66 bargain? What am I to pine for a girl that is willing to go to bed to me? Love of all things!-My dear Beaufort, one fees fo many breathing raptures about each other before marriage, and dinning their infipidity into the ears of all their acquaintance : "My dear "Ma'am, don't you think him a fweet man? a charm❝inger creature never was." Then he, on his fideMy life! my angel! oh! fhe's a paradife of everblooming fweets." And then in a month's time, "He's a perfidious wretch! I wish I had never seen his "facethe devil was in me when I had any thing to "fay to him."---Oh! damn her for an inanimated "pieceI wifh fhe'd poifon'd herself, with all my "heart." That is ever the way; and fo you fee love is all nonsense; well enough to furnish romances for boys and girls at circulating libraries; that is all, take my word for it. ་ Beau. Pho! this is all idle talk; and in the mean time I am ruin'd. Wild. How fo? Beau. Why, you know the old couple have bargain'd your fifter away. Wild. Bargain'd her away! and will you pretend you are in love! -Can you look tamely on, and fee her barter'd away at Garraway's, like logwood, cochineal, or indigo? Marry her privately, man, and keep it a secret till my affair is over. Beau. My dear Wilding, will you propofe it to her? I'll tell you what, if she has a fancy for you, carry her off at once- -But perhaps fhe has a mind to this cub of a citizen, Mifs Sally's brother. Beau. Oh, no! he's her averfion. Wild. I have never feen any of the family, but my wife that is to be-my father-in-law and my brother-inlaw, I know nothing of them. What fort of a fellow is the fon? Beau. Oh! a diamond of the firft water! a buck, Sir! a blood! every night at this end of the town; at twelve next day he fneaks about the 'Change, in a little bit of a frock and a bob-wig, and looks like a fedate bookkeeper in the eyes of all who behold him. A 2 Wild Wild. Upon my word, a gentleman of fpirit. Beau. Spirit!he drives a phaeton two ftory high, keeps his girl at this end of the town, and is the gay George Philpot all round Covent-Garden. Wild. Oh, brave!--and the father Beau. The father, Sir-But here comes Maria take his picture from her. [She fings within. Wild. Hey! fhe is mufical this morning;-fhe holds her ufual fpirits, I find. Beau. Yes, yes, the spirit of eighteen, with the idea of a lover in her head. Wild. Ay, and fuch a lover as you too!-though ftill in her teens, fhe can play upon all your foibles, and treat you as she does her monkey,-tickle you, torment you, enrage you, footh you, exalt you, depress you, pity you, laugh at you Ecce fignum. Enter Maria finging. The fame giddy girl! dear •Sifter; come, my Maria. Have done, brother; let me have my own way-I will go through my fong. Wild. I have not feen you this age;-ask me how I do? Maria. I won't ask you how you do—I won't take any notice of you-I don't know you. Wild. Do you know this gentleman then? Will you fpeak to him? 'tis Maria. No, I won't speak to him; I'll fing to himmy humour to fing. [Sings. Beau. Be ferious but for a moment, Maria; my all depends upon it. Maria. Oh, fweet Sir! you are dying, are you? then pofitively I will fing the fong; for it is a defcription of yourfelf-mind it, Mr Beaufort-mind it-Brother, how do you do? (kiffes him.) Say nothing; don't interrupt me. [Sings. Wild. Have you feen your city lover yet? Maria. No; but I long to fee him; I fancy he is a curiofity. Beau. Long to see him, Maria? Maria. Yes, long to fee him-(Beaufort fiddles with bis lip, and looks thoughtful.) Brother, brother! (goes to him him foftly, beckons him to look at Beaufort) do you fee that? (mimicks him) mind him; ha, ha! Beau. Make me ridiculous if you will, Maria, fo you don't make me unhappy by marrying this citizen. Maria. And would not you have me marry, Sir? What, I muft lead a fingle life to please you, muft I?› -Upon my word,, you are a pretty gentleman to make laws for me. [Sings. Can it be or by law or by equity faid, That a comely young girl ought to die an old maid? Wild. Come, come, Mifs Pert, compose yourself a little-this will never do. Maria. My crofs, ill-natur'd brother! but it will do -Lord! what, do you both call me hither to plague me? I won't stay among ye-à l'honeur, à l'honeur(running away) à l'honeur.. Wild. Hey, hey, Mifs Notable! Madam, come back Maria: Lord of heaven! what do come back; pray, [Forces her back: you want? Wild. Come, come, truce with your frolics, Mifs Hoy.. den, and behave like a fenfible girl; we have ferious bu-finefs with you. Maria. Have you? Well, come, I will be fenfible-there, I blow all my folly aw-Tis gone, 'tis gone-and now I'll talk. fenfe; come -Is that a fenfible: face? Wild. Po, po, be quiet, and rear what we have to say to you. Maria. I will, I am quiet. 