pose in the structure of pens for pigs, but they were not suitable for use in school architecture. But in a majority of cases I have found that men in Boards of Education are about like the rest of mankind-mixed; some good, some bad. Jeremiah's figs repeated. Wheat and tares growing together. Some of them of God's planting; others, the devil's sowing. As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be till the Millennium, light and darkness, good and evil are, in this strange old world, found in intimate association.

Some years since I was present at a meeting of a Board in which it was difficult to decide whether the wise or the foolish were the more numerous party. After long observation I came to the conclusion that five of them were wise men and five otherwise; while the presiding officer uniformly gave the casting vote against the fools. And here I may remark that I have never known a President of a Board who was not the right man for the place. There may be, and doubtless are, many men in this position in the State, who are incapable and worthless; but it has been my good fortune not to come in contact with them; and a presiding officer who is all right, who understands his duties and who is an earnest friend of educational interests, is a pearl of great price. He has the power to be of double the service to the good cause that a private member has.

The members of the Board were Americans, Englishmen, Irishmen, and Germans, in about equal numbers. But it soon became evident that all these nationalities shared in both the wisdom and the folly which characterized the body. One American had sense, and another nary idee." One German had brains, and another had "nichts." One Irishman knew "a good bit", and another knew nothing "at all at all." A majority of the members seemed to be gentlemanly, while some of them were of very low caste in the way of manners. Two of them, a Yankee and a Paddy, were in a state of semi-intoxication.

In the progress of the meeting a very animated debate sprang up relative to certain practices of the lady teachers. Diverse opinions were very emphatically expressed. In the midst of the debate, arose Mr. Jacob Keyerschneidher "to talks mit de motion." Of course Mr. K. was a Teuton, and an exceedingly Teutonic Teuton at that. My descriptive powers would fail me in an attempt to tell your readers of the personal appearance of the said Jacob Key erschneidher. It is said that the earth's diameter is slightly greater in one direction than in another. But so much

could hardly be said of Mr. K. Whether measured perpendicularly or horizontally, the result would be just about the same. The earth is flattened at the poles, and in this particular it bears a very striking resemblance to Mr. Keyerschneidher. His poll, or head, is the flattest part of him. So short was his neck that it required close inspection to tell where his head terminated and where his body began. His dress, as to fit and fashion, was unique to the last degree. Take him as he appeared in his speech that evening, and "we scarce shall look upon his like again." Such, at least, is my belief and prayer.

I am not good at reporting a hash of English and German, and shall, therefore, attempt it in but few words. Mr. Keyerschneidher arose, and at once threw not only his rotund body but also his volcanic soul into the discussion, with a vehemence that Vesuvius never attempted.

Said he "Mr. President, I rises to talks some dings mit de motion. May be I vill speak vords you petter hear dem, vat I tell it to de Poard mit Educations. I hears de shentlemans say dese teachers is goot. Not mooch goot, vat I dinks. Dey goot for nichts, almost. Von day I dinks I vill go for visit some school house. I go and visits five, ten, plenty of school. I gets one school very soon, eight mit de clocks. Some childrens comes pretty soon. De wedder was cold as everydings, but de doors vas shut up tight. Vy vas de teacher not at de school so early and let de children go get dem warm? I vas sorry of the leetle poys, so mooch suffer mit freeze. I vish de lazy teachers be compel to shust pe at dare schools by eight mit de clocks all de mornings and keeps doors wide open to varm de school. One time I meets some leetle few teacher, and I tells dem vy dey not pe to school all de time pefore dey gets dare, sometimes. Dey say dey gets dare very soon every day. Den I vas so mad mit dare sass me, and I dell dem Mein Gott in Himmel! it ish too pad you say some dings dat ish lie. And vat you dinks? Dem teachers shust laughs at me, and goes away. Mr. President, I moves to turn all de teachers out and get as petter ones as never vas. I calls for de previous question on de ayes and noes."

Mr. Quack-and-bosh seconded the motion.

Mr. Yorkshire was "hopposed." He remarked that the rule required teachers to be hat their school ouses hat twenty minutes before nine, and that was hearly henough.

Mr. O'Shanty favored the motion. Sure and bedad he wanted

the doors open. His Pat and Mrs. Malony's bit of a bye had frozen their ears, entirely.

Mr. Brown succeeded after considerable effort in "rising to his feet." (What fool invented this expression? And how high up does one need to go in order to "rise to his feet?") Mr. Brown remarked that it was his oppinion something should be done-it ought to be. In Rhode Island, where he came from, they did so. New England was the cradle of common schools, and he wanted things done here as they did at the east. But Mr. Brown was a good deal troubled with hiccoughs, and his elecutionary habit could hardly be regarded as a success. He sat down, and, being "tired," was soon sound asleep, and dreaming of Rhode Island schools and New England rum.

Most of the number seemed to think that such a topic was unworthy of debate, and they called for the question, which was decided as follows: Ayes: Messrs. Keyerschneidher, Brown, O'Shanty, Worststick, and Quack-and-bosh.-5

Noes Messrs. Blickenleiber, O'Grady, Smith, Grant, Yorkshire and Sharp.-6.

