Maria, Servants, &c. Mr Packer. Mr Woodward. Mr Baker. Mr Vaughan. Mr Coftollo. WOMEN. Edinburgh, 1782. Mifs Elliot, Mrs Mattocks. Mrs Kniveton. A C T I. YOUNG WILDING, BEAUFORT, and WILL following. WILDING. H like you, melted down into a fighing, love-fick dangler after a high heel, a well-turn'd ankle, and a fhort petticoat! Beau. Pry'thee, Wilding, don't laugh at me-Maria's charms Wild. Maria's charms! And fo now you would fain grow wanton in her praife, and have me liften to your VOL. III. raptures A raptures about my own fifter! Ha, ha, poor Beaufort! - Is my fifter at home, Will? Wild. Very well. Pray, give Mr Beaufort's compli~ ments to my fifter, and he is come to wait upon her.(Exit Will.) You will be glad to fee her, I fuppofe, Charles. Beau. I live but in her prefence. Wild. Live but in her prefence! How the devil could the young baggage raise this riot in your heart? "Tis more than her brother could ever do with any of her fex. Beau. Nay, you have no reason to complain; you are come up to town, poft-hafte, to marry a wealthy citizen's daughter, who only faw you laft feafon at Tunbridge, and has been languishing for you ever fince. Wild. 'Tis more than I do for her; and, to tell you the truth, more than I believe the does for me-This is a match of prudence, man! bargain and fale! My reverend dad and the old put of a citizen finished the businefs at Lloyd's coffee-house by inch of candle—a mere transferring of property!" Give your fon to my "daughter, and I will give my daughter to your fon." That's the whole affair; and so I am just arrived to confummate the nuptials. Beau. Thou art the happiest fellow Wild. Happy! fo I am-what fhould I be otherwife for? If Mifs Sally-upon my foul, I forget her name Beau. Well! that is fo like pot. you Mifs Sally Phil -Mifs Sally Philpot. -fhe Wild. Ay! very true will bring fortune fufficient to pay off an old incumbrance upon the family-eftate, and my father is to fettle handfomely upon me and so I have reafon to be contented, have not I? Beau. And you are willing to marry her without having one fpark of love for her? Wild. Love!-why, I make myself ridiculous enough by marrying, don't I, without being in love into the bargain? bargain? What am I to pine for a girl that is willing to go to bed to me? Love of all things!-My dear Beaufort, one fees fo many breathing raptures about each other before marriage, and dinning their infipidity into the ears of all their acquaintance: "My dear "Ma'am, don't you think him a fweet man? a charminger creature never was." Then he, on his fide---"My life! my angel! oh! fhe's a paradife of ever"blooming fweets." And then in a month's time, "He's a perfidious wretch! I wish I had never feen his face- the devil was in me when I had any thing to "fay to him.". "Oh! damn her for an inanimated I wifh fhe'd poifon'd herself, with all my heart." That is ever the way: and fo you fee love is all nonfenfe; well enough to furnish romances for boys and girls at circulating libraries; that is all, take my word for it. piece. Beau. Pho! this is all idle talk; and in the mean time I am ruin'd. Wild. How fo? Beau. Why, you know the old couple have bargain'd your fifter away. Wild. Bargain'd her away! and will you pretend you are in love? -Can you look tamely on, and fee her barter'd away at Garraway's, like logwood, cochineal, or indigo? Marry her privately, man, and keep it a fecret till my affair is over. Beau. My dear Wilding, will you propose it to her? Wild. With all my heart-She is very long a-coming I'll tell you what, if fhe has a fancy for you, carry her off at once- -But perhaps fhe has a mind to this cub of a citizen, Mifs Sally's brother. Beau. Oh, no! he's her averfion. Wild. I have never feen any of the family, but my wife that is to be-my father-in-law and my brotherin-law, I know nothing