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How hard for real worth to gain its price !
A man shall make his fortune in a trice,
If bleft with pliant, tho' but slender, fense,
Feign'd modesty, and real impudence:
A supple knee, smooth tongue, an easy grace,
A curse within, a smile
his face ;
A beauteous fifter, or convenient wife,
Are prizes in the lottery of life;
Genius and virtue they will soon defeat,
And lodge you in the bosom of the great.
To merit, is but to provide a pain
For men's refusing what you ought to gain.
May, DODINGTON, this maxim fail in
Whom my presaging thoughts already view
By WALPOLE's conduct fir'd, and friendship grac'd,
Still higher in your Prince's favour plac'd;
And lending, here, those awful councils aid,
Which you, abroad, with such success obey'd :
Bear this from one, who holds your friendship dear;
What most we will, with ease we fancy near.
OUND some fair tree th' ambitious Woodbine grows,
And breathes her sweets on the supporting boughs ;
So sweet the verse, th' ambitious verse, should be,
(O! pardon' mine) that hopes support from thee;
Thee, Compton, born o'er fenates to preside,
Their dignity to raise, their councils guide ;
Deep to discern, and widely to survey,
And kingdoms fates, without ambition, weigh;
Of diftant virtues nice extremes to blend,
The Crown's asserter, and the People's friend;
Nor doft thou scorn, amid sublimer vịews,
To listen to the labours of the muse;
Thy smiles protect her, while thy talents fire,
And 'tis but half thy glory to inspire.
Vex'd at a public fame, so justly won,
The jealous CHREMES is with spleen undone ;
CHREMES, for airy pensions of renown,
Devotes his service to the State and Crown;
All schemes he knows, and, knowing, all improves,
Tho’ Britain's thankless, ftill this patriot loves :
But patriots differ; some may shed their blood,
He drinks his coffee, for the public good;
Consults the sacred steam, and there foresees
What storms, or fun-fhine, Providence decrees ;
Knows, for each day, the weather of our fate ;
A quid nunc is an almanack of State.
You smile, and think this statesman void of use:
Why may not time his secret worth produce ?
Since apes can roast the choice Caftanian Nut,
Since steeds of genius are expert at Put;
Since half the Senate Not content can fay,
Geese nations fave, and puppies plots betray.
What makes him model realms, and counsel kings !
An incapacity for smaller things :
Poor Chremes can't conduct his own estate,
And thence has undertaken Europe's fate.
Gehenno leaves the realm to Chremes' skill,
And boldly claims a province higher still:
To raise a name, th' ambitious boy has got,
At once, a Bible, and a spoulder-knot ;
Deep in the secret, he looks thro' the whole,
And pities the dull rogue that saves his soul;
To talk with rev’rence you must take good heed,
Nor shock his tender reason with the Creed:
Howe'er well bred, in public he complies,
Obliging friends alone with blafphemies.
Peerage is poison, good estates are bad
For this disease; poor rogues run feldom mad.
Have not attainders brought unhop'd relief,
And falling stocks quite cur'd an unbelief?
While the sun shines, BLUNT talks with wondrous force ;
But thunder mars small beer, and weak discourse.
Such useful instruments the weather show,
Just as their Mercury is high or low:
Health chiefly keeps an Atheist in the dark;
A fever argues better than a Clarke :
Let but the logick in his pulse decay,
The Grecian he'll renounce, and learn to pray ;
While C mourns, with an unfeigned zeal,
Th’ apoftate youth, who reason'd once so well.
C-, who makes fo merry with the Creed,
He almost thinks he disbelieves indeed;
But only thinks fo; to give both their due,
Satan, and be, believe, and tremble too.
Of some for glory such the boundless rage,
That they're the blackest scandal of their age.
NARCISSUS the Tartarian club disclaims;
Nay, a Free-mafon, with some terror, names;
Omits no duty; nor can envy say,
He miss’d, these many years, the Church, or Play :
He makes no noise in Parliament, 'tis true;
pays his debts, and visit, when 'tis due ;
His character and gloves are ever clean,
And then, he can out-bow the bowing dean ;
A smile eternal on his lip he wears,
Which equally the wife and worthless shares.
In gay fatigues, this most undaunted chief,
Patient of idleness beyond belief,
Moft charitably lends the town his face,
For ornament, in ev'ry public place;
As fure as cards, he to th' assembly comes,
And is the furniture of drawing-rooms :
When Ombre calls, his hand and heart are free,
And, join'd to two, he fails not to make three :
NARCISSUS is the glory of his race;.
For who does nothing with a better grace?
my list, by nature were design'd
Such shining expletives of human kind,
Who want, while thro' blank life they dream along,
Sense to be right, and pafron to be wrong.
To counterpoise this hero of the mode,
Some for renown are fingular and odd;
What other men dislike, is sure to please,
Of all mankind, these dear antipodes;
Thro' pride, not malice, they run counter still,
And birth-days are their days of dressing ill.
Are-T is a fool, and Fm a fage,
S-LY will fright you, E-- engage;
By nature streams run backward, flame descends,
Stones mount, and Sm-x is the worst of friends;
They take their rest by day, and wake by night,
And blush, if you surprize them in the right ;
If they by chance blurt out, ere well aware,
A swan is white, or Q
Y is fair.
Nothing exceeds in ridicule, no doubt,
A fool in fashion, but a fool that's out,
His passion for absurdity's so strong,
He cannot bear a rival in the wrong;
the mode, comply; more sense is shewn
'In wearing others' follies, than your own.
If what is out of fashion most you prize,
should endeavour to be wise.
But what in oddness can be more sublime
Than S, the foremost toman of his time?
His nice ambition lies in curious fancies,
His daughter's portion a rich shell inhances,
And AsH MOLE's baby-house, is, in his view,
Britannia's golden mine, a rich Peru!