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ment is advertising for it in the newspaper no doubt to the companies seemed shy of them. They “bid ten make bullets with to match the infernal poisonous Mexi- dollars through a broker”-it was twelve. “Bid twelve"cans. Gad, we'll give the rascals a taste of their own it was fourteen. Wilkins had had enough of it. He bephysic, nowo, I reckon ! And then do n't they make water- lieved it was "only a bubble blown up to catch the eyes pipes with it
now, and sheetings. And don't they cover of fools. He was done with it." But Jones was down houses with it, and ships; and I guess the time is not far in the morning, as merry as a lark, and as early. He off when government will have her mint on this spot “ knew some of the outsiders, and thought he would catch and what's to hinder us, then from spending our own some of them before the morning was over.” He didcoppers, bran new, ha! ha! If any body here has got a and went home to dinner, having made " a fortunate hit." farm for sale, I'm his man!"
" Five hundred shares," said he, “at fifteen, and the As for buying farms, the thing was perfectly absurd last sale “after board,' nineteen and a half! Four dollars now, and Drawitwell should have known it; for who and fifty cents per share. Five aught is naught ; five could tell that there was not a copper-mine under every fives are twenty-five, five fours are twenty, and two are one of them. It was not to be supposed either that the twenty-two. Twenty-two hundred and fifty dollars good people of Fleeceington could keep the knowledge of that will do for one day, I should say. Wilkins would such extraordinary wealth all to themselves, and our like me to give him half, as we were to have gone in to usually quiet city was all agog, with the wondrous stories gether yesterday, but I wonder what Wilkins ever did for of the extent and richness of the mines; and to confirm its me, that I should give him eleven hundred and twentytruth, Grubemout and Uptosnuff were here with the five dollars! Not quite so green !" charter, and the script elegantly engraved, and any num- The next morning Grubemout brought down some speber of specimens, and copper-buttous confirmatory. cimens, which “he thought” would yield forty per cent.
In a day or two a few shares were in the market at "a if they were assayed, and thought that they ought to make slight advance on the original cost.” Capitalists had been an assessment of a dollar a share, so as to put on more up who thought they “knew a thing or two”_and gud- hands and drive out the ore. Jones said that “that was geons began to nibble, the knowing ones among the right enough." number. The market advanced. One, two, three, four The assessment was called in, at which the stock hesihundred per cent. was quickly achieved as competitors tated for a day or two-made a start and went on—but a increased; and considering that the first cost was perhaps second installment being urged, it faltered a little, and a dollar an acre, for an unwooded, untillable, rocky hill- then stopped. At the third it “declined a shade,” at side, carved up and set down at a dollar per square foot which the " bears” gave a shake and a growl. as original cost," the profit was tempting—the market But Grubemout had—in the nick of time—just reactive-ditto the original holders. There was a fierce ceived a letter from the mines of the most important naavidity for a stock which advanced at such rapid strides, ture, which it would not do to show in the street,' or and the reckless became crazy, the cautious reckless and the stock would be balooning it-Uptosnuff had just made visionary. “The Board”-knowing dogs looked on for a cross-cul." a while doubtfully, but in amazement. The “ Outsiders" “ The deuce he has !" exclaimed Jones, rather nervously. indulged in ecstasies and fanciful millions. Thousands 6 What is that?" were added up upon stock-books, as if they were "trifles "A cross-cut, you see," says Grubemout, “is nothing light as air"--and they were. Merchants cut the shop, more than 6a shaft run at right angles past the old one lawyers the red tape and sheep-skin-editors told the we have been working. He struck some glorious 'de messenger for copy to “go to the devil"--and all became posites,' and—” “gentlemen on 'change." Healths were drank “to the " Why I thought you always said there was a vein, United Copper-Heads”-and champagne and Havanas Grubemout? These deposites are confoundedly leaky and " suffered some." Fun and puns flashed fast and furious treacherous affairs." and all this the while the great bubble rose up, expand- “And so there is a vein, my boy, and we are just geting and beautifying as it ascended.
