gains, and double entendre, and Kibers, and "Qadpisngiqu☺, all derived from the faid fources, 4. The FINICAL Style.

which confifts of the most curious, affected, mincing metaphors, and partakes of the alamode. As this, of a brook dried by the fun. Won by the fummer's importuning ray, Th' eloping ftream did from her channel firay, And with enticing fun beams flole away *.

Of an easy Death.

When watchful death fhall on his harvest look,
And see thee ripe with age, invite the hook;
He'll gently cut thy bending falk, and thee
Lay kindly in the grave, his granary †,

Of Trees in a Storm.

Oaks whose extended arms the winds defy,
The tempeft fees their strength, and fighs, and
paffes by I.

Of water fimmering over the fire.

The fparkling flames raise water to a smile,
Yet the pleas'd liquor pines, and leffens all the
while T.

5. LASTLY, I fhall place the COMBROUS, which moves heavily under a load of metaphors, and draws after it a long train of words. And the 'BUSKIN, or fately, frequently and with great felicity mixed with the former. For as the first is

Blackm. Job, p. 26.

Denn.

¶Anon, Tonf,

† Blackm. Job, p. 23. mifc. part 6. p. 224.

the

the proper engine to deprefs what is high, fo is the fecond to raise what is base and low to a ridiculous vifibility: When both these can be done at once, then is the Bathos in perfection; as when a man is fet with his head downward, and his breech upright, his degradation is complete: one end of him is as high as ever, only that end is the wrong one. Will not every true lover of the Profound be delighted to behold the most vulgar and low actions of life exalted in the following manner?

Who knocks at the Door?

From whom thus rudely pleads my loud-tongu'd gate,

That he may enter?-----

See who is there.

Advance the fringed curtains of thy eyes,
And tell me who comes yonder *.

Shut the Door.

The wooden guardian of our privacy
Quick on its axle turn.-

Bring my Cloaths.

Bring me what Nature, tailor to the bear,
To man himself deny'd; the gave me cold,
But would not give me cloaths.-

Light the Fire.

Bring forth fome remnant of Promethean theft, Quick to expand th' inclement air congeal'd By Boreas' rude breath.----

Snuff the Candle.

Yon' luminary amputation needs;

Thus fhall you fave its half-extinguish'd life.
Open the Letter.

Wax! render up thy truft

*

Uncork the Bottle, and chip the Bread. Apply thine engine to the fpungy door, Set Bacchus from his glaffy prifon free, And ftrip white Ceres of her nut-brown coat.

CHAP. XIII.

A project for the advancement of the Bathos.

THUS have I, (my dear countrymen), with incredible pains and diligence, discovered the hidden fources of the Bathos, or, as I may fay, broke open the abyffes of this great deep. And having now established good and wholefome laws, what remains but that all true moderns with their utmost might do proceed to put the fame in execution? In order whereto, I think I fhall, in the fecond place, highly deferve of my country, by propofing fuch a scheme as may facilitate this great end.

As our number is confeffedly far fuperior to that of the enemy, there feems nothing wanting but unanimity among ourselves. It is therefore humbly offered, that all and every individual of the Bathos, do enter into a firm affociation, and incorporate into one regular body, whereof every mem*Theobald, Double Falsehood.

ber,

ber, even the meaneft, will fomeway contribute to the fupport of the whole; in like manner, as the weakest reeds, when joined in one bundle, become infrangible. To which end our art ought to be put upon the fame foot with other arts of this age. The vast improvement of modern manufactures arifeth from their being divided into feveral branches, and parcelled out to feveral trades: for inftance, in clock-making, one artift makes the balance, another the fpring, another the crownwheels, a fourth the cafe, and the principal-workman puts all together. To this economy we owe the perfection of our modern watches, and doubtlefs we also might that of our modern poetry and rhetoric, were the feveral parts branched out in the like manner.

Nothing is more evident than that divers perfons, no other way remarkable, have each a strong difpofition to the formation of fome particular trope or figure. Ariftotle faith, that the byperbole is an ornament fit for young men of quality; accordingly we find in thofe gentlemen a wonderful propensity toward it, which is marvellously improved by travelling: foldiers alfo and feamen are very happy in the fame figure. The periphrafis or circumlocution is the peculiar talent of countryfarmers; the proverb and apologue of old men at their clubs; the ellipfis or fpeech by half-words, of minifters and politicians; the apofiopefis, of courtiers; the litotes or diminution, of ladies, whisperers, and backbiters; and the anadiplofis, of common criers and hawkers, who, by redoubling the fame words, perfuade people to buy their oysters, green hastings, or new ballads. Epithets may be

found

found in great plenty at Billingfgate, farcafm and irony learned upon the water, and the epiphonema or exclamation, frequently from the bear-garden, and as frequently from the Hear him of the house of commons.

Now each man applying his whole time and genius upon his particular figure, would doubtlefs attain to perfection; and when each became incorporated and fworn into the fociety, (as hath been' proposed), a poet or orator would have no more to do but to fend to the particular traders in each kind, to the metaphorift for his allegories, to the mile-maker for his comparifons, to the ironit for his farcafms, to the apothegmatift for his fentences, &c. whereby a dedication or fpeech would be compofed in a moment, the fuperior artist having nothing to do but to put together all the materials.

I therefore propose that there be contrived with all convenient dispatch, at the public expence, a rhetorical cheft of drawers, confifting of three ftories, the highest for the deliberative, the middle for the demonftrative, and the loweft for the judr cial. Thefe fhall be divided into loci, or places, being repofitories for matter and argument in the feveral kinds of oration or writing; and every drawer fhall again be subdivided into cells, refembling thofe of cabinets for rarities. The apartment for peace or war, and that of the liberty of the prefs, may in a very few days be filled with feveral arguments perfectly new; and the vituperative partition will as eafily be replenished with a moit choice collection, entirely of the growth and manufacture of the prefent age. Every compofer will foon be taught the ufe of this cabinet, and

how