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morning gone a birding; I have receiv'd from her another embaffy of meeting; 'twixt eight and nine is the hour, mafter Brook. Ford. 'Tis paft eight already, fir.

Fal. Is it? I will then addrefs me to my appointment. Come to me at your convenient leifure, and you fhall know how I fpeed; and the conclufion fhall be crown'd with your enjoying her; adieu: you fhall have her, master Brook; mafter Brook, you shall cuckold Ford.

[Exit.

Ford. Hum! ha! is this a vifion? is this a dream? do I fleep? mafter Ford, awake; awake, mafter Ford; there's a hole made in your beft coat, mafter Ford: this 'tis to be married! this 'tis to have linen, and buck-baskets! well, I will proclaim myself what I am; I will now take the lecher; he is at my house; he cannot 'fcape me; 'tis impoffible he fhould; he cannot creep into a half-penny purfe, nor into a pepper-box. But, left the devil that guides him fhould aid him, I will fearch impoffible places; though what I am I cannot avoid, yet to be what I would not fhall not make me tame: if I have horns to make one mad, let the proverb go with me, I'll be horn-mad. [Exit.

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Enter mistress Page, mistress Quickly, and William.

Mrs. PAGE.

S he at mistress Ford's already, think'ft thou?

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Quic. Sure, he is by this, or will be presently; but, truly he is very courageous mad about his throwing into the water miftrefs Ford defires you to come fuddenly.

Mrs. Page. I'll be with her by and by; I'll but bring my young man here to school. Look, where his mafter comes; 'tis a playingday, I fee. How now, fir Hugh, no school to-day?

Enter

Enter Evans.

Eva. No; mafter Slender is let the boys leave to play.
Quic. Bleffing of his heart!

Mrs. Page. Sir Hugh, my husband says, my fon profits nothing in the world at his book; I pray you, ask him some questions in his accidence.

Eva. Come hither, William; hold up your head, come.

Mrs. Page. Come on, firrah; hold up your head; answer your mafter, be not afraid.

Eva. William, how many numbers is in nouns?

Will. Two.

Quic. Truly, I thought there had been one number more, because they fay, odd's nowns.

Eva. Peace your tatlings. What is Fair, William?

Will. Pulcher.

Quic. Poulcats? there are fairer things than poulcats, fure. Eva. You are a very fimplicity 'oman; I pray you, peace. What is Lapis, William?

Will. A ftone.

Eva. And what is a ftone, William?

Will. A pebble.

Eva. No, it is Lapis: I pray you, remember in your prain.
Will. Lapis.

Eva. That is a good William: what is he, William, that does lend articles?

Will. Articles are borrow'd of the pronoun,and be thus declin'd, Angulariter nominativo, hic, hæc, hoc.

Eva. Nominativo, hig, hag, hog; pray you, mark: genitivo, ujus: well, what is your accufative cafe?

Will. Accufative, hinc.

Eva. I pray you, have your remembrance, child; accufative, Bung, bang, bog.

Quic. Hang hog is Latin for bacon, I warrant you.

Eva. Leave your prabbles, 'oman. What is the focative cafe, William ?

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Will. O, vocativo, o.

Eva. Remember, William, focative is, caret.
Quic. And that's a good root.

Eva. 'Oman, forbear.

Mrs. Page. Peace.

Eva. What is your genitive cafe plural, William?
Will. Genitive cafe?

Eva. Ay.

Will. Genitive, horum, harum, borum.

Quic. 'Vengeance of Giney's cafe! fie on her! never name her, child, if fhe be a whore.

Eva. For fhame, 'oman.

Quic. You do ill to teach the child fuch words: he teaches him to hick and to hack, which they'll do faft enough of themselves; and to call horum; fie upon you!

Eva. ’Oman, art thou lunacies? hast thou no understandings for thy cafes, and the numbers of the genders? thou art as foolish christian creatures as I would defire.

Mrs. Page. Pr'ythee, hold thy peace.

Eva. Show me now, William, fome declenfions of your

pronouns.

Will. Forfooth, I have forgot.