Motion lost.

Board adjourned two weeks.

A few days ago I heard a story of a Kentucky Board of Education, somewhere in the blue grass region. As nearly as I can recollect; the case was as follows: An article had appeared in the Daily Buckshot, complaining that the teachers in the public schools had not received their pay in due time, and great inconvenience was experienced by the fifty teachers of the city. The article was greatly lacking in respect for the Board, and its tone was decidedly querulous. At the next meeting, a great deal was said respecting the offensive article. At length Gen. Rflieman arose "to make a motion." The General is a regular "Kentucky gentleman;" which implies that he is over six feet in height, dresses in shabby genteel style, is never seen with less than four ounces of tobacco in his mouth, attends all the horseraces in the State, is proud of Kentucky, thinks that the United States are located in some remote corner of that blessed State, will allow no one to intimate that all Kentuckians are not "gentlemen," highborn and higherbred. The General took the floor, which he had for an hour been flooding with tobacco juice. He offered the following preamble and resolutions:

WHEREAS, This honorable Board is composed of Kentucky gentlemen of the highest standing in society, whose honor is dearer to them than their lives; and WHEREAS no true Kentuckian will submit to insult, or allow any tarnish to

come upon his name, and WHEREAS, an article has appeared in the Daily Buckshot of this city, reflecting on the official action of this honorable body, therefore, Resolved, That a committee of three of us Kentucky gentlemen be appointed to ascertain who is the author, or authoress of the said calumniating communication.

Resolved, That should it be found that the said article was written by one of the teachers employed by this honorable Board, said teacher be forthwith dismissed.

In support of these resolutions the General spoke for thirty minutes. He said that in the veins of most of the members of that honorable Board, there ran some of the proudest blood of Kentucky-they were descended from the first families of Virginia. If they, in a craven spirit, submit to dishonor the bones of Boone and R. M. Johnson and Desha, and John Morgan would rattle in their honored graves. He was glad that Kentucky did not "grow" its teachers. Most of them were foreign importations. They came from Ohio, New York and Massachusetts; and too many of them were ignorant of what consideration was due to Kentucky gentlemen. An example was needed, and if one teacher pays the penalty of her impertinence, the others will understand their subordinate places. He had no unkind feelings toward the teachers, any more than he had toward the niggers; but he must vindicate his honor, for in Kentucky no man could be regarded a gentleman who would not resent an insult.

The General's speech was rapturously applauded. Only one voice was heard in opposition. Mr. Northman did not approve of the article in the Buckshot. It was not respectful, and should be sorry if it should turn out that any one of their teachers had written it. "But," said he, "we cannot afford to pass these resolutions. It would not become our dignity to show seriousness on such a subject. If we are careful only to perform our duty, we may safely leave our reputation to take care of itself. We should make ourselves cheap by entering upon a crusade against some poor girl who has in an evil moment forgotten propriety. For one, I am not to be frightened by the rattling of John Morgan's bones into greater impropriety than that of which complaint is made. Appoint a detective force, a smelling committee, set them upon the track to scent out the luckless writer; take off her scalp, chignon, switch and all; direct the superintendent of our schools to nail that scalp to his office-door to be a terror to all teachers. Would this heal our wounded honor? Does our character as a Board stand in need of reparation like this? I hope not. It is true that both scriptural and classic precedents can be urged for the passage of these resolutions. The Philistines cut

off the head of Saul and nailed it to the wall of Beth-shan, as a terror to all Israelites. But the action of the Philistines should not be a law to us, so long as we are not worshipers of Dagon and Ashtaroth. Romulus, having slain Remus for leaping over the low walls of Rome, exclaimed: 'So henceforth shall it ever be with all who overleap my walls.' But we do not live in Rome, and need not do as Romans do."

Common sense, however, was at a heavy discount with that Board, and the resolutions passed with but one vote in the negative. That was Northman's, who, five years ago, removed to Kentucky, from the Western Reserve. He at once resigned his office as a member of that Board, remarking that though he had not heretofore given himself much trouble to protect his own. dignity and honor, believing them able to take care of themselves, he could no longer preserve his self-respect, and continued to act with men who would pass and publish such comtemptible resolutions. His resignation was accepted and Col. Basil Duke appointed in his place.

Board adjourned for two weeks.

And so, dear editor, must I adjourn, leaving my subject unfinished. YOURS TRULY.

EXTRACTS FROM AN EVERY-DAY BOOK.

BY W. H. VENABLE.

XI. Intenser heats and more violent storms occur at the tropics than at the equator: so the borders of every contested region are the scene of more severe conflict than the interior.

XII. It would be an interesting study to compare with one another the celebrated Gentlemen of Fiction, among whom are Roger de Coverley, Sir Charles Grandison, Don Quixote, Colonel Newcome, Mr. Pickwick, Amyas Leigh, and John Halifax.

XIII. Michelet says "each addition to woman's influence is a step in morality."

XIV. Neither trust implicitly the authority of the learned, nor slight the belief and testimony of the illiterate. The educated often err, the ignorant are sometimes first to discover truth.