ting into it; deposites are always the first thing we look It was not to be expected that a single mountain should for in copper mining. As long as we have them we get contain all this good luck exclusively, and in various on swimmingly; but you are so confoundedly skittish! I quarters envious copper-rocks poked their noser out, quite was just going to tell you, that in making the cross-cut,' seductively to anxious companies, who formed upon the Uptosnuff has struck the master rein!' and found an old spot. One gigantic intellect proposed the formation of a drift' in the mountain, which you will see after a while, company to shovel the sand off of the whole State of New
is important. In it he found old hatchets, and hammers, Jersey, so as to get at the substratum, at once and em- and images in copper, supposed to have been the rude phatically. Copper became substantially the great busi- efforts at mining and smelting by the Indians long ago ness of life-the only business of the board the board say before the Dutch had taken Holland, or achieved the being in fact rather a small affair while copper abounded. renowned name of Knickerbockers, and had gone home
Sharp occupied his time in buying up superfluous real copper-fastened." estate, which seemed to have been infected by copper,
Information so desirable as this would work its way out and showed a disposition to rise—and he was afraid it somehow, and gentlemen would now bet you a trifle might go up and never come down again. The convey say champagne and cigars—that a dividend of twenty-five ancers assured him that he ought to take it like a sports- per cent. would be declared on the stock the first year; or man—on the wing, right and left. He did, and clapped a would give you a hundred dollars for agreeing to pay the heavy mortgage on it to keep it steady.
annual dividend on a hundred shares. That disturbed the figures on Flat's memorandum-for Jones is ' satisfied now," and forth with buys five hunhe hoped to have bought and paid for it with his expected dred shares more, as do other Joneses, and Browns, and profit on copper, and to have staggered somebody else's Greens. Outsiders became as plenty as gooseberries, and property with a mortgage from the surplus. It was as verdant; and it would seem, from the number of shares provoking:
reported at the Board, and “after," that certificates had Jones and Wilkins resolved to “take a shy at the quadruplod, and never could multiply fast enough to supply copper anyway, while it was going;" but the stock of all the demand. Indeed, as one old gentleman was heard to end a prolonged whistle, by exclaiming-—"Gas!" the importance to the company to have a small engine and an market became so inflated that the Joneses, Browns, and iron pump erected at the mines at once, as the richest ore Greens, declined the attempt of cornering the stock, in is always found below water level ! despair.
Jones--the active, energetic Jones" had no doubt of “ The company," called for an additional installment at it at all. The Cornish miners assured him, when he was once. " Why, what the deuce," asks Jones, “ does the up, that as soon as they got below water level, they would company want with more installments? Hav n't they got come to something that could n't be trified with. If Wilcopper enough!"
kins was n't a fool he would go in soon, before it gets out." “Copper ore, my dear fellow," responded Grubemout. Uptosnuff, too, had had a quantity of the late ore assay“Yes, lots of it. But Uptosnuff wasn't brought up in a ed, and Professor Stuffemwell, Geologist to Her Majesty, Cornish mine for nothing. The furnaces at Baltimore and thought it would do bravely. If ore that yielded fifty per Boston want it for half-price, but as they are nearly out, cent. would not, he would like to know how her majesty's we intend to make them smoke, ha! ha! But we must go subjects got rich, after paying the miners, on mines that to the expense of an " adale” in the meanwhile.
yield but fifteen per cent. “Why, what's the use of that—what good will that Copper buttons now replenished the pockets of dealers, do?") asks Jones. " What is an adate, anyway?”
and the stock made several violent gasps and starts for a Poor Jones had a good deal yet to learn about copper
desirable existence. But it was consumptive-evidently mining, and felt naturally alarmed at these ominous terms. going into a rapid decline. The crushing process and the The “cross-cut” was the beginning of puzzlers. He had iron pump having depressed its spirits, and exhausted still yet to see-I may as well say he ultimately did see, “the further its vital energy. drift," to help along “ the pumps," as well as the adate Grubemout thought that if the buttons were pressed with installments, and to become familiar with a variety into bars, and shown upon Change it might be encouragof mining lore, which assists knowledge in its acquisition, ing, and mitigate the violence of the disease; but some by obligingly allowing us to pay for it. But I believe he wag of a broker suggested that it was a BAR sinister;" never did understand “what they wanted with so many which remark sinister ruffled the backs of the bars, caused work-shops--he thought they were miners !!!
the bulls to toss their horns unpleasantly, and shook still " An adate, Jones, is only a drain to relieve the mine further the liveliness of the stock, which drooped visibly when it is overcharged with water."
under the imputation. " Oh! is that all!"