of them. What fort of a fellow is the fon? Beau. Oh! a diamond of the firft water! a buck, Sir! a blood! every night at this end of the town; at twelve next day he fneaks about the 'Change, in a little bit of a frock and a bob-wig, and looks like a fedate bookkeeper in the eyes of all who behold him. A 2 Wild. Wild. Upon my word, a gentleman of spirit. Beau. Spirit! -he drives a phaeton two story high, keeps his girl at this end of the town, and is the gay George Philpot all round Covent-Garden. Wild. Oh, brave!and the father Beau. The father, Sir-But here comes Maria; take his picture from her. [She fings within.] Wild. Hey! fhe is musical this morning; fhe holds her ufual spirits, I find. Beau. Yes, yes, the spirit of eighteen, with the idea of a lover in her head. Wild. Ay, and such a lover as you too! tho' ftill in her teens, the can play upon all your foibles, and treat you as fhe does her monkey, tickle you, torment you, enrage you, footh you, exalt you, depress you, pity you, laugh at you-Ecce fignum! Enter Maria finging. Wild. The fame giddy girl!Sifter; come, my dear Maria. Have done, brother; let me have my own way-I will go through my fong. Wild. I have not feen you this age; ask me how I do? Maria. I won't ask you how you do-I won't take any notice of I don't know you. you, Wild. Do you know this gentleman then? Will you fpeak to him? Maria. No, I won't speak to him; I'll fing to him; 'tis my humour to fing. [Sings.] Beau. Be ferious but for a moment, Maria; my all depends upon it. Maria. Oh! fweet Sir, you are dying, are you? then pofitively I will fing the fong; for it is a defcription of yourfelf-mind it, Mr Beaufort-mind it-Brother, how do you do? [kisses him.] Say nothing; don't interrupt me [Sings.] Wild. Have you feen your city lover yet? Maria. No; but I long to fee him; I fancy he is a curiofity. Beau. Long to fee him, Maria ! Maria. Yes, long to fee him-[Beaufort fiddles with his lip, and looks thoughtful.] Brother, brother! [goes to him foftly, beckons him to look at Beaufort] do you fee that? [mimicks him] mind him; ha, ha. Beau. Make me ridiculous if you will, Maria, fo you don't make me unhappy by marrying this citizen. Maria. And would not you have me marry, Sir? What, I must lead a fingle life to please you, muft I? Upon my word, you are a pretty gentleman to make laws for me. [Sings.] Can it be or by law or by equity faid, That a comely young girl ought to die an old maid? Wild. Come, come, Mifs Pert, compofe yourself a little-this will never do. Maria. My crofs, ill-natur'd brother! but it will do -Lord! what, do you both call me hither to plague me? I won't ftay anong ye-à l'honeur, à l'honeur [running away] à l'boneur. Wild. Hey, hey, Mifs Notable! come back; pray, Madam, come back-[Forces her back.] Maria. Lord of heaven! what do you want? Wild. Come, come, truce with your frolics, Mifs Hoy den, and behave like a fenfible girl; we have ferious bu finefs with you. Maria. Have you? Well, come, I will be fenfiblethere, I blow all my folly away-'Tis gone, 'tis gone, and now I'll talk fenfe; comeIs that a fenfible face? Wild. Po, po, fay to you. be quiet, and hear what we have to Maria. I will, I am quiet. 'Tis charming weather; it will be good for the country, this will. Wild. Po, ridiculous! how can you be fo filly? Maria. Blefs me! I never faw any thing like you— there is no fuch thing as fatisfying you-I am fure it was very good fenfe what I faid-Papa talks in that manner- -Well, well, I'll be filent then-I won't speak at all: Will that fatisfy you? [Looks fullen.] Wild. Come, come, no more of this folly, but mind what is faid to you-You have not feen your city-lover, you fay! [Maria shrugs her shoulders, and shakes her head.] Wild. Why don't you anfwer? Beau. My dear Maria, put me out of pain. [Maria fhrugs her shoulders again. A 3 |