Eva. It is, qui, quæ, quod; if you forget your qui's, your quæ's, and your quod's, you must be preeches; go your ways, and play, go Mrs. Page. He is a better scholar than I thought he was. Eva. He is a good fprag memory. Farewel, miftrefs Page. Mrs. Page. Adieu, good fir Hugh. Get you home, boy. Come, we stay too long.

[Exeunt

Fal.

'M'

SCENE IL
Ford's house.

Enter Falftaff, and mistress Ford.

ISTRESS Ford, your forrow hath eaten up my fufferance; I fee, you are obfequious in your love,

and

and I profess requital to a hair's breadth, not only, mistress Ford, in the fimple office of love, but in all the accoutrement, complement, and ceremony of it. But are you fure of your husband now?

Mrs. Ford. He's a birding, fweet fir John.

Mrs. Page. [within] What hoa, goffip Ford! what hoa!
Mrs. Ford. Step into the chamber, fir John.

Enter miftrefs Page.

[Ex. Falstaft.

Mrs.Page. How now, sweet heart? who's at home befides yourself?

Mrs. Ford. Why, none but mine own people.

Mrs. Page. Indeed?

Mrs. Ford. No, certainly. — Speak louder.

Mrs. Page. Truly, I am so glad you have no body here.
Mrs. Ford. Why?

Mrs. Page. Why, woman, your husband is in his old lunes again; he fo takes on yonder with my husband, fo rails against all married mankind, fo curfes all Eve's daughters of what complexion foever, and so buffets himself on the forehead, crying, peer-out, peer-out; that any madnefs I ever yet beheld feem'd but tameness, civility, and patience to this diftemper he is in now; I am glad, the fat knight is not here.

Mrs. Ford. Why, does he talk of him?

Mrs. Page. Of none but him; and fwears he was carry'd out, the last time he fearch'd for him, in a bafket; protefts to my husband he is now here; and hath drawn him and the rest of their company from their fport, to make another experiment of is fufpicion; but I am glad, the knight is not here; now he hall fee his own foolery.

Mrs. Ford. How near is he, mistress Page?

Mrs. Page. Hard by, at ftreet's end, he will be here anon.
Mrs. Ford. I am undone! the knight is here.

Mrs. Page. Why then thou art utterly fham'd, and he's but a dead man. What a woman are you! away with him, away with him; better fhame than murther.

Mrs. Ford. Which way should he go? how should I bestow him? all I put him into the basket again?

SCENE

SCENE III.

Enter Falstaff.

Fal. No, I'll come no more i' th' basket: may I not go out ere he come?

Mrs. Page. Alas, alas, three of mafter Ford's brothers watch the door with piftols, that none should iffue out; otherwise you might flip ere he came but what make you here?

Fal. What fhall I do? I'll creep up into the chimney.

Mrs. Ford. There they always use to discharge their birdingpieces; creep into the kiln-hole.

Fal. Where is it?

Mrs. Ford. He will feek there, on my word: neither prefs, coffer, cheft, trunk, well, vault, but he hath an abstract for the remembrance of fuch places, and goes to them by his note; there is no hiding you in the house.

Fal. I'll go out then.

Mrs. Ford. If you go out in your own semblance, you die, fir John, unless you go out difguis'd. How might we disguise him?

Mrs. Page. Alas-the-day, I know not; there is no woman's gown big enough for him; otherwise he might put on a hat, a muffler, and a kerchief, and so escape.

Fal. Good heart, devise something; any extremity rather than mifchief.

Mrs. Ford. My maid's aunt, the fat woman of Brainford, has a gown above.

Mrs. Page. On my word, it will ferve him; she's as big as he is, and there's her thrumb hat, and her muffler too. Run up, fir John.

Mrs. Ford. Go, go, sweet sir John, mistress Page and I will look fome linen for your head.

Mrs. Page. Quick, quick, we'll come dress you straight; put on the gown the while.

[Exit. Falstaff. Mrs. Ford. I would, my husband would meet him in this shape; he cannot abide the old woman of Brainford; he swears, fhe's a witch, forbad her my house, and hath threatned to beat her.

Mrs.

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