Even Jones—the ardent, trustful Jones-got earnestly But this calling in of installments seems to be a sort of anxious about the state of the patient, and " suggested a patent condenser in the stock market, and shows with consultation." how much force a given quantity of air can be squeezed Brown was full of good intentions, but pleaded deinto a given compass.
bility of the pocket, which, under heavy depletion, was Grubemout was as active as a bee at sunrise, and offered rather low." his advice gratuitously—but “confidentially”-to any Green was a little vivacious, and "suggested a new number of anxious inquirersbut some of them having a cross-cut." copper-mine of their own, by the attractive and taking Grubemout was pleased with the idea, and hinted at "a name of “ Penny-wise Company," and others having new installment.” taken a snap with the “Alligator Mountain Company," Uptosnuff had “missed the stage, and was unable to and not liking the bite they received, shook their heads at get down to the meeting.” Fleeceington and looked knowing—the “New Jersey.” Wilkins, in answer to a pressing invitation to " come chaps were quite sprightly, for as their lille covered the in," was busy selling goods." whole State, they had a fair chance of realizing some- Sharp would not attend—" he had never had any thing thing when the “Mammoth Shoveling Company” got to to do with the rascally copper, and found his real estate work, and lifted the crust off.
bad enough just now." Grubemout assured them on his honor”--that “the Flat “ had enough of copper stock-it was not very Company did not intend to sell an ounce of its ore to heavy, to be sure, having rather a tendency to dissolve the furnaces. They intended to have a crushing ma- into air, its original element, but he was satisfied.” chine' of their own erected at once, and proceed in a style The Stocko grew feebler after consultation, as patients that would soon settle the whole business."
are apt to, in critical cases, from want of remedy. Jones was “ready for any number of crushers or The Bulls looked surly, as if they had been disappointed smashers, grinders or pounders. Head up the creek—dam in pasture. it! Put up the water-works and the mill-wheel, and give The Bears were as frisky as it is possible to be on a it to the blasted furnaces! Carry the war into Africa!" frosty morning, and were so much in their own element, said he.
that you looked involuntarily around for floating icebergs The installment to carry on the adate was paid, though-and copper in this temperature of the atmosphere sunk it depressed the stock, but Jones could not see how hav- | into a torpor. ing paid the company five thousand dollars in installments On Change, in this changing world of ours, copper should depress his stock in the market. “Hang it!" said looked blue. he, “ the company is that much richer in property and ex- The Outsiders had rubbed out their pencil-marks on stock cavations, and do n't I belong to the company-have n't I memorandums, and dissipating the written evidence of a thousand shares ? It's only paying money out of one thousands that had vanished into air, they themselves pocket, and putting into the other. Wilkins may laugh, vanished. It was needless to say any thing to them about but he's a fool! That's a capital idea about the furnace. copper, they " never had any thing to do with it, beyond You 're a boy, Uptosnuff-you are?”
a hundred shares or so, which they sold out before the The installment for crushing purposes was soon called
bubble looked like bursting.” Stockdom was desolate, in also, and paid, though the stock looked sickly, and save that a few of the bears showed their teeth, and grintrembled as if it had the ague, or had passed through a ned as furiously as if they had just arrived fresh from the crushing process on its own hook. It was just composing Polar regions, and had brought any quantity of wet itself when Uptosnuff discovered that it was of the highest blankets with them. Yet they looked as if they would
rather than not that any denler in copper should take hold, and productive Copper Mine, just incorporated by an act of them. The bulls were more plentiful-looked savage of the Legislature, under the name, style and title, to wit: but knowing, but showed no sposition to dash at imagi
“ The Grand Open Sesame and United Catchem Copper nary enemies in scarlet, having rather a taste left for their Mining, Crushing, Stamping, Pumping and Smelting friends, the Browns and the Greens, who were urgently en- Сотро ry," treated to “come in again, and help sustain the market."
Christian Grubemont, Eliakim Uptosnuff, J. Drawitwell, The case was desperate, and desperate remedies were
T. Crispin and John Smith, the original incorporators of resolved on. It was deemed advisable to “ask the opinion
the Company, after regaling themselves, proceeded to the of the directors !"
election of officers, and knowing that in the goodly city of The directors “have no opinion of the stock! They
Philadelphia there were a number of persons by the names never had," of their own. They trusted to Grubemout,
of Jones, Brown and Green, and not a few Sharps and to Uptosnuff, to the Cornish miners. Their geological
Flats, they, in order to avoid giving offence, placed in a and mineralogical education, had been shockingly neglect- hat the whole of the names, as above, found in the Direced in their youth, and they have verified the fact, by having on their hands, a thousand shares apiece at high tory, (significant of the office they were to hold,) and drew
the following first three names, A. Jones, B. Flat, c. prices, by having assisted to sustain the market in the
Green, directing them to supply vacancies, and to fill advarious stages of the experiment. But “they would like
ditions to the number of five; adding in the meanwhile to know who were the original stockholders of the com
the names of the first two corporators, as ex-officio dipany who did them the honor to elect them."
rectors, to conduct silently the operations of the mines, Grubemout “thought it of the highest importance that
and to enlighten the others as to the true plan of working they should know, and as the original book of minutes
copper-mines profitably and efficiently. was up at the mines, and as he was going up by the next
(Signed) C. GRUBEMOUT, Pres'i. stage, he would write and send them.”