'Tis charming weather; it will be good for the country, this will. Wild. Po, ridiculous! how can you be fo filly? Maria. Blefs me! I never faw any thing like you there is no fuch thing as fatisfying you I am fure it was very good fenfe what I faidPapa talks in that manner- -Well, well, I'll be filent then-I won't speak. at all: Will that fatisfy you? [Looks fullens Wild. Come, come, no more of this folly, but mind what is faid to you-You have not feen your city-lover,, you say? [Maria shrugs her shoulders, and shakes her heads: Wild. Why don't you anfwer? Beau. My dear Maria, put me out of pain. Wilds. Wild. Poh, don't be fo childish, but give a rational anfwer. Maria. Why, no, then; no- -no, no, no, no, no, I tell you no, no, no. Wild. Come, come, my little giddy fifter, you muft not be fo flighty; behave fedately, and don't be a girl always. Maria. Why, don't I tell you I have not seen himbut I am to fee him this very day. Beau. To fee him this day, Maria! Maria. Ha, ha!-look there, brother; he is beginning again-But don't fright yourself, and I'll tell you all about it- -My papa comes to me this morning-by the bye, he makes a fright of himself with this ftrange. drefs Why does not he dress as other gentlemen do, brother? Wild. He dreffes like his brother fox-hunters in Wiltfhire. Maria. But when he comes to town, I wish he would do as other gentlemen do here I am almost asham'd of him- -But he comes to me this morning"Hoic, hoic! our Moll- Where is the fly pufs"Tally ho!"-Did you want me, papa? ." Come "hither, Moll, I'll gee you a husband, my girl; one that "has mettle enow-he'll take cover, I warrant un"Blood to the bone." Beau. There now, Wilding, did not I tell you this? Wild. Where are you to fee the young citizen? Maria. Why, papa will be at home in an hour, and then he intends to drag me into the city with him, and there the fweet creature is to be introduced to meThe old gentleman his father is delighted with me ;. but I hate him, an old ugly thing. Wild. Give us a defcription of him; I want to know him. Maria. Why, he looks like the picture of Avarice, fitting with pleasure upon a bag of money, and trembling for fear any body fhould come and take it awayHe has got fquare-toed fhoes, and little tiny buckles; a brown coat, with fmall round brafs buttons, that looks as if it was new in my great-grandmother's time, and bis face all shrivell❜d and pinch'd with care; and he shakes his his head like a Mandarine upon a chimney-piece"Ay, ay, Sir Jafper, you are right"-and then he grins. at me" I profess she is a very pretty bale of goods. "Ay, ay, and my fon Bob is a very fenfible lad-ay, 66 ay, and I will underwrite their happiness for one and, a half per cent." Wild. Thank you, my dear girl; thank you for this account of my relations. Beau. Deftruction to my hopes!-Surely, my dearlittle angel, if you have any regard for me Maria. There, there, there he is frighten'd again. [Sings, Deareft creature, &c.. Wild. Pfha! give over these airs- -listen to me, and I'll inftruct you how to manage them all. Maria. Óh, my dear brother! you are very goodbut don't mistake yourfelf;-though juft come from a boarding-fchool, give me leave to manage for myfelf.There is in this cafe a man I like, and a man I don't like -It is not you I like (to Beaufort)-no-no-I hate But let this little head alone; I know what to do I fhall know how to prefer one, and get rid of the other. you Beau. What will you do, Maria? Maria. Ha, ha, I can't help laughing at you. [Sings. Do not grieve me, Oh, relieve me, &c. Wild. Come, come, be ferious, Mifs Pert, and I'll inftru&t you what to do The old cit, you fay, admires you for your understanding; and his fon would not marry you, unless he found you a girl of fenfe and fpirit. Maria. Even fo-this is the character of your giddy fifter. Wild. Why then, I'll tell you-You fhall make him hate you for a fool, and so let the refusal come from him felf. Maria. But how-how, my dear brother? Tell me how? Wild. Why, you have feen a play with me, where a man pretends to be a downright country oaf, in order to rule a wife and have a wife. Maria. Very well-What then? what then?-Oh !— I have it-I understand you-fay no more-'tis charm, |