PORTRAITS OF MATRIMONY. "But happy they, the happiest of their kind, affection between husband and wife, is the source of uneasiness not only to the parties themselves, but to all their acquaintances. We must always condemn, despise, or pity the unfortunate pair: and as these feel Whom gentler stars unite, and in one fate ings blend." IT is generally acknowledged, that upon good or bad fortune in forming the matrimonial connection, depends the greater part of human happiness, or misery. Where mutual esteem, sympathy, and confidence, unite together the husband and wife, they are, in a great measure, independent of the world. The accidental unfortunate occurrences with which they must occasionally meet, are to them only as the report of distant enemies, or foreign wars: the unpleasing intelligence may give a momentary uneasiness, but as there is peace at home, tranquillity is soon resumed. Nay, there is something so amiable in genuine, unaffected, modest love, that it blesses not only the married pair, whom it unites together, but all who have the good fortune to be witnesses of their happiness. we, universally depart with dissatisfaction, if not disgust, from the scene, in which they are called into exercise. Having, of late, experienced very forcibly the effect of both of these pictures, my attention was naturally directed to the consideration of those shades and colourings that constitute their difference. In other words, I was led to enquire, what is it in the conduct of husband or wife, that renders their company such a source of pleasure or pain, admiration or disgust, to their friends and acquaintances. Reviewing for this purpose my intercourse and acquaintance with two families-the one the most finished and happy, the other the most unfortunate portrait of married life, I was induced to extend my observations, and take in all the intermediate gradations between matrimonial happiness and misery, And, having commenced with the happy picture, I proceeded, by inquiring what were the cir cumstances that prevented the other family in question from appearing to the same advantage, as a matrimonial portrait. The following sketches are therefore copied from liv the evident want of harmony and ing originals; and are the result of We are pleased with them, be cause they seem pleased with each other, participating, as it were, in the happiness we admire; we never fail by the contemplation of such a scene, to become better satisfied with ourselves, and all the world besides. Discord, on the contrary, or BELFAST MAG, NO. Xxxvi. real observation. And in hopes that they may be the means of assisting young persons in forming fortunate matrimonial connections, or making the best of those already formed, they are offered to publicity through the medium of your magazine: Portrait 1st. HORATIO is a man who received a polite, if not liberal education, and entered into business at an early period of life. Contrary to the practice of the greater part of men in business, Horatio continued at every leisure interval to prosecute the study of polite and elegant literature. By this means his mind be came susceptible of other emotions, besides those occasioned by profit and loss, and he learned that life has greater enjoyments for rational creaturesthan the consciousness of having made an advantageous market, swindled successfully at cards, or drunk all his companions asleep. Horatio felt that he was formed for the noblest society, that society which is founded upon esteem, sympathy and benevolence. His soul sighed for the soothing endearments of female friendship, and was if possible in love with love, even before acquaintance with Evelina, had actually inspired him with that passion. Evelina though an only daughter, was remarkable for unassuming modesty, and engaging sweetness of disposi tion, whence it may be inferred she was very liberally endued with natural understanding. She was not a poetical beauty, though as nearto it as most of the daughters of Eve. And, as every expressive feature was a hieroglyphic for good sense or good nature, Horatio at their very first acquaintance, recognized her as the person whom he had loved by anticipation, and of whom he had been in search for a considerable time. He therefore immediately cast all his earthly hopes of happiness upon the chance of obtaining her as the friend of his bosom, and the partner of his comforts. It is easy to see that two such kindred souls, could not be long acquainted without a sentimental union. Horatio's feelings took every opportunity of acquainting Evelina with his partiality for her; and she only waited to be fully convinced of this partiality, before acknowledging for him a similar feeling. They were accordingly married, and in discharging the respective duties of their station, particularly in their attention to each other, and to six lovely children, they exhibit that amiable picture which I have often contemplated with unmixed satisfaction and pleasure; and of which the following is a faint outline.. The author of our nature, and of the institution of marriage, has declared the relation between husband and wife to be such, that they are no longer two, but one. One for instance in affection, one in counsel, one in happiness, and in a great measure one in hopes. Now the finest illustration of this declaration is the conduct of Horatio and Evelina towards each other. They appear to be actuated only by one soul, and in all things to have the most perfect understanding of each others inclinations. The love by which they are united is of that dignified kind, that is gratified, not so much by possessing, as by being enabled through that possession, to render its object happy. We never therefore see between them individual feeling produce mutual dissatisfaction; or the wants and antipathies of the one, opposed with acrimony to those of the other. On the contrary, there is an evident anxious solicitude on the part of each to sacrifice their own private or par ticular predi'ections, to those of the other. Whilst these sacrifices are made, not with the look, tone, or gesture of one ostentatiously sacrificing feeling at the altar of peace, and meritoriously doing an obliging act, at the expense of painful self-denial; but with the placid readiness of a person wishing to oblige; and the cheerful complaisance of one whose chief delight it is to be the means of another's happiness Gentle altercations, I have occasion ally seen take place between them; and the reasons by which their respective opinions were supported, compared together, with considerable earnestness and spirit. The design of each, however, in such contentions, it was easy to see, was not to gain a selfish victory, or triumph over the others weakness, and confessed inferiority; but solely to prevent, or remove a mistake, and arrive at truth, and correctness. The opinion of each was offered with the most conciliating gentleness. The tone and look, with which it was accompanied, were strongly expressive of regret for the difference of sentiment. Every circumstance of any weight in the arguments of either, was, with a solicitous candour, admitted by the other; and when any obvious or ludicrous mistake was detected, it was the source of as much amusement and pleasure to the author as the detector. In a word, the very differences that occasionally arise between Horatio and Evelina, are conducted in such a manner, are so fraught with mutual love and confidence, and are, in general, so productive of cheerfulness and good humour, that they are the source of much pleasure and gratification to an occasional visitor. They are such interruptions of the general agreement as give no disturbance, or if we may use a simile, they are like certain discords, in some pieces of music, which, though in their nature highly disa greeable from their situation, and the manner of their introduction, contribute no inconsiderable share to the general harmonic effect. It is im duced by him for the first time to To a friend of Horatio's, when introEvelina, their union or sympathy of soul is truly delightful. Though to her an utter stranger, he soon finds himself on the footing of an intimate of his introduction the rank he holds friend. Learning from the manner in her husband's estimation, and imin hers, she treats him with all the mediately giving him the same place attention and tenderness due to an intimate friend of her own possible to describe the satisfaction a person in such a situation experiences. Evelina seems so charmed with the visit, and to take so much tor, that he feels, instead of the cause pleasure in her attentions to the visiof embarrassment and trouble, the occasion of happiness and delight. Evelina's looks speak nothing but affection for Horatio, and good will towards his guest. By an intuitive sympathy impossible to be described, she anticipates her husband's wishes, and fulfills all his intentions respecting his friend. Indeed the whole of her tuation cannot fail of calling up to conduct and demeanor in such a sithe mind of him who has read the scriptures, Solomon's beautiful description of the virtuous woman. "The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her; she openeth her mouth in wisdom, and in her tongue is the law of kindness." Whilst the conduct of Horatio is the best comment upon the Apostolic exhortation. "Husbands love and cherish your wives, even as yourselves." The mutual affection that thus characterizes every part of the conduct of Horatio and Evelina, is, as might be expected, productive of the happiest effect upon their children. |