E. UPTOSNUFF, Sec'ry. It would be, perhaps, as well to give his letter:
The cleverness and explicitness of the whole transaction Fleeceington, Dec. 10, 18—.
showed that it had been done neatly; and the Directors GENTLEMEN,-I arrived safely at the mines last eve
with singular unanimity felt themselves included in the ning, after rather a fatiguing journey by stage, and found,
operation. to my unspeakable amazement, that Uptosnuff had ex
There can be no doubt that Grubernout and Uptosnuff hausted the vein, and that as no more deposites are to be
are among the “plucers” in California. The one being found, he had thought it advisable to abandon the mine.
undeniably the man who sold the two barrels of brandy, The tools, viz. four pickaxes, three shovels, and two
by installments of a thimblefull at a time, for $14,000—the wheelbarrows-rather dilapidated—the property of the
other, with positive certainty, we aver to have been the company, I have put under shelter, to preserve them from
man who “ confidentially" communicated the following the weather-subject to your order or disposal. The iron
ilem to the newspaper press, and he must have been there pump I should have removed ulso, but being rather heavy,
to have seen it: in the absence of the hands—who have gone back to their
"[The Bigest Lump Yet ?- The following is about farms I found it impossible to take in. It cannot, how
the latest news from the gold diggins that we have seen ever, suffer from rust more than ten per cent., and as the recorded in the papers:' A runaway soldier is said to original cost was but seventy dollars, the loss to the com
have discovered a lump or a rock of gold that weighed 889 pany will be inconsiderable. There is a trifle of two hun
pounds and 111 ounces; he was afraid to leave it, and
mounted guard upon it, and at the latest dates he had sat dred dollars due, for boarding the hands, to the host of the there 17 days; bad offered $27,000 for a plate of pork and “Roaring Lion," who will forward you his account by beans, but had been indignantly refused, and laughed at this mail. As Uptosnuff and myself have suffered a great ou, where this article was said to be more abundant!"
for the niggardliness of his offer, by parties going further deal from anxiety, and exposure in the mines of the com
Jones is among the lame ducks, and pretty roughly pany, we deem it proper to seek a more genial clime.
plucked at that. But he still avers that if the furuaces Any little complimentary remuneration which you may
had ouly paid a good price for the ore at the outset, or Bee proper to bestow on us, you will please enclose to
Wilkins had only helped him to sustain the market when Mr. Drawitwell, of the Hawk and Buzzard, to whom we
he asked him, he should have been the master of a pretty are indebted for various little civilities, in the shape of
suug little fortune. If he only had it now, he would char. breakfast, dinner and supper, for the past six months, and
ter a steamer, and take his own freight and passengers for which no doubt the generosity of your complimentary
the gold mines. donation will amply cover.
The Hawk and Bazzard appears to have been “ pidgeonEnclosed are " the original minutes." Uptosnuff wishes
ed," for the last time I passed that way the house was to be remembered by you. I join in the same prayer.
shut up. The business having amused itself by stepping Yours, as ever,
over to the Roaring Lion, while the Hawk and Buzzard CHRISTIAN GRUBEMOUT, Pres't.
had flown to the city, “ to watch the market." To the Directors, Stockholders, etc.
Crispin " would only like to have one of those fellows P.S. Please ask Jones to think of us. Not that it is
tied for a while, until he had expressed his opinion on him
with a stirrup." any of our business, but would like to know whether he ever divided with Wilkins-it would be civil, you know.
Smith appears to be solicitous to “ make them intiRegards to the Bulls. Uptosnuff says ditto to the Bears,
mately acquainted with the red-hot end of a poker-heid for there is no knowing when one may want a friend, and
smelt 'em, dam 'em, and crush 'em too!”
The “ Dam," the "Drift," the “Cross-Cut," the " Iron civility costs nothing.
Pump” and the “ Adate," you can see as you go woodMixutes, First MEETING.–At a large and enthusiastic cock shooting next August—but the “ Steam-Engine' and meeting of the joyous and delighted inhabitants of the the “Mill-Wheel” never arrived, owing to some infor. charming and romantic village of Fleeceington, held at mality in the order given to the mechanics. “ The Hawk and Buzzard Hotel,” to elect officers for the “ The CRUSHER,” it is supposed, is in California with newly discovered, freshly chartered, and highly valuable I its friends.
G. R. G.
Boulevart Si Martin. 61.
Fleurs de Chagon aine, 2. kucheleu, 87.Pentelles de violard, 2. Thorsrul, 9..