crimp and basset. Modern statesmen are concerting polite part of mankind, that prefer sea-coals and suhemes, and engaged in the depth of politics, at the candles to the sun, and exchange so many cheerful time when their forefathers were laid down quietly morning hours, for the pleasures of midnight revels to rest, and had nothing in their heads but dreams. and debauches? If a man was only to consult his As we have thus thrown business and pieasure into health, he would choose to live his whole time, if the hours of rest, and by that means made the natu possible, in daylight; and to retire out of the world ral night but half as long as it should be, we are forced into silence and sleep, while the raw damps and unto piece it out with a great part of the morning; so wholesome vapours Ay abroad, without a sun to disthat near two-thirds of the nation lie fast asleep for perse, moderate, or controul' them. For my own several hours in broad day-light. This irregularity part, 1 value an hour in the morning as much as is grown so very fashionable at present, that there is common libertines do an hour at midnight. When scarce a lady of quality in Great Britain that ever I find myself awaked into being, and perceive my saw the sun rise. And, if the humour increases in life renewed within me, and at the same time see the proportion to what it has done of late years, it is whole face of nature recovered out of the dark unnot impossible but our children may hear the bell comfortable state in which it lay for several hours, man going about the streets at nine o'clock in the my heart overflows with such secret sentiments of morning, and the watch making their rounds until joy and gratitude, as are a kind of implicit praise to eleven. This unaccountable disposition in mankind | the great Author of Nature. The mind, in these to continue awake in the night, and sleep in the early seasons of the day, is so refreshed in all its sunshine, has made me enquire, whether the same faculties, and borne up with such new supplies of change of inclination has happened to any other animal spirits, that she finds herself in a state of animals ? For this reason, I desired a friend of youth, especially when she is entertained with the "mine in the country to let me know, whether the lark | breath of Powers, the melody of birds, the dewe that - bang upon the plants, and all those other sweets of known by the name of a story-teller, to be much more nature that are peculiar to the morning.

insufferable than even a prolix writer. An author It is impossible for a man to have this relish of may be tossed out of your hand, and thrown aride being, this exquisite taste of life, who does not come when he grows dull and tiresome; but such liberties into the world before it is in all its noise and hurry; are so far from being allowed towards your orators who loses the rising of the sun-the still hours of the in common conversation, that I have known a chalday; and, immediately upon his first getting up, lenge sent a person for going out of the room plunges himself into the ordinary cares or follies abruptly, and leaving a man of honour in the midst of the world.

of a dissertation. This evil is at present so very I shall conclude this paper with Milton's inimita- common and epidemical, that there is scarce a coffeeble description of Adam's awakening his Eve in house in town that has not some speakers belonging Paradise, which indeed would have been a place as to it, who utter their political essays, and draw paral. little delightful as a barren heath or desert to those lels out of Baker's Chronicle' to almost every part who slept in it. The fondness of the posture in of her majesty's reign. It was said of two ancient which Adam is represented, and the softness of his authors, who had very different beauties in their whisper, are passages in this divine poem that are style, that if you took a word from one of them, above all commendation, and rather to be admired you only spoiled his eloquence; but if you took a than praised.

word from the other, you spoiled his sense. I have Now Mor, her rosy steps in th' eastern clime

often applied the first part of this criticism to several

of these coffee-house speakers whom I have at pre Advancing, sow'd the earth with orient pearl, When Adam wak’d, so custom'd; for his sleep

sent in my thoughts, though the character that is Was airy light from pure digestion bred,

given to the last of those authors, is what I would And temperate vapours bland, which th’only But it is not only public places of resort, but private

recommend to the imitation of my loving countrymen. sound Of leaves and fuming rills, Aurora's fan,

clubs, and conversations over a bottle, that are inLightly dispers’d, and the shrill matin song

fested with this loquacious kind of animal, especially Of birds on every bough; so much the more

with that species which I comprehend under the His wonder was to find unwaken'd Eve,

name of a story-teller. I would earnestly desire With tresses discompos’d, and glowing cheek,

these gentlemen to consider, that no point of wit or As through unquiet rest. He on his side

mirth at the end of a story can atone for the half Leaning, half-rais'd, with looks of cordial love

hour that has been lost before they come at it. I Hung over her enamour'd, and beheld

would likewise lay it home to their serious consideBeauty, which, whether waking or asleep,

ration, whether they think that every man in the Shot forth peculiar graces. Then with voice

company has not a right to speak as well as themMild as when Zephyrus on Flora breathes,

selves? and whether they do not think they are ipHer hand soft touching, whisper’d thus: Awake, vading another man's property, when they engross

the time which should be divided equally among the My fairest, my espous'd, my latest found, Heaven's last best gift, my ever-new delight,

company, to their own private use ? Awake; the morning shines, and the fresh field

What makes this evil the much greater in converCalls us; we lose the prime, to mark how spring endeavour to wind up their

narrations into a point

sation is, that these humdrum companions seldom Our tended plants, how blows the citron grove, What drops the myrth, and what the balmy reed, of mirth or instruction, which might make some How nature paints her colours, how the bee

amends for the tediousnes of them; but think they Sits on the bloom extracting liquid sweets.

have a right to tell any thing that has happened Such whispering wak'd her, but with startled eye fact to be a sufficient foundation for a story, and

within their memory. They look upon matter of On Adam, whom embracing, thus she spake.

O sole! in whom my thoughts find all repose, give us a long account of things, not because they My glory, my perfection, glad I see

are entertaining or surprising, but because they are Thy face, and morn return'd

My ingenious kinsman, Mr. Humphry Wagstaff, Milton's Par. Lost, b. v. 1. 1. &c. used to say, the life of man is too short for a story.

teller.' No. 264.] SATURDAY, DECEMBER 16, 1710.

Methusalem might be half an hour in telling what

o'clock it was: but as for as postdiluvians, we ought Favete linguis

Hor. 1 Od. iü, 2. to do every thing in haste; and in our speeches, as Favour your tongues.

well as actions, remember that our time is short.

A man that talks for a quarter of an hour together From my own Apartment, December 15.

in company, if I meet him frequently, takes op a BOCCALINI, in his ‘Parnassus,' indicts a laconical great part of my span. A quarter of an hour may writer for speaking that in three words which he be reckoned the eight and fortieth part of a day, a might have said in two, and sentences him, for his day the three hundred and sixtieth part of a year, punishment, to read over all the works of Guicciar and a year the threescore and tenth part of life. dini. This Guicciardini is so very prolix and circum- By this moral arithmetic, supposing a man to be in stantial in his writings, that I remember our coun the talking world one third part of the day, whoever tryman, doctor Donne, speaking of that majestic gives another a quarter of an hour's hearing, makes and concise manner in which Moses has described him a sacrifice of more than the four hundred thou. the creation of the world, adds, that if such an sandth part of his conversable life. author as Guicciardini were to have written on such I would establish but one great general rule to be a subject, the world itself would not have been able observed in all conversation, which is this, that to have contained the books that gave the bistory of men should not talk to please themselves, but those its creation.'

that hear them.' This would make them consider, I look upon a tedious talker, or what is generally whether what they speak be worth bearing; wåether

true.

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