PROLOGUE.

SINCE you affect things new, what I'm to say
Shall be as great a novel as our play,

Custom would have me speak a prologue now,
But that we may entire adherence show
To novelty (which in the mode of plays
Like sovereign nature over custom sways)
I mean my prologue shall a riddle be;
And thus propound it to the company.

A teeming muse, big with imagination,
Conceived a monster of so new a fashion,
That of the hasty birth b'ing brought to bed,
We found it neither had a tail nor head.
The limbs are such, as no proportion bear,
No correspondence have, and yet cohere:
Of several use, and several forms they be,
Yet in the whole contexture they agree :
They are disjoin'd yet united too,
Which cannot but a monster seem to you;
Yet such a monster 'tis, as you'll admit
For pleasure, and still pay for nursing it.

I see y'are puzzl'd; but we so despise Th'advantage we might make by a surprise, That to unriddle this, you here may come And join your heads together in one room, Where, for your money, you shall sit at ease, Two hours a day, till Christmas if you please.

THE PLAY-HOUSE TO BE LET.

The SCENE

THE FIRST ACT.

opens, and upon two stools are discover'd the TIRE-WOMAN and CHAR-WOMAN, one shelling of beans, and the other sewing.

Enter PLAYER and HOUSE-KEEPER, PLAY. WHAT! shelling of beans? 'tis a proper work

For the long vacation. You may e'en dry 'em
In the sun, and lay 'em up in the tiring-house
For the players: they may get bacon to 'em
When the Term comes.

HOUS-K. Nay, you may work on too; 'tis hospital ware:

Coarse shirts for the poor poets.

[Knocking heard at door. PLAY. Are they mad? Sure, they take the playhouse for

The church-yard o'er the way; and mean to wake
Our dead neighbours. What would you have?
[Knocking again.
TIRE-W. Pray, knock civilly! I believe it is
Some country poet with a stock of plays.
He brings his ware to sell when the fair's done.
[Knocking again.
PLAY. Some university muse is in hard labour,
And she takes our Tire-woman for a midwife.
Open the door!-

[Exit Hous-K. and enter again with MONSIEUR. MONS. Be you von, two, tree of de teatre? HOUS-K. We are standing properties of the play-house,

Which, in vacation, lye in pawn for the rent.
MONS. Dat is vel! bi de bill de house is to let.
PLAY. 'Tis to let ! but you, Sir,
knock'd so hard
As if you meant to take it by assault.

MONS. Sir, me beseesh your pardon, and vill give De good mony vor de rent dis vacation.

HOUS.-K. What would you do in't? we must like your trade

Before we let our shop, lest we should ride
With John Dory* to Paris to seek rent.

MONS. Mi vil make presentation of de farce. TIRE-W. Farces, what be those? New French bobs for ladies?

PLAY. Pray, peace! I understand the gentleman. Your farces are a kind of mongrel plays.

But, sir, I believe all French farces are

Prohibited commodities, and will

Not pass current in England.

MONS. Sir, pardon me! de Engelis be more Fantastique den de Fransh. De farce

Bi also very fantastique, and vil passe.

PLAY. The Monsieur's in the right; for we

have found

Our customers of late exceeding humorous.
MONS. De vise nation bi for tings heroique,
And de fantastique, vor de farce!

TIRE-W. I like not that these French pardonney

moys

Should make so bold with old England.

HOUS.-K. Peace, woman! We'll let the house, and get money.

PLAY. But how will your French farce be understood?

For all our travell'd customers are gone

To take the air with their own wives, beyond Hide-Park a great way; a homely country mode * A French private, whose name was proverbial.

Of their fore-fathers.

TIRE-W. With grief we speak it;

They may be asham'd to leave their poor

And us behind 'em without customers.

mistresses

PLAY. Pray, save your tears for our next tragedy.

The Monsieur's all for merry farces, but,

As I said, sir, how shall we understand 'em?

MONS. Me have a troop of French Comœdiens Dat speak a little very good Engelis.

TIRE-W. Bless us! a troop?

PLAY. Woman, thou art no linguist; they in France

Call a company of players, a troop.*

TIRE-W. I thought he had ta'en our long Tennis-Court

For a stable.

PLAY. And you are shelling beans for his

horses.

[Knocking without again. HOUS.-K. Our bill at the door draws in more [Exit House-Keeper.

customers.

PLAY. House-Keeper, look out!

Monsieur, you may draw up your troop of farceurs Within the pales; they may chance to give us

A short trial of their prowess in poetry.

MONS. Vel, sir, you sall see trange ting.

PLAY. Who is't that knock'd?

Enter HOUSE-KEEPER.

HOUS.-K. Nay, there's a couple!

PLAY. What are they?

[Exit Monsieur.

HOUS.-K. Men in their shirts doing penance For the most scandalous sin of poverty;

Two very hot fencers without doublets:

"We say a troop of thieves, a troop of beggars, and a troop of authors; but learn to say a company of comedians! Gil Blas. 3 vols., 8vo, Lond. 1802. Vol. i., p. 309.

They would hire our Play-house.

PLAY. For what use?

HOUS.-K. For a school, where they'd teach the art of duel,

Which is a fit trade in the long vacation :

For nothing makes young gentlemen so quarrelsome As want of money.

PLAY. Tell 'em the Red Bull* stands empty for fencers :

There are no tenants in it but old spiders.
Go, bid the men of wrath allay their heat
With prizes there.

Hous.-K. I told 'em of Pancras-Church, where their scholars,

The Red Bull Theatre was situated in St. John Street, Clerkenwell.

It was at this house that "Green's Tu quoque " was originally produced. That comedy is by Cooke, and was called the City Gallant, but the inimitable acting of Green in the part of Bubble, whose answer to every complaint is "Tu quoque," occasioned the alteration of title. Green is said to have been an excellent clown. He appeared at the theatre in Lincoln's Inn Fields in his celebrated character in 1665, shortly before the production of the present piece, in which, in all probability, he also performed.

That theatres were occasionally let for sword exercise is shewn by Pepys. "June 1st, 1663. The duke having been a-hunting to-day, and so lately come home and gone to bed, we could not see him, and we walked away, and I with Sir J. Minnes, to the Strand May-pole; and there light out of his coach, and walked to the New Theatre, which, since the King's players are gone to the Royal one, is this day begun to be employed by the fencers to play prizes at. And here I came and saw the first prize I ever saw in my life; and it was between one Mathews, who did beat at all weapons, and one Westwicke, who was soundly cut several times both in the head and legs, that he was all over blood; and other deadly blows they did and take in very good earnest, till Westwicke was in a sad pickle. They fought at eight weapons, three boutes at each weapon. This being upon a private quarrel, they did it in good earnest; and I felt one of their swords, and found it to be very little, if at all, blunter on the edge than the common swords are. Strange to see what a deal of money is flung to them both upon the stage between every boute. So, well pleased for once with this sight, I walked home."